Overwhelming Emotions
by AsakuraHannah
Summary: Being woven in his dreams and memories, Rivaille was at a loss. The second encounter with a certain boy made it even much worse than he thought it would be, especially when the boy is reaching his hands out to him again. RiEre. Reincarnation. AU. R
1. Childhood Memory

******Overwhelming **Emotions

**Genre: **Drama Romance AU Reincarnation

**Rating:** T

**Pairing: (mainly)** Rivaille x Eren

**_Summary: _**Being woven in his dreams and memories, Rivaille was at a loss. The second encounter with a certain boy made it even much worse than he thought it would be, especially when the boy is reaching his hands out to him again.

**Disclaimer:**

I don't own Shingeki no Kyojin, but this fanfiction is mine.

© AsakuraHannah on fanfiction net

**_Chapter 1 : Childhood Memory_**

_A seven year old boy with blond hair and blue eyes bit his lips when he looked up hopelessly. His voice cracked when he started to sob, blue eyes staring at the yellow balloon wedged on the branch far above him. He wiped his cheeks which were stained with tears with his small hand and crouched down helplessly, sobbing alone in the small park near his house._

"_Armin!" The boy whose name was called shot his head up when he heard a familiar voice approaching him. His blurry vision saw both of his best friends running towards his direction, looking worried. The boy with green eyes and dark brown hair was running along with his sister, the girl's dark eyes staring towards his direction in worry. Her long black hair fluttered as she ran, following her brother closely._

"_Eren!" Armin called out between his tears, looking up at the boy who tried to catch his breath._

"_Are you alright? That bruise…I knew it! Where are they?!" Eren was already on rage before his sister pushed him off, sending him tumbles a few steps forward._

"_Mikasa!"_

"_Forget about them for now. They are gone anyway. Armin, can you stand?" Mikasa offered her hand and Armin gave a nod._

"_I… can stand on my own… but…" Slowly but surely, the blond boy stood up. Eren followed the shorter boy's blue eyes, staring up at the balloon on the branch. Mikasa gave a sigh, brushing her bangs away from her eyes._

"_I will do it!" Eren said cheerfully. Armin gaped at him for a moment, but he quickly pulled his shirt when Eren started to climb up the tree._

"_Eren, it's dangerous!" Armin shouted, weakly pulling the shirt, making Eren hiss at him._

"_Don't worry about it! Don't pull my shirt, Armin! Remember what that boy said? We got Freedom Wings on our back that can make us fly!" Armin slowly let go, watching his best friend climbing up the tree with his small hands and feet._

"_Eren, you better come down now, it's dangerous! What if those wings never existed? What if he lied?" Mikasa couldn't help but getting worried as she watched her brother climbing up higher and higher._

"_Don't worry, I'm almost there!" he said calmly and brought his body up when his hand reached the lower branch. He adjusted his height for a moment and started crawling to get the balloon. Eren reached out for the thread of the balloon when the branch started to shake. Even with his small body, there's no way that the small branch could handle the weight of a seven year old child. Mikasa and Armin gasped when the branch made a loud cracking sound._

"_Eren! Get back, now!" Armin shouted in worried just in time when Eren grasped the balloon._

"_I got it!" Eren exclaimed, but to his friends' dismay, the branch gave out, making the brunet boy fall along with it. Mikasa closed her eyes in fear and Armin was shouting when the gravity pulled down Eren back to earth. Armin clenched his eyes shut at what time he saw Eren's head almost hit the ground._

_Eren's eyes widened at his sudden fall. He let out a shriek, readying himself to painfully land on the ground. He clenched the balloon tightly, hoping that it would make him fly. As his head fell first before the rest of his body, he saw a black haired boy much bigger than him underneath, looking up at him in worry. Eren knew him… he was the one telling him about all those wings. All those stories about war and freedom… he had listened to him intently._

"_Watch out!" Eren shouted and closed his eyes tightly, readying for what was coming._

"Ouch!" He groaned when his head met the marble floor painfully, his body was wrapped with a blanket like a cocoon. His green eyes opened several times and realizing that he was dreaming, he must have been tossing and turning in his sleep. Eren rubbed the back of his head which already formed a lump; he gave a sigh of relief. _What a dream_. He thought he was falling down for real. Eren slowly sat up and untangled himself from the blanket. His eyes glanced at the clock on his nightstand, realizing that he woke up two hours earlier than usual. He tossed the blanket on the bed and yawned loudly as he stretched his limbs. If his adoptive sister was not having her student council meeting today, he would have beaten the record of waking up earlier than her. Eren turned around to the wardrobe, pulling his brown blazer and long-sleeved white shirt to start getting ready for his first lesson before going to the bathroom.

* * *

Humming nonchalantly, the brunet walked downstairs with his bag swung on his shoulder. He eyed the steps carefully; indeed, waking up early for once in a while was not a bad idea after all. His eyes immediately looked over the small white board hanging on the wall. He scanned a few notes from his father and Mikasa. Mikasa wrote about the chores for Eren to clean the house later as she went to her part-time job after school. She also wrote that she'd gone early for student council meeting. His father had gone early at dawn to the hospital as usual and wouldn't be back until past midnight. Eren picked up the marker and pressed it to his chin for a moment, thinking, before uncapping the marker.

'_Stay healthy, dad. Don't get too tired.' _He re-capped the marker and put it back in its place. Realizing that he still had time before walking out to school, his smile grew and he quickly picked up the phone to call his best friend to walk together. After promising Armin that they would meet in the park near his house, Eren quickly made some toast for breakfast.

Once he was ready to go, Eren scrambled on his feet, tying his shoelaces while munching on his bread. He opened the door before stopping for a moment and turned around towards the photo hanging on the wall.

"I'm going." He whispered to his mom's photo which only smiled back at him in silence. Eren then closed his door shut and locked it.

* * *

"Armin!" Eren called out to him with an almost sloppy grin. The blond raised his head from the book he was reading. His best friend was holding his bag with his other hand and the book on his right hand, reading while waiting for him. He was always earlier than the due time of a promise, being the attentive person that he was. Armin pulled the book down and smiled at him in return.

"Morning, Eren. It's unusual for you to be up this early." Armin noted while putting his book into his bag when Eren stood before him.

"Yes, I had a strange dream of falling down from a tree. Something about freedom wings… weird isn't it?" That made Armin blinked at him.

"I see… It must be a childhood memory." Armin smiled when Eren only looked at him confused.

"Really? I remember in that dream you were crying over a balloon. How come I don't remember that?" Eren gave a chuckle when Armin only smiled at him.

"I remember that, and I'm sure Mikasa also remembers." Armin chuckled back at the taller boy whose frown went deeper.

'_Am I forgetting something?'_ He let the thought go when Armin started talking about the world and strange places he discovered from the monthly magazine he bought the other day. Eren was sure that his friend's dream would be fulfilled one day to travel around the world. Together they walked to school laughing and chatting.

**TBC**

Yay~ My first Riere/EreRi ff for Shingeki no Kyojin! XD

Tell me what you think for this prologue =P I will try my best to go on and make this much better. By each chp ;D


	2. Question and Answer

**Overwhelming Emotions**

**Genre: **Drama Romance AU Reincarnation

**Rating:** T

**Pairing: (mainly)** Rivaille x Eren

**_Summary: _**Being woven in his dreams and memories, Rivaille was at a loss. The second encounter with a certain boy made it even much worse than he thought it would be, especially when the boy is reaching his hands out to him again.

**Disclaimer:**

I don't own Shingeki no Kyojin, but this fanfiction is mine.

© AsakuraHannah at Ffn

**_Chapter 2 : Question and Answer_**

Eren walked out from the library, waiting for Armin to follow him out from the building. He looked over his watch when he recognized the time for their first lesson. Both of them had gone to the library since they had arrived at school much earlier than normal. When they both arrived in their class, Eren heard a lot more chattering between the girls than usual. Both friends headed to their seat at the back rows, looking around their classmates.

"Marco, what's going on? Did something happen?" Eren asked the boy who sat in front of him while taking out a few textbooks and pen. The black haired student turned his head around and shook his head in confusion.

"I don't know. I overheard the girls' conversation saying that there is a new teacher. But I'm not sure yet if the info is right." Eren blinked when he heard him before rolling his eyes and shook his head.

"Girls…" he muttered with annoyance, earning a chuckle from Armin. Armin knew that Eren never got along well with the girls, nor had he ever seen his friend become interested with girls other than his adopted sister, Mikasa Ackerman. It was probably because of her that Eren had never shown any interest in females that she became attached to him like glue. Speaking of which, Marco looked around for the so-called sister.

"Where's Mikasa?" the boy named Marco asked in wonder. Usually Eren was rarely seen without his adopted sister by his side.

"She already went to the council room early this morning. She had a meeting." He put his bag on the chair before sighing deeply. Armin noticed his demeanor was a bit off than usual and patted his shoulder.

"You look worried. What's wrong?" Eren huffed at the concern coming from him before chuckling.

"Nothing, really. She didn't seem to be in a good condition when she woke me up this morning." He replied shortly and put his head on the desk. Mikasa said she had a meeting on the morning right after she woke him up. Due to the fact that he was half asleep, Eren only mumbled sleepily at her and went back to sleep. He was surprised when he was woken up by the cold hard floor. Much to his relief, he woke up earlier than before. It's not like he wished to be late attending anyway. His homeroom teacher, Irvin Sensei was very kind towards the students, and he seemed to have high expectations about coming to class on time. He dislikes tardiness; that's why Eren tried to avoid getting a detention during lunch time. It's not like his teacher would give anything like an extra homework, but Eren preferred to be outside during lunch time, of course. No one liked detention, even if the punishment was reading textbooks and having an extra study session with the teacher.

"Maybe she's overworking herself? Being on the Student Council and having a part-time job at the same time is not easy." Armin noted. Eren raised his eyes to look at the blonde, staring at him in silence for a moment.

The class suddenly stopped talking when the door slid open by their homeroom teacher. Eren quickly adjusted himself to sit properly. He looked over the front and saw that Irvin was alone. There is no new teacher as the rumor said; maybe it's a new student? His eyes shifted to the unclosed door.

"Morning class." Irvin spoke out and the class greeted him back. The whispers among students started as Irvin turned around to write something on the board. Some students who were sitting near the door tried to peak outside curiously. As Irvin turned around, the students stopped talking, earning a small smile on his lips.

"I would like to introduce someone who'll be my assistant for the next three months. He has an internship here at this school and he would like to help me teach all of you. Rivaille, you can come in." Irvin called out the man's name, making all eyes turn to the door. Whispers and excitements were voiced out as the male entered the classroom. Eren looked at Armin who slightly went frigid while his eyes went wide. The book he was holding fell on the desk with a dull thump sound.

"What's wrong?" Eren whispered, noticing the behavior of his friend. Armin looked at him, and quickly shook his head.

"Nothing, he just seemed so young." Eren stared at him for a moment and gave a small nod, unsure if Armin was lying or not.

Irvin patted Rivaille's shoulder and looked at the students as he raised his hand, stopping the chattering. Rivaille coughed a little and raised his head to start introducing himself.

"Good morning, class. I'm Rivaille; I'll be in this school for about three months. I currently have an internship and would like to learn a lot from teaching here. I hope all of you will help me out by being good students. I am taking a lot of language classes for my studies; therefore I know several languages, such as English, German, and French. You can ask me whenever you need help with them." After he finished with his introductions, almost all the girls were eager to get to know him. Irvin smiled when Rivaille clicked his tongue in annoyance.

"Well then, Rivaille. While this is the first day for you, why don't you handle this class for homeroom as well? If you need anything, you can ask me." Rivaille gave a nod at him.

They both stopped when suddenly the classroom door opened by a girl with black hair and dark emotionless eyes. There were a few other students with her when she walked inside. Both teachers turned their attention to them. Already, Rivaille's brow arched up, thinking that they were a bit too late until his eyes landed on the black haired girl at the front. The girl gazed at him, their eyes meeting for a few seconds, blinking when the strange man stared at her with a stoic expression.

"Good morning, Sensei. We were just finished with the student council meeting. Pardon us." Mikasa gave a slight bow to them; her eyes questioningly looked at Rivaille.

"Okay, Mikasa. Go ahead and sit; Annie, Bertholdt, and Reiner."

"Thank you, Sir." Rivaille's eyes followed them as the four students walked towards their seat.

Mikasa silently led her friends and nodded at them before going to her own seat, wondering who the male was. He looked quite old to be a student and he looked much too young to be a teacher. The class was still noisy among the girls' enthusiasm. As she took her seat, Armin and Eren both smiled at her.

"Who is he?" She whispered to both of them. She couldn't help but feel a bit curious when those gray eyes were staring at her previously. He seemed familiar.

"An internship student, he's going to be here for the three months helping Irvin Sensei with class." Eren explained before Armin could say anything. Mikasa looked at Rivaille who took the absent book from Irvin while the man gave him short explanations that needed to be done. As Irvin walked out the room, Rivaille faced the students before he sighed.

"Okay, can all of you calm down for a moment?" He raised his voice to quiet down the noisy girls. The voices went down before each of them settled and listened for him to continue. Rivaille brought his hand up to his mouth, thinking for a moment, confirming something. He then lowered his hand and put both of his palms on the table, leaning against it.

"Since this is my first day, let's have a question and answer session. You can ask anything about me." He directly looked at the girls who were giggling when he mentioned it. A few hands rose to let him choose and Rivaille scanned his eyes before he realized that he did not know their names yet.

"You, the girl with brown ponytail hair. What's your name and question?" He nodded at her.

"Sasha Blouse, sir. Do you like steamed potatoes?" she immediately asked and Rivaille raised his eyebrow in confusion. The whole class laughed at the question.

"Sasha, can't you ask something else?!" a bald boy beside her scolded her. Rivaille shook his head when he heard someone say that Sasha's head is only filled with food.

"…I eat everything that's edible." He answered anyway while his eyes scanned the students and stopped on a green eyed boy who was looking bored while staring blankly at him. He stared at his eyes for a moment before a girl interrupted him.

"Sir, can we know your age?" Rivaille's eyes change direction to the girl with blonde hair. He doesn't remember giving permission to question.

"I don't recall giving you permission to question me." Almost all the smiles and giggling halted the minute those words flew from his mouth. Rivaille clicked his tongue. That sure picked up interest to the green eyed boy.

"Stand up. What's your name?" Rivaille crossed his arms over his chest; his look darkened as he asked her. She blushed as the entire class attention was now turned to her. She slowly stood up in fear, biting her lower lip.

"I- I'm Christa, sir." Her voice cracked when she answered. Their eyes met for a moment before Rivaille broke the silence.

"Okay, this should remind you and the whole class that if I did not give permission to talk, then you won't be talking. Understood?" The girl quickly nodded and all eyes shifted to Rivaille who stood firm in the front of the class.

"Okay, now sit down. As for your question, I'm 23 years old." He said, nodding for her to sit. The bell rang as soon as Christa sat down which signaled that the homeroom session was over. Rivaille was reminded that he should be doing absent lists sooner. He quickly opened the absent book Irvin had left for him as he sat down.

"Okay, now I will be quick. Be sure to raise your hand and answer when I call out your name. Armin Arlelt." Rivaille started and raised his head to look at the hand up. The blonde boy quickly said "yes" and puts his hand down when Rivaille gave a nod.

"Next, Annie Leonhart." He repeated his action and nodded when the certain blond girl's hand shot up and answered him.

"Bertholdt Fubar." Another hand raised and Rivaille gave a nod. He needed to make sure that he remembered each name and which students he had been calling on his first day. Including the student council members so that next time they were having a meeting, he'd know.

"Connie Springer." His eyes met the bald boy previously, sitting beside Sasha. He gave a nod when Connie raised his hand and answered. The next name made him stare at it for a second. _Eren Jaeger._ His gray eyes scanned the name and looked up at the student.

"Eren Jaeger." He whispered the name. When he raised his head, he noticed Armin and the student council girl earlier were looking at the brunet with green eyes. His wonders were confirmed when he called out his name for a second time and all eyes turned to the boy. Those green eyes were staring back at him with a blank expression. Rivaille glared at him when Armin slowly whispered his name.

"Eren…" Armin whispered.

"Eren Jeager." Rivaille raised his voice, making Eren's eyes focused on him now and was surprised when he saw Rivaille was already glaring daggers at him.

"Eren Jeager, you sure have nerves to ignore me…" His tone was so deep and dangerously harsh. Erin stiffened when he heard him and quickly scrambled to his feet. He looked like he could kill just by glaring in the eyes of others.

"I'm sorry, sir!" Rivaille watched the boy named Eren as he sweat in fear. He inhaled deeply before he gave a loud sigh.

"Since it's my first day, I will let this go. Don't do it again or I will assume that you are absent. Now, sit down!" Rivaille reprimanded him before he marked his name on the list. Eren quietly sat down and Mikasa tapped his shoulder when Rivaille called out Jean Kirschtein and Marco Bott.

"Are you alright?" She asked in worry, earning a nod from him.

"I was just lost in thought." Eren mumbled back.

"Mikasa Ackerman." Rivaille called out and she quickly pulled her hand up while making sure she gave a hateful glare towards the midget teacher.

"Yes, sir!" she said firmly, eyes darkening when their eyes met for the second time. Rivaille stared at her for a second.

'_Is she mad at me because I scolded Eren?'_He rolled his eyes at the thought before he gave a lazy nod and marked her name. He went down the list until he finished calling out the whole class. After he was done, Rivaille closed the absent book and gave the permission for the class to continue with their next lesson. The students stayed silent when Rivaille was about to leave the room, somehow afraid to interrupt, that is until Mikasa decided to stand up.

"Our first class is English, sir." Rivaille looked at Mikasa who dared to speak up.

"And? Your teacher is?"

"It should be Irvin Sensei." She said stiffly at him. Rivaille realized that he needed to teach them today. He snatched the textbook Irvin gave him earlier.

"Alright, all of you open your book. I want to know what page you are all studying until Irvin comes back here." The class started and Rivaille tried his best to hold all his shouts at Irvin for not telling him anything. That guy sure is annoying as usual.

**TBC**

**:) I made a small strip of doujin for this chp. **

**You can go ahead and check it in my tumblr (asakurahannah) or**

**DA: ********asakuranohana[.[deviantart[.[com/art/Second-Meetin g-385442667** **if you want. Just remove the ' [ ' and space. The links are in my profile :D ****I guess I'm enjoying RiEre too much xDD**

**Reviews are much appreciated.**


	3. Punishments

**Overwhelming Emotions**

**Genre: **Drama Romance AU Reincarnation

**Rating:** T

**Pairing: (mainly)** Rivaille x Eren

**_Summary: _**Being woven in his dreams and memories, Rivaille was at a loss. The second encounter with a certain boy made it even much worse than he thought it would be, especially when the boy is reaching his hands out to him again.

**Disclaimer:**

I don't own Shingeki no Kyojin, but this fanfiction is mine.

© AsakuraHannah at fanfiction . net

**_Chapter 3 : Punishments_**

_Eren found himself lying on the soft grass, staring up at the deep blue sky. He was sure that he could fall asleep at any moment now. As he blinked, trying to stay awake, Eren found a shadow looming over him and his pupil focused on the person looking down at him. Those gray eyes seemed familiar. Eren smiled as he reached his hand up and brought it to touch the boy's cheek lightly only for his vision to blacked out._

Eren slowly opened his eyes, hands grasping onto thin air, groaning when he slowly woke up from his dream. Turning to his side, he softly rubbed his eyes and propped himself up. Eren's gaze drifted to the clock on the nightstand, eyes widening when he saw the time.

"What?! This must be broken!" He shouted in frustration. There was no way was he going to miss the first class today. He quickly got himself ready and ran towards his adopted sister's room. He knew that Mikasa was still in the house; if she had gone earlier, she would have at least told him last night.

"Mikasa! Why didn't you wake me-" Eren stopped when he realized that Mikasa was still in bed. He slowly walked towards her, worry was etched on his face.

"Wait, are you alright?" he kneeled down beside the bed when she just groaned at him. Eren ran his hand on her forehead, sucking in his breath when he felt the fever.

"You're sick. What time did you got home last night, Mikasa?!" Eren then held back his scolding when he watched her frowning at him. It was rare to see his sibling in this condition. Mikasa hardly ever got sick.

"Sorry, I will make something warm for you." He muttered and rose to his feet.

"No need, Eren. You are late already." She said, trying to sit up but her brother only pushed her down.

"It's fine. Wait here, I will bring medicine too."

"Wait, Eren. There's soup in the refrigerator from last night. Just warm that up." Mikasa said before the boy wasted any time to make something from scratch. Eren nodded and quickly ran downstairs. His father must have gone ahead to work at dawn, so there was only the two of them.

* * *

Eren hurriedly ran towards his classroom, almost tripping on his way before he took a deep breath. His trembling hand opened the classroom door, peeking inside the room. The brunet found out that Rivaille was in the middle of reading over the textbook. He slowly stepped inside as he felt the whole class looking at him. The assistant teacher glared when Eren dared to step inside, green eyes staring at him in fear.

"You are late, Jaeger."

"I'm sorry, sir. I-Mikasa-"

"No excuses!" Rivaille slammed his pen down, and Eren flinched at the sound. He watched as Rivaille slowly walked towards him, their height difference becoming evidently clear. Even if Eren was fifteen years old, the so-called teacher was much shorter than him. But Eren didn't dare to look at the man in the eyes, afraid that Rivaille would think that he was looking down on him. Everyone knew Rivaille as the one they shouldn't object. Not even an excuse for being late. Yesterday, Connie was late to class after lunch time and Rivaille was seriously pissed when he was being interrupted by the sudden burst in from the entrance. He had Connie's forehead swollen with chalk when Rivaille accurately threw it at him, and then had him stand outside the classroom with two buckets full of water. Now the same thing might happen to Eren as well, the brunet fears.

"Go take two buckets full of water and stand in front of the door outside." Eren bit his lip at that and he had no choice but to do what he was told.

"And Jaeger," Rivaille stopped him before Eren turned to leave.

"Don't you dare sit down outside, or I will make sure you wished to transfer to a different school as soon as I find out." His voice sounded dangerously low, making Eren gulp and gave him a nod quickly that Rivaille was sure he had hurt his neck in the process. Eren closed the door with a sigh only to squeak and jump when Rivaille suddenly opened the door. Their eyes met for a moment. Eren was sweating and did not dare to move an inch as the older man's eyes glowered at him.

"Don't give out a disappointed sigh. Go now, I will wait until you come back here. Just to make sure that you don't run away. Now!" Rivaille scowled as the kid ran to the bathroom. He wondered what had happened to Mikasa. Eren did mention it when he tried to explain. The girl was nowhere to be found; maybe she had another council meeting? His thoughts were interrupted when Eren came back much quicker than he thought. His steps were wobbly as he tried to balance himself between his steps back to the class with two medium-sized buckets filled with water in his grasp. Rivaille's eyes were following every movement of the boy's until he stopped directly in front of him, out of breath.

"Now stand here and don't move an inch." The teacher commanded him and closed the door behind. Eren groaned at his bad luck. Maybe he shouldn't have gone to the class today, or even skip the whole period until the next class. His weary mind couldn't even think straight anymore. He was sure that Rivaille did not like him even one bit. The first time they met each other Eren was spacing out and made the teacher to scold him harshly. And now this?! It's only been two days the man started teaching! His eyes gazed almost lifelessly outside the window with a bored expression, trying to forget the weight on both of his hands. It was a punishment; the bucket of water was usually for only one person to hold, but Rivaille made it two. It was going to make his legs quickly become tired with the heavy burden on each side of his body.

Eren gave a soft sigh before he bit his lip, trying not to sigh too much lest of Rivaille finding out. Eren noticed someone was walking towards his direction; it was Irvin-sensei.

"Eren? What's wrong?" The blonde male asked with a soft chuckle. He rarely got punishments unless he fought with Jean. Both being boys who always compete against each other, Irvin knew that Mikasa was always there to stop them recently, so Eren rarely got a detention. He was about to go inside the classroom to check when he found the boy standing in front of the classroom with two buckets of water. Eren only gave a small laugh, and nodded to him as a change of the bow.

"I was late to the class, Irvin-sensei."

"I see. What happened that made you late for first period?"

"Ah… Mikasa is sick, so no one is able to take care of her. She had a high fever this morning. I hope she's getting better." Eren explained to him honestly, making Irvin smile. The boy had no reason to lie.

"I see. Is your father at work?"

"Yes, sir; He might not be home until late again." Irvin gave another nod understandingly. He did not ask about Eren's mother since he knew that she had passed away five years ago.

"Didn't you explain to Rivaille about the reason you are late?" Irvin asked in wonder. Eren paused for a moment before he shook his head.

"I tried to, but he cut me off before I'm able to give any explanation." Eren said, shifting his eyes to the floor. He felt bad for some reason, as if he was reporting Rivaille's bad deeds to his superior. Irvin gave a sigh.

"That guy never changes, does he? He's been too stiff." Green eyes turned up to look at him, Irvin gave a smile.

"Did you… know him… personally, sir?" Eren asked slowly, unsure if he should be asking about it while the person himself was just a few steps away from him.

"He's actually my cousin. I'm the one who suggested for him to have an internship here. I want him to at least have some experience other than his usual daily life. Ever since he entered the military a few years ago, it seemed that he'd been too stiff on his daily life."

"Military?!" Eren quickly bit his bottom lip when he shot the question informally to the teacher. He was glad when Irvin gave a nod.

"Yes, maybe he was a bit harsh in some way, but it's not like his heart is made of steel. That's why I wanted him to give him a much easier job after he finished his studies in college.

"I see…" Eren mumbled, unsure of what else he was supposed to say. Irvin checked his watch.

"Seeing that the time is almost over for the first period, I guess you can wait outside for a bit more." Sure enough, the bell rang just in time as Irvin walked away. Eren gave a sigh of relief and waited until the students walked outside the classroom. Most of his friends were grinning at him when they walked out. Jean chuckled and punched Eren's arm. Eren hissed at him, earning a commotion from the other. Armin quickly came over them to stop before both of them get detention; Mikasa was not there to stop them after all. A crowd started to form when the two of them started fighting.

"That hurt, you bastard!" Eren scowled at Jean who got mad at the name calling.

"What did you say, midget?!" He shouted.

"You don't know your own strength, do you? My arms are already tired, these buckets are heavy!"

"Like I give a damn! You don't have to call me that!"

"It suits you better!" They kept on bickering at each other, voice getting louder and louder. Rivaille, who heard the commotions, quickly walked over to them, which was bad timing. Jean, who was getting really mad at him, shoved Eren on the door, earning a few gasps. Eren who tried to push the taller boy away from him accidentally dropped the buckets and the water splashed everywhere. Now he was soaking wet with his classmate, Rivaille included when he just stepped outside to check, much for every students' nightmare. Both Jean and Eren gaped at the man who was drenched in the process.

"Both of you… are dead." Rivaille hissed dangerously as he snapped his fingers. Both Eren and Jean backed away against the door in fear.

"Rivaille." Someone called out to him and all eyes fell on Irvin who walked back when he heard a ruckus. He eyed the wet boys and shook his head.

"There is a change of clothes in the infirmary. You can go there and change to a new fresh clothes, Rivaille. As for you boys, you'll change and go to the next class immediately. You will get a detention at lunch time. Is that clear?" Irvin quickly took the matter in his hands, preventing Rivaille to act further. He gave a nod when the two boys nod mutely and motioned them to follow him towards the infirmary. Rivaille sent both of them a murderous glare and walked, tailing them in silence, biting all the insults inside.

"Arlelt, can you find the janitor to clean up this mess? Thank you." Irvin called out to the blonde to take charge before he left. Armin quickly did as he was told while the three of them walked away.

* * *

Hanji, the school doctor and the science teacher was gaping at the drenched boys and teacher. She covered her mouth, trying to stop herself from laughing out loud, much to Rivaille's annoyance.

"I guess all of you need new fresh clothes, huh? I'm sorry, Rivaille, I'm afraid that we only have a long sport pants, but we got several clean uniforms. Which one do you prefer?"

"It doesn't matter, Hanji. Just give me the damn clothes and pants." Rivaille growled at her and start unbuttoning his wet shirt. Both Eren and Jean, who picked the clothes given by Hanji, gulped when she was grinning madly at them.

"Here's your clothes Rivaille… and we'll just walk out as you guys change clothes." She said, quickly walking away from the scene, pulling Irvin along with her to find out what exactly had happened. Jean breathed out a curse and walked toward the back of the curtain. Eren padded over to lock the door just in case somebody walked in. He then started putting the clothes on top of the desk and quickly unbuttoning his own uniform. He just hoped that his blazer will dry out as soon as possible. It would be extremely cold when he walked home with the drenched blazer, not to mention the weather was getting colder nowadays. He shivered in horror when he imagined Mikasa's face once she found out he got into a fight and a detention only by the wet blazer as evidence.

As he raised his head, Eren's eyes widened at the sight of his teacher stripping before him near the empty bed, showing a muscular, well-trained body. His face turned scarlet red when he noticed himself gawking at the man stripping himself. He quickly threw his uniform on the floor and wore the new dry clothes, turning around from Rivaille in embarrassment. Being in the military surely made his body built in that way. Eren suddenly felt weak with his current condition, despite the fact that he participated in some sports recently. He hoped Rivaille did not catch him staring the man previously. Eren bit his lip, confused when he suddenly felt warm on his cheeks. _What the hell is this?!_

Rivaille eyed the boy's back from the corner of his eyes; he knew the brunet had been staring at his bare form. As he pushed down his trousers, Rivaille slowly wore the pants, cursing when it was a bit longer than his legs. He needed to fold the end of it up, much to his dismay. After buttoning up his clothes, he picked up his wet clothes and stared at Eren who still hadn't moved from the spot.

"Jaeger," The sound of his name made the boy jump and Rivaille raised a brow at the act. The brunet slowly turned around to look at him.

"I'm sorry, sir. For making you drenched."

"Sure, you do. Just don't forget the detention at lunch time later. Be sure to remind that friend of yours too." Rivaille nodded at the curtain, referring to Jean. Eren gave a silent nod as the man walked outside the door after he unlocked it, slamming it shut behind him. Eren let out a sigh and started to unbutton his uniform pants when Jean came out from the back of the curtain, scowling at him.

"I'm not going to have a detention if it's because of you." Jean said before he walked outside the room, ignoring the fact that Eren had his pants half-way down. Eren cursed under his breath when he heard the other slam the door.

"Says the one who started the fight." He stepped out of the pants and quickly slipped on the new one.

* * *

Armin looked at Eren, who groaned when the lesson had ended. It was time for lunch now, but he couldn't get any since he got a detention. He dully watched his classmates walked outside the room until Armin patted his shoulder, smiling down at him.

"I will buy you some lunch. Do you want anything?" Armin asked and Eren's eyes lit up.

"Just bring me some bread with salad in it." Armin gave a nod and waved at him as he walked outside the classroom. Jean was staring at the blonde, hissing at the fact that Eren still got his lunch after all what happened. Eren stood up to sit on the front desk to be closer to the teacher during detention.

"Damn you, Eren." Jean said cursing his luck. Eren frowned at the guy who sat a few desks away from him and propped his chin on his palm, smugly throwing him a winning smile.

"What? Are you jealous that Armin will buy me lunch?" Eren flashed him a big grin when Jean looked at him flabbergasted, not believing what he just heard.

"Why would I?!" the guy shouted at the same time as Rivaille appeared. Both looked at Rivaille who gave Jean a deadly glare at his shout, making him gulp in fear. They were expecting Irvin to take charge of their detention, but it seemed that Irvin had left it all to Rivaille to take over instead. The teacher walked towards the both of them and threw the clipped papers on their desks, looking bored.

"Finish this and you are free to go. You brats are making me miss my lunch. Don't you dare step out from this classroom while I'm gone." After he left, Eren and Jean quickly flipped the pages and found out there were 50 questions and answers for English lessons.

"This is insane!" Jean shouted and threw the paper loudly on the desk. Eren sighed frustratingly; he was surprised when Jean suddenly stood up to leave.

"Are you leaving?!" Eren said, standing up as well. Jean threw him a dirty look.

"What do you think?! This day couldn't get any worse. He's just an assistant teacher. I'm not taking him seriously!" Just like that, the taller guy walked out of the room, leaving Eren alone. Eren looked down at the paper and he groaned, sitting back down and started reading the first question. His eyes blinked when the question was easier than he thought. He picked up his pen and started filling in the answers, humming as he continued on the next questions; having Armin as his best friend really helped him with his studies. The door opened, and Rivaille brought a plastic bag of lunch in his hand, glaring at the empty seat and the left-alone paper, untouched.

"Where's the other one?" He asked as he slammed the plastic bag on the teacher's desk in irritation.

"Jean… he… went to the infirmary." Eren mumbled and Rivaille rolled his eyes. He couldn't believe that Eren was trying to cover his friend after what he had done to him.

"Don't lie to me, kid. As if I've never skipped my detention during high school. Stupid brat. Maybe I should make the both of you skip this lunch detention and return later after school instead?" Eren cringed, making Rivaille looked at him in the eyes. Green orbs met gray, Eren prepared for what's coming, objecting the teacher.

"I… I can't, sir. I'm sorry. Mikasa… my adopted sister is sick, so I have to take care of her." He said, half pleading him to let him go. Rivaille stared at him for a moment.

"Is that the reason why were you late this morning? Where's your mother? Father?" Rivaille asked, pulling the lunch box out from the plastic bag and un-wrapped the chopsticks. Eren gave a nod but Rivaille's expression did not change.

"My father is a doctor, sir. He went to work at dawn and gets home around midnight. Sometimes he goes outside the city and doesn't come home for a few days. My mother had passed away because of an illness, so there's no one in the house to take care of her." Rivaille shot him a look.

"Oh, my condolences," He muttered and Eren gave a small smile before nodding.

"You can go after you finished that paper. You are still staying here because of splashing the hallway with water." Eren couldn't help but chuckle when he heard him.

"Thank you, sir." Rivaille only nod and started eating after he mumbled 'itadakimasu'. He stopped halfway when he remembered something. Pulling another lunch from the bag, he threw it towards Eren.

"Here, brat, take it. I got extra." Eren was surprised when Rivaille suddenly threw it towards his directions. The sandwich wrapped in plastic made him swallow his saliva when he started drooling at the sight.

"Thank you, sir" Eren said happily, un-wrapping the sandwich. Rivaille stared at him for a moment before sighing.

"Stop calling me that. I know I'm a teacher here, but… just Rivaille is fine. I feel kind of old being called sir." Rivaille said, opening his mouth and started munching on his food. Eren's eyes stared at him surprise; he couldn't help but blush at how laidback the man was.

"Or Levi if you prefer," Rivaille said after swallowing, his eyes were now glued to Eren's emerald orbs who only gave a silent nod. He averted his eyes when Rivaille kept on staring at him, trying to act normal as he could while continuing to chew on his sandwich. He picked up his pen and carried on answering the paper sheets while he tried to concentrate on each question other than the man before him. He missed the frown that appeared on Rivaille's forehead.

* * *

Rivaille gave the paper to Irvin who took it with a smile on his face. Rivalle threw him an annoyed look. He was about to walk away when Irvin stopped him.

"Rivaille. You should consider listening to the students' cause as to why he or she is late."

"But then every student will make an excuse and get off from their punishment easily, Irvin." Rivaille put his arms on his back, standing before the man stiffly. Irvin frowned at him before running his hand through his hair. He turned around and placed the paper on his desk and sat down on the chair.

"This is not TE military, Rivaille. Besides, Eren had his reasons. His adoptive sister, Mikasa is sick. I've known the boy for long already. They are a good family. There's no one to take care of them when either of them is sick. His father sometimes has to go outside the city to work. Mikasa even got a part-time job and Eren usually helps around this school for a living too. Their mother had passed away five years ago and they are starting to get their life back to normal." Rivaille's expression did not change, but he clenched his wrist at the back.

"I will remember that." He said before turning around to leave. Irvin stared at his cousin and let out a sigh. Irvin turned to his desk, staring at the photo of his childhood friend, '_Petra, what should I do next?'_

As soon as the door on the office slammed shut, Rivaille brought his hand to his forehead, gritting his teeth. From the time he met the boy, and the time he saw his name in the absent book, he knew who he was. His lips slowly whispered the words that he had been holding inside.

"Eren… What happened…?" The teen did not seem to catch the hint he was giving him, including his name calling when he was little.

**TBC**

The drama starts from here! Mwahaha 8D Give me a review and I'll continue –is shoot-

ty for the review n.n -hugs all-


	4. Familiar

**Overwhelming Emotions**

**Genre: **Drama Romance AU Reincarnation

**Rating:** T

**Pairing: (mainly)** Rivaille x Eren

**_Summary: _**Being woven in his dreams and memories, Rivaille was at a loss. The second encounter with a certain boy made it even much worse than he thought it would be, especially when the boy is reaching his hands out to him again.

**Disclaimer: **

I don't own Shingeki no Kyojin, but this fanfiction is mine.

© AsakuraHannah on FFn

_**A/N: **This chp is un-beta. Sorry about that. but I tried to overlook the grammar. n.n_

**_Chapter 4 : Familiar_**

"I'm home." Eren opened the door and stepped inside. He pulled his shoes off and threw it aside carelessly. He was about to run to Mikasa's room when the girl suddenly appeared in the kitchen entrance.

"Eren, welcome back." Mikasa said with a smile.

"Mikasa, are you alright now? Why are you not resting? Is your fever gone already?" She gave a nod at his concern.

"I'm getting better after the whole day rest. Though I hope I will be fine for the tomorrow part-time job. I'm making dinner now. Did something happen today?" she asked as she walked back to the kitchen. Eren's mind drifting back to the event this morning which caused him to get a detention, he better not mentioned it to her. Eren followed her into the kitchen with a frown.

"Nothing happened, just the usual boring day. By the way, Armin made a copy of his notes for you." Eren brought his bag down and picked up a paper being photocopied and handed it to her.

"Thank you." She said and flipping through the thin bundle. She put the paper on the dinner table before walking back to stir the soup which started boiling. She stirred for a few times before she turned stove off and started preparing the plates.

"Mikasa, I don't think you should work just yet tomorrow…" Eren mumbled at her, she only remained silent. He gave a sigh, trying to think of some other thing to talk. Suddenly he remembered.

"Is dad going to go home early today?" Eren suddenly asked while picking up the already cooked rice from the big bowl, dividing it for him and Mikasa. Mikasa paused to look at him for a moment. As much as she was concerned Eren was so hard-headed. His brother just couldn't stop his curiosity.

"No, but I don't think you are supposed to walk into his room without permission, Eren. I mean, he always said that to you."

"I'm curious as to why can't I see it? Didn't he entrust that key to you? Can I go inside, Mikasa?" Eren said, his eyes were now sparkling with excitement.

"No." she said and turned back to taking out plates from the cabinet. Eren puckered his brow at her before sighing, he propped his chin on the palm of his hand and pouted.

"Armin told me on the other day that I was having a dream about my childhood memory. Say, Mikasa, do you remember the time when Armin's balloon stuck in a tree and I had climbed up to get it? Do you know about it? He said he did. Weird isn't it? I can't remember anything about it at all no matter how much I tried to. Not only that, there were several dreams that keep on nagging me." Eren watched as Mikasa shot him a look after she set the plate down on the table, eyes widening as her pupils were shaking on his question. Their eyes met for a moment before Mikasa gave a hesitant nod at him.

"I remember that. Maybe you just forget about it, Eren."

"But why I dream about it? I'm just curious." Mikasa put a plate and the soup before Eren and sat down on her seat across him.

"You only forget about it, Eren. It's nothing to worry about. It's not an excuse to come inside your dad's room anyway." Mikasa said while pouring the soup for her own. Eren stared at her, sighing before scratching his head in frustration.

"I felt like I'm missing something important! Maybe there are things I can find in there." He exclaimed and started pouring the soup after his sister was done with hers. Mikasa only stared at him blankly and started eating her dinner. Eren did not see the way she gripped her spoon harder than before.

* * *

Eren turned around to his side as he watched the outside moon from the window. He slowly sat up and crawled to get closer to the window, staring up at the sky. He brought his blankets around his body and leaned on the window sill and gave a loud sigh. What is it about his childhood memory? Lately he started dreaming about it and not once that could he remember it happened during his childhood. Eren noticed his breath against the window started to become a mist. The weather had turned colder than before. He leaned closer to the window and breathed out a warm air, making more mists on the glass pane. Once he was sure it's big enough for him to write on it, he pressed the tip of his forefinger across it, forming a wing. Eren stared at it for a moment before sighing; he moved some of the photo frames away so that he could bend his upper body on the window sill and put his head on top of his arms, staring at the dark sky. Before he knew his eyes were starting to drop. A single tear ran down his cheek as he drifted to sleep against the window with moonlight bathing him from above.

* * *

Mikasa looked at the door opened from outside, she slowly rose to her feet, walking towards the front door of the house.

"Father…" she called him, the man looked at her and gave a smile.

"Mikasa, I thought you were asleep already." He said, patting her on the shoulder after he closed the door and locked it. Mikasa raised her hands to help him with his jacket and bag. His father gave the things for her to take care of and both walked inside the house.

"Was there something you need?" Grisha asked her when she followed him towards his room. He unlocked the door and let her walk inside before him. Mikasa walked to the desk to light a candle to lighten up the room. Grisha watched her in silence as he closed the door, waiting for her to say anything.

"Eren asked me about his childhood memory." That sentence made Grisha looked at her astonished. Their eyes met for a moment before Grisha gave out a sigh.

"So that mean the boy is starting to remember… I see…" Grisha sat on the bed, clasping both hands as he look down on his feet. He put his elbows on top of her knees as he stared down in a deep thought.

"What he was asking is only his childhood memories though." Mikasa added, hearing Grisha gave a soft sigh again, nodding in understanding.

"Did something trigger that?" Mikasa shook her head. She frowned when a flash of the internship teacher suddenly appeared in her mind.

"We'll see where this will lead to. In the meantime, just have a close watch on him, Mikasa. Thank you for letting me know about it. You can take your rest now."

"I'll prepare a hot tea for you." Mikasa walked out of the room to let her father have some space to think. As soon as her daughter closed the door, Grisha looked at his desk. He rose to his feet and opened the drawer, taking an old book he kept away from his son. He flipped the book open and read through the pages. Some medical information was written in there along with the boy's pictures. He flipped through the pages once again and stopped on a certain blank page with only one photo pasted on it.

"I won't let him read this book if he hadn't regained full memories of him back. It would mean I'm forcing him to know what he wasn't supposed to remember." He whispered to the photo of a young boy with dark hair and gray emotionless eyes standing beside a seven year old Eren.

* * *

_Eren was awakened by the sound of laughter not far from him. He opened his eyes to find out that he was leaning against the tree; the book he had previously reading had fallen on his lap. It's Armin's book with lots of pictures of landscapes. He had become sleepy when he read the long article about the sea. He saw a familiar figure running up to him, calling out his name. He shielded his eyes from the sunlight above, trying to see clearly who was calling him. He heard his name being called out by the older boy._

"_Eren… Eren…"_

"Eren… Eren!" Mikasa shook him awake and Eren muffled a sound, stirring up. He winced when he started to move his body and felt an awful cramped on his nape. He must have been falling asleep in that position the whole night. Mikasa looked at him questioning.

"Mikasa? Are you healthy again now?" he mumbled sleepily, rubbing his right eyes.

"Why are you sleeping on the window sill like that? Anyway, we have a cleaning duty this morning. Let's get ready." Mikasa started leaving the room when Eren already woke up.

"Fine." He mumbled with a sore throat, still half asleep.

* * *

Armin waved at the siblings when he saw them walking down the road, heading in his direction.

"Good morning, Armin. You are always early." Mikasa said, earning a chuckle from the blonde.

"It's nice waking up early and read books with a fresh mind." Eren only gave a loud yawn at that.

"Not if the weather starting to get cold. I wish I was still inside a warm blanket, sleeping soundly." He brought his hand to cover his mouth as he gave another yawn. Mikasa rolled her eyes and Armin laughed at the complaints coming from Eren.

They started walking slowly towards their high school while chatting. Eren was always engrossed when listening to Armin's excited stories and Mikasa only listening to him in silence, nodding for a few times to let him know she was listening.

It was when they arrived at the school that they split way. As a morning routine, Armin would go to the library to return the borrowed books. Mikasa told Eren to go ahead on to the class as she took a few cleaning stuff from the storage room for their cleaning duty that morning. Her brother agreed and walked towards his classroom lazily. Eren let out a pretty loud yawn when he opened his classroom door and closed it carelessly. He sucked in his breath when he found out that he was not alone. There, stood the guy who threw a look at his manner of yawning loudly. Eren blushed at his act in front of his assistance teacher and gave a bow.

"Good Morning, Rivaille-sensei." He ran a hand to his head timidly when the guy shaking his head.

"Watch your manner, Jaeger." He mumbled and turned back to the blackboard and copied the student's name for their morning duty from the paper he was holding.

"I'm sorry." Eren said as he walked toward his sit and put his bag on top of the desk.

"Jaeger, who was the one cleaning my desk yesterday morning?" Rivaille asked after he put the chalk down and patting his hands together, allowing the dust fallen off his hands. Eren turned around, mind racing to think before he shook his head. Rivaille took a wet tissue from his pocket pants and wiping his hand clean while waiting for the boy to answer him.

"I don't remember. Why is it?" He asked and walked toward the desk. Rivaille stared at him for a moment and pointed to the table, making Eren's eyes following his finger. Indeed, there were some water spots on the table which had turned dry. The person who wiped the table must have used overly wet fabric and leave it just like that.

"This table is so unclean. Go tell the students who were cleaning yesterday that they are not doing a pretty well done." He said, crossing his arms. Eren gave a nod at it, gulping when his dark eyes were staring at him closely.

"Right, sir." Eren replied shortly. Rivaille threw him a glare until Eren remembered the way he was supposed to call him.

"Rivaille-san." He corrected, not leaving out the polite way to call the older guy.

"Now, why don't you go do something about this? I mean it's rare that you come here at this hour, as I recall."

"Me?" Eren pointed his forefinger to himself, unsure that the Internship teacher was ordering him to clean the table. The frowned formed on his forehead and Eren sweat-dropping in fear.

"Yes, who else in this class other than you? It's your duty to clean today, right?" Eren bit his tongue to prevent himself letting out a groan when Rivaille pointed at the blackboard. Rivaille stared at the table once again and clicked his tongue before walking outside the classroom with full of irritation all over his face. The man walked outside the room and closed the door shut.

"Alright." Eren mumbled, watching the guy walked outside the room.

When Mikasa marched inside the classroom with cleaning utilities in her hands, Eren huffed at his luck.

"Mikasa, do you remember who were cleaning this room yesterday morning?" Mikasa gazed at him puzzled as she brought her finger to her chin, thinking.

"It's Sasha and Connie." Eren had to hold back his laughter at the names. He should have known. Last time he was having cleaning duties after school with them, both of them were having a war play with the broom and mop, making water splashing everywhere.

"No wonder. Maybe you should change the team duties for the morning. Rivaille Sensei just complained about how _unclean_ this table was." He said while wiping the table with much force. Mikasa gave him a tired look and grunted in response.

* * *

Armin raised his head when he met his teacher, standing in front of him when he was about to walk out from the library. Rivaille had his arms crossed and staring at the blond who was slightly taller than him. It was still morning and the school was still empty with not many students, unless some who got their cleaning duty for the day. Armin bit his lips when their eyes met, he was uncertain if he should greet him. The first time Armin saw the man, he was skeptical if Rivaille was the boy he knew very well. Averting his eyes from those gray emotionless eyes, Armin looked down. _'What is he doing here?'_

"You are… Armin, right?" Rivaille was the first to speak up, waiting for an answer. Armin clenched his hands tightly on his bag's handle before he gave a nod.

"Yes… Sir."

"I've been wondering for a while now. You guys seemed so close yet so distant at the same time. Care to explain to me about Jaeger?" Rivaille immediately asked to the point. Armin's eyes widened when he heard him. He shoots him a surprised look before swallowing his saliva down his throat.

"You are… Levi-san…?" He whispered, blue eyes trembling when the guy stood up straight now, both hands on the sides as he gave a nod.

"Long time, no see… Armin" Rivaille clenched his fists when his chest felt a pang of guilt. Armin's mind running wild, wondering if he should tell the truth about Eren.

"What do you want to know about, Levi-san?" Rivaille eyes never leaving him creeping the boy out.

"Eren… doesn't seem to remember me, does he?" Rivaille's voice came out whispering that Armin almost can't hear him for real. Armin gritted his teeth at the questioner and he clenched his eyes tight.

"I'm sorry, but… there nothing I can tell you! Nor that you ought to give Eren any explanation! Now if you will excuse me!" Armin shouted and gave a bow before he quickly ran passed the man. _I'm sorry I can't tell you, not after what happened._

"Armin!" Rivaille shouted at his name, but Armin had run off into the building. Rivaille clenched his trembling fist and punched a nearby wall in frustration.

'_What the hell is happening?!'_ Rivaille turned around angrily, walking away from the library.

* * *

"Armin?" Eren called out as quietly as possible, frowning as he looked around in the library. He had finished his morning duty and decided to kill time with reading along with his best friend. Much to his disappointment, the blonde was nowhere to be found. His eyes passed the large window pane and looked outside. As Eren stared outside, he saw a guy standing before the vending machine near the building. It took him a moment to realize that it was Rivaille before deciding to go outside the library to talk to the teacher.

"Rivaille-san…" he mumbled to himself when he remembered the way he should be calling him. Eren bit his lower lip at the memory. He pushed the door open; his legs brought him to run as soon as he was outside.

The teacher who crouching down to take the hot drink from the inside the box looked up when he heard footsteps running after his directions. He slowly stood up when the boy stopped directly in front of him.

"Rivaille-san." Rivaille stared at him for a moment of silence and clicked his tongue. He leaned against the wall and opened the can.

"Finished with your duty?" He said, not looking at the boy who was now looking up at the drinks on the vending machine.

"Yup." Eren said while clicking on of the drink's name after he latched a coin inside. Rivaille looked at the boy crouching down and stick his hand inside the bar to get the fallen drink.

"Have you cleaned my desk thoroughly?" he asked, taking a sip of the drink by holding his three fingers on the upper side of the can. Eren couldn't help but to chuckle when he heard the question. He got up from his crouching position, smiling at him.

"I did clean it, as clean as possible." He said, making Rivaille scoffed at him. That grinning face, he couldn't help but to think of that small boy who used to cling all the time when he was little.

"Say, Jaeger. Have you ever felt the nostalgic feeling towards someone?" Rivaille asked, meeting his green eyes with his gray eyes. The boy only stared at him for a moment before running his forefinger on his cheek, thinking.

"I do feel some kind of familiar feeling. But it's probably because we're in the same town for a long time? Who knows?" Eren said chuckling. His hands fumbling on the warm can, cracking it open and took a big gulp. Rivaille could only stare at him, not sure what to say. He also took another gulp before walked away from him with a sigh.

"Idiot. What an airhead. You never change" He muttered, earning a puzzled look from Eren.

"Sorry?" Rivaille waved his hand, dismissing him from saying anything further.

"Just go back to the library and read something useful." He ordered and disappeared into the building leaving Eren scratched his head in confusion.

'_What a pity. Why do I have to meet you again, now? I thought I've found you, but I lost you once again' _Rivaille grimaced at the thought. His eyes became sharper as he headed back to the building. He hated to admit that Mikasa is the only one he should ask about Eren.

**TBC**

**The strips goes here: **

**asakuranohana[.[deviantart[.[com /art /Overwhelm-Emotions-Chp4-388903741?id=4aq8uz6h5x**

ty for the reviews! Reviews are so much appreciated xD They are encourage me to go on.

Next chapter, will have some details of what happened.


	5. Past Life

**Overwhelming Emotions**

**Genre: **Drama Romance AU Reincarnation

**Rating:** T

**Pairing: (mainly)** Rivaille x Eren

**_Summary: _**Being woven in his dreams and memories, Rivaille was at a loss. The second encounter with a certain boy made it even much worse than he thought it would be, especially when the boy is reaching his hands out to him again.

**Disclaimer: **

I don't own Shingeki no Kyojin, but this fanfiction is mine.

©AsakuraHannah at FFn

**Ty for xryuchan27 for beta read this :D**

**_Chapter 5 : Past Life_**

Armin was running towards his classroom with a panic expression plastered on his face. The question from Rivaille won't stop echoing in his ears as he continued running towards his classroom.

_"Eren… doesn't seem to remember me, does he?"_

Mikasa threw a surprised look at Armin who tried to catch his breath as soon as he arrived in the classroom with a loud thud. His hand clenched the door tightly after he banged it open.

"Armin? What happened? You look pale." She said in concern, pulling her red scarf to loosen it off from around her nose. The dust was everywhere and she had to use her scarf for protection over it. Now that her duty was finished, she pulled the scarf loose. She was about to relax herself in the empty classroom when Armin suddenly burst inside completely out of breath.

"Mikasa! He is… Levi is here. I mean. He…is Rivaille! Have you noticed him?" Armin spilled all out in one breath, he sounded almost desperate. Mikasa almost dropped the scarf she was holding when realization dawn on her.

"Armin. What are you talking about? Explain it to me slowly." Mikasa's heart started beating faster. True, she had a familiar feeling towards the raven-haired man, but she did not think further of him. Armin gave her a firm nod, walking toward her in a hasty pace. She knew what he was talking about.

"I met him just now in front of the library, he suddenly asked me about Eren_._ Mikasa, should we tell him about what happened to Eren? I mean…" Armin stopped when Mikasa put her hand on his shoulder, calming him down.

"Calm down. No wonder he seemed familiar to me. Why is he here anyway? Didn't he move to France a long time ago?" Armin noticed Mikasa clenched her fist enough to draw blood. He could feel the hand on his shoulder tightened as her expression darkened.

"I said to him that there's nothing to explain. I'm not even sure if he will leave it just like that." Armin looked back at the entrance of the classroom; afraid that the man would suddenly appear behind them. Mikasa gave him a nod.

"Good choice, Armin. Let's just leave him wondering. I don't want him to come to Eren and start hurting him again. After all he had done and all those dreamlike stories… That _freedom wings_ almost took Eren's life away. That man is full of lies." Mikasa bit her lips at the memory, she hated that man completely. She almost lost her only brother because of him.

"Full of lies?" A voice spoke from behind making them turn sharply to the door. Rivaille was staring at both of them with tired eyes, and slowly walked towards them, eyes never leaving Mikasa's. He fully ignored the girl's fierce look, moving his face only a few inches from her. Their eyes were cynical at each other making Armin back away.

"Are you still into it now, Ackerman? Seeing all of those dreams of mine as _lies_?" Rivaille glared daggers at her when the girl did not seem to move back in fear.

"What are you doing here, midget. Why are you here for? I thought you had enough in the past, torturing Eren with your dreamlike stories. Nobody believes your stories other than Eren. Now you are here to hurt him again!"

"Go ahead; keep talking and I won't hesitate to do anything painful to you, Ackerman." Mikasa gritted her teeth when she heard him.

"What are you going to do, _Levi_? Punch me in the face? Kick me in my stomach? Those kinds of things will make your internship turn into a living hell." Mikasa smirked at him when he stared at her callously.

"Both of you please calm down!" Armin quickly pulled her away, wishing that Mikasa would stop provoking the man. Rivaille stayed still, staring at them before he gave out a loud sigh. Talking to her will never be peaceful.

"Explain to me about Eren. What the hell is wrong with him? He doesn't seem to recognize me even for a bit!" he quickly asked the question that had been nagging him before she started another fight. Both Mikasa and Armin avoided eye-contact from him, infuriating the shorter man even more. Thinking that they would dodge the question, he opened his mouth only to shut it again when Mikasa finally spoke up.

"Eren lost his childhood memory." Rivaille's eyes widened when he heard her.

"What?" his voice sounds like a husky whispered as his features turned pale.

"It's your entire fault! What are those freedom wings about?! After that accident you move to France as if nothing happened. You didn't even take responsibility on Eren's injuries! Don't come near him again!" Mikasa tried to compose herself from shouting at the raven-haired man in front of her, eyes getting red as she tried to hold her tears back. Rivaille stared at her stunned; he doesn't know how to react.

"I didn't mean to walk away… I didn't even know-"

"Just go away for now." Armin cut him, grimacing when Rivaille shifted his eyes to glare at the blonde. The teacher took the hint when Armin shook his head, eyes shifting from Mikasa and Rivaille. His blue eyes showing confidence in his look that Rivaille had to back down. He turned around and walked away from the raging girl. When he reached the entrance of the classroom, Rivaille looked back at them one more time. Mikasa was still glaring at him with full of rage.

"Just so you know, you and Armin were also there in those _dreams of lies_. Both of you were such a good and skillful inferior soldiers." Rivaille said before leaving the two of them alone.

* * *

"Rivaille." Irvin called out when Rivaille entered the office, looking gloomy. The man noticed the change of expression when his cousin raised his head to look at him.

"What's wrong?" he asked in concern. He was surprised when Rivaille avoided eye contact with him.

"Nothing is wrong… Just some brat being stupid." Rivaille said as he sat on the chair, crossing his arms. His mind couldn't think about what had happened just now. He stared at his right palm, the one he used for punching the wall. Rivaille clenched his hand into a fist in anger. He was unaware that Hanji and Irvin had been watching him closely.

_"Eren lost his childhood memory."_ Childhood memory… accident… Rivaille ran his palms across his face in frustration. _Does that mean that the boy also lost his past life memories during the accident?_ Rivaille pinched the bridge of his nose, too many things was running into his mind. He lost track of time until the bell went off indicating the start of lessons, breaking his cluttered thoughts.

"Rivaille…"

"I know. I will check the attendance again this morning." Rivaille said and got up from his seat.

"It's my lesson after the homeroom. I will do a lot of experiments today with the students." Hanji said, humming happily as she followed Rivaille outside. Before they left, Hanji glanced at Irvin who was staying silent, eyes never leaving his cousin. She gave a knowing nod at him, reassuring the man and closed the door behind her.

Both of them walked in silence, each step accompanied by the humming sounds coming from Hanji. When Rivaille stopped walking, Hanji stopped humming and stared at him in wonder.

"Rivaille, if there's something bothering you, you can talk to me if you want to." Hanji said, putting her hands on the back of her waist, smiling at him when the younger man looked at her.

"Hanji… do you… believe in past life…?" Rivaille gazed at her from the corner of his eyes, brows furrowed when Hanji chuckled at his question.

"What a weird question. Why all of the sudden? Did something happen?" Rivaille huffed after Hanji asked his question with another and continued walking towards the classroom. She followed his every movement in silence, wondering if she should tell Irvin about Rivaille's question earlier.

* * *

Armin was waiting for both of his friends patiently for their lunch time. His eyes were staring at Marco, who stood at the entrance of the classroom, waiting for Jean to follow him. Armin stared at them for a moment until Eren called him.

"Amin?" Eren asked him in worry. Armin quickly whipped his head; he gave him a nervous smile.

"Let's go have lunch." Armin gave an awkward nod, following his friends when they started heading outside the classroom.

"Eren! Mikasa! Armin!" Sasha waved at them when she saw them walking towards their direction. The three of them quickly join her and the group for lunch.

They were sitting on the field behind the canteen, spreading their lunch boxes for shares when Eren spotted the two lunch boxes in front of him.

"Wow, are you the one who made this, Sasha?" Eren asked in amazement when he looked down at the lunch boxes full of fancy meals. Connie laughed at him.

"No way, it's Annie's." He said while taking the egg-roll with his chopstick. All eyes were at Annie before she coughed in embarrassment.

"You may take some if you want." All of them then stuffed their mouth with the fancy meals merrily when she gave permission.

"You'll be a good wife, Annie." Reiner chuckled as he tasted the food.

"Is that a proposal?" Eren threw him a big grin and Reiner spluttered. Sasha laughed out loud as food splattered out from her mouth, making Connie shriek in disgust.

"Watch your manner!" he reprimanded her.

"What are you talking about, Eren?!" Reiner's face was strangely pale as he looked at the glowering Berthold from the corner of his eyes.

"Shut your mouth and eat, midget." Jean spat directed to Eren while hovering his fork over Annie's lunchbox. Armin, who was about to take the sausage almost crashed on Jean's fork, the blonde quickly withdrew as he sucked in his breath.

"Go ahead if you want it." Jean said, nodding on Armin. Armin gave a mute nod and took it. Eren rolled his eyes when he watched the two. He gritted his teeth when Marco called Jean and offered his lunchbox for Jean to take some too. Jean happily complied, making Eren bite on his spoon angrily. _Take the hint, idiot!_ He was surprised when Mikasa nudged his side painfully with her elbow, emitting a painful choking sound.

"Keep eating, we don't have much time." Mikasa reprimanded, stopping Eren from letting out another nasty word to Jean. Eren munched grimly. He really wanted his best friend to search for someone else worth his smart mind other than the idiot who loves to pick a fight.

It was after lunch time when the group walked back to their next class. Eren told his friends to go ahead with their class as he needed to go to the restroom first to do his stuff. Armin gave their lunch boxes for Mikasa to bring it into the classroom along with hers and followed Eren.

As soon as they arrived inside the restroom, Armin walked into the stall while Eren walked to the sink and splashed his face with cold water several times. He took a few tissues to dry his face after turning the tap water off. Eren stared at his reflection in the mirror for a moment when suddenly a scene reappeared in his mind.

_"Say, Jaeger. Have you ever felt nostalgic feeling towards someone?" _Erin frowned at the memory. He shook his head, no matter how much he tried to remember, he just couldn't. It was true that he felt a familiar feeling when he met the man at first. But now… Everything seemed so fuzzy. Was it had to do with his childhood memory?

"Eren?" Eren was surprised when he saw Armin had finished his stuff and was staring at him in wonder. The brunette gave him a nervous laugh and threw the tissue into the trash can.

"Armin… do you remember almost everything during your childhood?" Eren's question made Armin's eyes gleam in anxiousness. He looked into those green eyes for a moment before Eren broke the contact.

"Let's go to class." He said, ignoring his unanswered question. Eren was starting to get tired of his friends avoiding his questions. He knew from the look the blonde gave him, he would avoid the question again. The brunette glared down as he walked faster with Armin tailing him behind in silence.

Both of them were about to turn to the left corner when Eren spotted Rivaille with Irvin in the hallway. He frowned at the tension between them and slowly leaned against the wall, trying to listen to their conversation. He was curious about their relationship and motioned for Armin to stay quiet. Armin shut his mouth, swallowing his protests, afraid if they find out they were eavesdropping.

"Hanji told me your question." At that fact, Rivaille scowled. He did not move an inch when Irvin took a step closer to the shorter man.

"Rivaille, I thought I told you numerous times already. That past life thing is-"

"Crazy, I know. Enough." Rivaille said and attempted to walk away, but Irvin insisted to continue.

"You are not a child anymore, Rivaille."

"I know that. Stop it already."

"No, we need to do something about your… hallucination." Irvin stopped when Rivaille threw him a glare.

"Why is it that you can't listen to me without mocking me?! Why could Petra listen to me intently while you couldn't?"

"At that time you were at a loss because of your friend's accident. She listened to everything of your story so you could return to being yourself and go on with your life. You are fifteen that time, now you are 23."

"Are you telling me that all of those dreams I got were full of lies? Tell me if you can handle those entire crazy dreams about me killing giants, monsters, and have to see those blood splattering around, Irvin! Watching all of my comrades dying on me almost every night while I'm their superior and can't do anything! The fact that I can't even save the one I love is maddening. I don't even know what I'm supposed to do with all of those… dreams…" Rivaille's fists trembled with rage. Eren looked at Rivaille in worry.

_'Past life? Dreams?' _Eren's hand clutched his temple as his head started aching painfully. Armin shifted his glance to Eren in worry, wondering if they should just take another path towards their classroom. His face turned into concern when he saw the pain in Eren's features.

"You don't know how painful it was to watch those… memories…" Rivaille whispered to his cousin, hoping that Irvin at least understand. The man only stayed silent, watching him with pity. Rivaille threw him an obnoxious glare, fully hated the look Irvin was giving him.

"It was that doctor that told you, wasn't it? He told you that those dreams you were having were past life memory, didn't he?"

"Yes…" he said shortly. Irvin scratched his head with a loud sigh.

"Didn't you go to a different doctor after that, Rivaille? Sure enough there must be something weird with that doctor." Irvin crossed his arms with a funny face. Rivaille felt the need to punch the man in the face right after those words he threw at him. He clenched his fists to prevent him from doing so.

"That doctor is… Jaeger's father…" Rivaille whispered making Irvin stare at him, surprised. A loud shout made the both of them look from behind.

"Eren!" Armin shouted, holding his friend when he almost toppled over. Rivaille's eyes widened when he saw Eren not far from them, listening to their conversation. Irvin stared at the boys for a moment, not knowing what to do before Eren stepped back. Both of them watched in anxiety when Eren was looking very pale while clutching his temple.

"I… I'm sorry… we were just getting back from the restroom and…" Eren gave a short breath, trying to clear his vision when everything is getting blurry. Both teachers startled when Eren suddenly fell on his knees.

"Eren!" Armin shouted when Eren fell face first on the floor.

"We shouldn't have the talk here. I'm sorry." Irvin said. Rivaille gave him a look before clicking his tongue, walking over to Eren when Armin managed to flip him on his back.

"You really love to make me clean all the mess, old man." Rivaille grimaced while kneeling down before Eren. Armin watched as the man easily lifted up his friend in his arms bridal style. His face flushed at the scene before looking away.

"I will call Mikasa." Armin said, knowing very much that this should be informed to Eren's sister. As he hurriedly ran toward the classroom, Rivaille headed towards the infirmary leaded by Irvin. Staring sadly at the boy in his arms, he wondered just how much the boy had heard about the conversation. Rivaille stopped his steps when Irvin had turned to the right corner. Like a ritual, he brought his lips on Eren's forehead, kissing him lightly, and then he went down to kiss the tip of his nose then to his cheek. His lips hovered on the boy's chapped lips, pausing before he decided to stop there. He continued walking towards the infirmary with an unreadable expression.

* * *

_Ah… This feels warm… Eren slowly opened his eyes, he felt like he was being sucked into the blinding light. He felt warm arms hugging him closely to his chest. When Eren looked up, he saw a blurry vision of someone staring down at him desperately. He suddenly felt so lifeless while the person continued embracing him tightly. Was it tears he was seeing? As the man slowly brought his face closer, Eren could see a track of blood on his cheek. He couldn't do anything to stop him from kissing his forehead, then to his nose and cheek. He stared when the man moved down to press his lips against his. He heard himself whisper something like a title calling._

_"Corporal" He felt darkness engulfed him before he was about to taste those lips._

_"Eren." His voice sounded familiar._

"Eren."

Eren slowly opened his green eyes. A blurry image of his sister and best friend turned clear after blinking a few times, and slowly propped himself to sit.

"Where am I?" Eren muttered, earning a happy exclamation from both Mikasa and Armin.

"Eren! Are you alright?" Armin asked.

"Can you remember me, Eren?" Mikasa asked. Her expression changed from worry to relief when Eren nodded mutely.

"Are you alright now?" A face appeared from behind the curtain, Hanji looked down at the boy in worry.

"Hanji Sensei…" Eren sat up properly when he saw her drawing the curtain open.

"You suddenly fainted in the hallway. I've checked your blood and vital points, you're alright. Nothing is wrong with you. What were you feeling before you fainted?" Hanji asked, while taking Eren's wrist, checking his pulse once again. Eren stared at her before looking down. He wasn't sure if he should tell her about Rivaille and Irvin's conversation.

"I felt a terrible headache before I blacked out." Eren murmured.

"I see… can you stand up? Do you want to go home? You'll need a lot of rest"

"Can I take a rest here until the end of the lesson?" Eren asked. He was glad that Hanji approved.

"Okay, both of you should go to your last lesson. I will be right back." Hanji told Armin and Mikasa and left the room.

"Eren, how are you feeling? I'm surprised when I saw Rivaille-san carried you in his arms." Armin said making Eren flabbergasted.

"What?! Carried me in his arms?" he was blushing deeply when he heard him. Mikasa sighed at his reaction.

"You really made both of us worried. I thought something bad happened. You can't possibly caught my cold, can you?" Mikasa said, putting her palm on top of Eren's hand.

"I'm alright now. I'll take a bit of rest here. Just come here when the lesson finished and we'll walk home together." Mikasa nodded at him and pulled Armin away with her. When they walked outside the room, both of them found Rivaille leaning against the wall with his arms crossed over his chest. Mikasa glared at him but she didn't say anything when Armin pulled her along with him; back towards their class. Rivaille ignored her glare and walked inside the room. As soon as he was inside, he walked towards the bed, looking down at the brunet who blinked at him in surprise when he saw his teacher. A dusty pink colored his cheeks; his eyes glistened in shame when their eyes met. The fact that the teacher had carried him in his arms when Eren fainted was embarrassing enough.

"Are you alright? Hanji told me that you've regained consciousness." Rivaille asked with a soft tone. Eren tried to sit up but Rivaille stopped him.

"Just lay down." Rivaille pulled the chair to sit beside the bed, and sat down with his eyes on the floor.

"I'm alright, Sir." Eren said, as green eyes curiously looked into Rivaille's face.

"I told you not to call me that. How much have you heard?" That question was reminding Eren the conversation from earlier. Eren remained silent at that.

"Almost everything." Rivaille raised his head to look at him. Both of them were staring at each other until Rivaille gave a soft snort.

"It must be weird for you to listen to that…" Rivaille shook his head.

"Do you know about my father?" Eren asked him with a frown.

"More or less… yes. When I was little, we met often. I was your father's patient that time, being threatened because of my… weird hallucination… past life if you must know." Rivaille said, fiddling with his fingers.

"How come I don't remember that?" Eren ran his hand on his temple, closing his eyes in frustration. Rivaille stared at him, unsure of what he was supposed to say to that. _You lost your memory. Didn't Mikasa and Armin tell you that?_

"I was wondering about that too. You did not seem to recognize me." _Let alone about your own past life memories._

"I don't recall anything at all from my childhood. I don't know what happened… But I dream some things." Hearing that statement, Rivaille immediately pulled Eren's arm, yanking him to make him look into his eyes.

"What kind of dream? Tell me!" Eren winced at the painful grip on his arm.

"Rivaille-san, it hurts." Rivaille's hand twitched for a second before letting go of him abruptly.

"I'm sorry…" he whispered. He doesn't know what to do anymore. Eren doesn't remember anything. Was it all just a dream? Their childhood memories slowly fading away as the time passed by; even Irvin had told him it was childish to clutch on the past memories. But he felt relieved when someone actually listened to his stories, Petra had been so kind. Rivaille felt his heart clenched painfully, remembering that she no longer exist in both worlds. His gray eyes stared into those green eyes of Eren's. Just when Rivaille thought everything had shattered and broken, Eren's sentences made him stare in shock.

"Tell me about that past life. Make me remember." Eren said, looking at him resolutely. Rivaille's pupils trembled when he felt a wash of nostalgic emotions painfully hit him in his chest. It was overwhelming.

_"Levi, tell me again about the stories. All about it!" A small child with green eyes ordered him. Rivaille could only smirk down at him. 'You were my underling during that time, how dare you order your superior like that?' He brought his hand to pat on the brunet's hair._

_"I will tell you so much more about it, Eren!" Levi said, kneeling down on the ground so that they could be on eye level. Eren gave an excited nod, grinning wildly._

Rivaille cupped his mouth to prevent himself from breaking down in front of the boy. Eren quickly sat up, staring at him in worry.

"I will tell you much more about it… Eren." He whispered, clutching his hand tightly. Eren gave him a small smile; he put his other hand on top of Rivaille's, soothing him down. He didn't know why, but he needed to make the man's sadness go away.

**_TBC_**

;_; I was typing the last scene when the OST 'Call your name' started.


	6. Petra

**Overwhelming Emotions**

**Genre: **Drama Romance AU Reincarnation

**Rating:** T

**Pairing: (mainly)** Rivaille x Eren

_**Summary: **_Being woven in his dreams and memories, Rivaille was at a loss. The second encounter with a certain boy made it even much worse than he thought it would be, especially when the boy is reaching his hands out to him again.

**Disclaimer: **

I don't own Shingeki no Kyojin, but this fanfiction is mine.

© AsakuraHannah on FFn

_**Chapter 6 : Petra**_

_"Just so you know, you and Armin were also there in those __dreams of lies__. Both of you were such a good and skillful inferior soldiers."_

Armin stared blankly at his notebook, unaware that his grandfather had been watching him from the side. Finally deciding to break his grandson's thought away, whatever the cause is, the old man was sure the he needed to spill them out.

"Armin, what has been bothering you?" Armin jumped when he was questioned, and whipped his head to the side to look at his grandfather in the eyes.

"I'm sorry, I spaced out, grandpa." He sighed and returned to write down on his notebook again, copying the answers from his textbook. He was doing his homework when his thoughts drifted to the previous event in the school this morning. He found out who the internship teacher was, the way he tried to avoid the conversation with the man, the way he told Mikasa about what happened. Everything happened too fast for his liking, his mind needed some rest. Armin gripped his mechanical pencil he was using tightly, a frown forming on his forehead. Again, his grandfather saw this and shook his head.

"If you want to talk about it, I don't mind listening, Armin." Armin raised his eyes timidly at him.

"Grandpa… do you believe in past life? As in… reincarnation?" Armin asked, feeling his cheeks getting warmer as he spilled out what he has been thinking about. His grandfather blinked at the question, his body leaned closer to the boy to stare into his eyes.

"Well, it all depends on each person and the way they see things around them. Some say previous lives means childhood memories that had been forgotten. Some say they were actually just a dream which were unreal. What matters is the way we handle the situation. In the end it's our choice to move forward and not let ourselves be tied up by the past." Armin watched as his grandfather put a forefinger and a thumb on his chin, thinking. His blue eyes shifted back down to the book in front of him, staring at the text without actually reading anything.

"What if… what if that person decided to be tied up in his past and let the people he knew dearly from the previous life to be tied with him again?" Amin's hands were now trembling as he imagined what kind of answer his grandfather would give him.

"It is up to that person if he wanted his beloved to be happy in this world or not." Armin stared at him in silence, he wasn't sure if the answer was a good thing or a bad thing. The blonde looked down on his textbook. Seeing no other things the blonde wanting to talk about anymore, his grandfather lets him have his time to think. He slowly got up from his seat and pats Armin on his shoulder.

"I'm going to sleep now. Don't be too late, Armin." He said, reminding him that it's almost midnight. Armin nodded at him with a small smile gracing his lips.

"Good night, Grandpa." He said as he stretched and yawned, his body was already yearning to lie down on a soft comfy bed. Armin closed his notebook and gathered the things on the table. He should head to bed as well. He needed to return the book tomorrow morning, again, after all. He stopped when he remembered the scene in the library from the other day. That time he was walking passed the library after buying Eren his lunch during his detention, he almost crashed on Jean on his way back. The taller guy was surprised when Armin ran towards him in a hurry.

"_Armin, what…"_

"_I'm sorry, are you alright?"_

"_I'm okay, but… that bread… Eren's?" Armin looked down at the bread he had dropped._

"_Yes." Armin stared at it. Jean nervously rubbed the back of his neck, unsure what to do._

"_I… I will pay for it. I'm sorry."_

"_Eh? It's okay."_

"_Just take the money." Jean thrusts the payment for the bread he had spoiled to the blonde's hands, even though it was an accident. Armin felt his fingers brushed against his palm lightly. He stared at the money as Jean walked away. He felt his cheeks getting warmer as he could still feel the lingering sensation of Jean's fingertips on his palm._

Armin flinched in surprise when he dropped the pencil he was holding, breaking his thoughts. His face flushed in embarrassment and he quickly shook his head. Jean had Marco already, he won't stand a chance! Armin quickly gathered the things that he would need to bring in tomorrow lessons and switched off the light. He brought one book upstairs to his room to read the last chapter before he goes to sleep.

* * *

Eren stared at the ceiling in silence; he put the back of his hand on top of his forehead, thinking back on what had happened this evening. The conversation he had with his teacher, the way the man frowned with his head down in deep sorrow, the way Rivaille grip his hand tightly, asking about his condition. Eren bit his lower lip; he suddenly felt his face flushed at the memory. What a weird feeling he was having towards the man. He knew he shouldn't have felt like that but he couldn't help having an attachment towards him after what happened in the infirmary. Eren closed his eyes tightly, imagining the way Rivaille looked at him when the he said those words.

"_Tell me about that past life. Make me remember."_

Flushing brightly at his own words, Eren turned to his side.

"Damn, how embarrassing." He muttered to himself. He remembered the way Rivaille had called his name.

"_I will tell you much more about it… Eren." _Instead of Jaeger, Rivaille had called him Eren. Eren brought his fingers towards his mouth, biting his nail when his face grew even warmer than before. He shook his head, forcing his mind to think about something else otherwise he wouldn't be able to have his sleep soon.

The way home was pretty tiring while he felt light-headed after fainting. Mikasa had been asking him if he was okay numerous times during their way back. She finally stopped after they arrived home and forcing Eren to immediately lie down on his bed.

When Mikasa walked in to the infirmary room, she was shocked to find out that they were holding hands. Eren quickly snatched his hand away with a red face, earning a grumble from Rivaille. He wasn't sure if the man felt annoyed with the interruption or because Eren had snatched his hand away. Mikasa was already glaring daggers at him; it was enough for Eren to pull her away from Rivaille's sight as soon as possible.

Eren growled when his mind wouldn't stop thinking. No, moreover, it won't let him stop thinking about Rivaille. He pulled the blanket up to his head, forcing himself to sleep.

* * *

_A boy around the age of fifteen ran towards the sleeping boy underneath the tree. In his hand was a sketchbook that he used to bring everywhere he goes. A raven-haired boy called out his name._

"_Eren… Eren!" watching those green eyes starting to open, blinking a few times to look at the older boy heading towards him. Eren rubbed his eyes sleepily._

"_Levi-san…" he called his name as Levi comfortably sat beside him. The boy stared down at him, giving him the sketch book for Eren to look._

"_Do you remember these wings?" Rivaille showed him a sketch of wings overlapping with blue and white color. It had a pentagon symbol at the back of the wings. Those green eyes lightened when he showed Eren the symbol. Eren brought the sketch book closer to his eyes to examine it closely. He gave a nod, his pupils trembling at the flash of memory._

"_This is…" Rivaille nodded, he felt a wash of happiness in his chest when the boy acknowledged it._

"_Freedom Wings. These were our symbol in the Scouting Legion that time. Do you remember?" He said giving the details to him. The boy's smile widened for a moment before his facial expression changed. Eren quickly brushed his tears when it falls down on his cheek. Rivaille quickly pats his head._

"_Eren, don't cry…" he whispered._

"_I felt so sad all of a sudden." Hearing that, Rivaille gave a knowing smile. He pulled the boy into his arms, embracing him tightly as he caresses his back. He lied on the grass with the boy on top of him, his hand not stopping from caressing his back. For a moment his eyes felt heavy as he closed his eyes, and soon afterwards, fell asleep on the soft grass beneath him. _

Rivaille slowly opened his eyes, waking up from his dream. He slowly sat up, blinking a few times as he recalled the dream he had.

'_Childhood dream, huh?' _Rivaille brought his hand to his eyes, rubbing it softly and gave a small yawn. It was Saturday today; the school was having a holiday of course. He swung his legs off the bed and sleepily walked to the bathroom. It was rare for him to have such a dream. His mind then drifted to the boy in his dream. Eren… had he been having this kind of dream lately? Rivaille let out a loud sigh. It was morning and his mind was already so busy thinking. He quickly turned the tap water on and splashed cold water at his face several times.

* * *

Rivaille stared blankly at the television, not knowing what to do with his holiday. It was when Irvin interrupted him that he turned his attention towards the older man.

"Is there somewhere that you would like to go today?" Irvin asked as he put the last dirty plate in the dishwasher. Rivaille was now dangling his arm on the back of the sofa, throwing a bored look at him.

"Nothing in particular." He mumbled. He was hoping that he could have something to do other than lazing around in the house. Maybe he should do the cleaning?

"Oh… It started snowing…" Irvin said when he checked outside the window. Rivaille's eyes shifted to the snow from outside the window then a realization dawned on him. He whipped his head towards the calendar.

"Crap, Petra… I almost forgot." Rivaille said, cursing as he rose to his feet. Irvin looked at him for a moment in confusion.

"You can't possibly go back to France just to go to her, right?" Watching the shorter male walk back towards his room to change clothes.

"No, of course not!" Irvin was puzzled at his answer before he shook his head, smiling at his cousin. He looked back to the window muttering to himself,

"It's always snowing on the day you left, Petra…"

"Irvin, I'm going. I'll take the umbrella." Rivaille said as he walked outside the house, fully ready. Irvin stared at the closed door, the younger male didn't even asked if his cousin wanted to go along with him. Shaking his head, he let out a soft chuckle. It's good to have Rivaille a bit energetic. His blue eyes stared at the mug he was holding in his hand. His features changed from relaxed into a sour expression. Irvin puts the mug down and walked towards a small vase. He plucked one of the roses after he made sure it was the smallest of all. He then walked back into his room and places the roses in front of Petra's photo. His eyes stared at her smiling face with a flickering sadness.

'_Petra, it's been a few years after you passed away. I guess you are free up in heaven without illness and pain now. Rivaille is slowly making his life better each day. I hope you can guide him from above to have his past life forgotten.' _Grazing the photo frame with the tips of his fingers, Irvin's lips formed into a thin smile.

* * *

Rivaille walked inside a flower shop and momentarily stopped when he saw the boy he wasn't expecting to see during the holiday. Their eyes met for a moment before Eren blushed at his sight.

"Good Morning, Rivaille-san." He mumbled to him, fumbling on the card he was holding. Rivaille gave a silent nod, eyes never leaving him.

"Morning." He mumbled back, standing beside him in front of the counter.

"Eren, here is the flower." Mikasa paused when she saw Rivaille standing beside her brother. The girl frowned at him.

"What are you doing here?" She asked, not hiding her annoyance in her voice. Rivaille shrugged at her.

"I can ask you the same thing." He slipped his hands inside his jacket's pocket. Surely, their school was not against their students having a part-time job. Mikasa is working in a flower shop? Rivaille had to hold his mockery, knowing very well how violent the girl could be when she wanted to. Eren smiled at him.

"Mikasa is working here as a part-time. This flower store is Christa's mother's business. Though Christa was now having an errand to the market near here." Rivaille fumed after Eren explained the reason. Mikasa gave the bouquets of flowers to Eren when he reached his hands for it.

"Here. Can you put my own bouquet-made in front of her grave as well? I will go there after I finish my shift this evening." Eren nodded at her, slipping the card inside the bouquet.

"Grave?" Rivaille asked, earning a look from both of them.

"Yes, our mother's." Eren said, staring at the bouquets in his hands.

"I see… I'm also here for grave flowers. One bouquet, and separated flower petals, please." Rivaille said, eyeing Mikasa to prepare them for him. Mikasa silently nodded at him and walked back inside the small storage where she picked the flowers and stuff.

"May I know who those are for?" Eren eyed him curiously.

"Petra… a friend of mine. Irvin's childhood friend."

"I see…" Eren watched him for a moment, halting up the question about the other petals for. After Mikasa was done with Rivaille's order, they both walked out the store in silence, raising their umbrellas. Eren looked at the older man, unsure what to say to him, speculating which graveyard Rivaille was going to visit.

"I will go with you to the graveyard." Rivaille said knowing what Eren was thinking.

"Oh… okay…" he said and led him to the train station.

* * *

Eren places the flower on top of the grave; he then crouched down and clapped his hands together, praying. Opening his eyes after a few minutes to realize that Rivaille had put one of the flower bouquets in front of his mother's grave, praying along with him. His green eyes looked down to the flower when Rivaille opened his eyes.

"Do you know my mother as well?" Eren asked in a soft voice. Rivaille stood up from his crouching position, taking the flower in his hand.

"A long time ago, when you were seven years old." He turned his back to Eren. The brunet rose to his feet, frowning at him.

"I see… another forgotten memory…" Rivaille looked at the boy from the corner of his eyes when the frustrated tone was heard in his voice. Eren staggered when Rivaille started to walk away. Following the man in wonder, he called out to him, but Rivaille kept walking, fully ignoring him. Eren's footsteps trailed him whilst Rivaille walked towards the barrier of the cliff, showing a full view of the ocean. Eren stood beside the man, surprised when Rivaille pulled the flower petals from inside the small plastic bag and throwing them by the sea little by little. Walking closer to the barrier, his eyes stared down at the fallen petals onto being washed away by the wave.

"Petra… Thank you for your guidance. Now I'm here with the person I've been longing to see. It must be your doing for bringing us together again." Rivaille whispered as his eyes stared into the horizon. For a moment Eren stayed silent at those words. He wasn't sure if he should ask what he meant by those words, who Rivaille was seeking for that he said along those lines.

"Petra was a friend of mine. She was much older than I am. She was born with an illness and had to be inside the house for the rest of her life. I went back to France when I was 15 years old and stayed in her house for a few years. Irvin knew I wouldn't like being sent back home, because my parents thought of me differently. As an aristocrat, having a weird child like me who could see many _hallucinations_, they thought of me as filthy." Eren gazed at Rivaille's whose eyes never leaving the horizon. He could see his murky glares when he started telling him the story. The younger of the two didn't say anything to let Rivaille continue, but he couldn't help not to frown at the thought of Rivaille's parents.

"Hanji, is her distant relatives, yes, I know. It's surprising enough. That science-freak, Hanji Zoe, your science teacher. She was the one taking care of her the whole time, while continuing studying in university. When I stayed in the house, Petra was the only one listening to my past life stories. She was so kind and trusting. Never did she laughed on every of my stories like Irvin did. Sometimes I wonder if she could also see those chain nightmares." The raven haired man walked closer to the metal barrier and leaned his arms against it despite the coldness.

"Did she pass away from the illness?" Eren asked in a soft tone, earning a nod from the older man.

"Yes, sadly it didn't last long of my stay there. After the burial, I went to the military on my own will despite the fact that Irvin tried to stop me." Green met dark orbs for a moment, before Rivaille stood up straight, breaking their eye contact. He wasn't sure if he should tell Eren about the reason he entered the Military.

"Let's go. The snow is getting heavier." Rivaille said and walked away, half ordering Eren to follow him. Eren hesitated for a moment but he followed the man nonetheless. He felt by following him, maybe he would know something important. Somehow, looking Rivaille's back as they walked out from the graveyard made Eren's heart clenched painfully. His eyes saw a silhouette of wings on Rivaille's back pasted on a green cloak. Blinking in surprise, Eren quickly rubbed his eyes and the wings disappeared from his line of sight.

'_Was it my imagination?'_

_**TBC**_

_**A/N:**_

First of all, I want to apologize for those who liked Petra ;w; If you ask me why I chose her to be one of the chara's death beside Eren's mom, well, she's the closest to Rivaille, you know, the SPOILER'marriage'SPOILER thing. And after listening to the OST "Call Your Name," I got the idea what her life supposed to be in this ff. Once again, sorry D:

Second, I'm starting the story telling :3 I'm sure that all of you already know what happened in the _past_ as all of you had watched the anime. The giants, 3D MG and stuff. So I won't write _full_ details on it, I mean what for? XD I won't write something all of you had known while watching and reading snk. But I will write something about how their past lives ended and how it was related to this ff. :D

Third, Thank you –hugs all for reading this fic– Upcoming next, will be a date. –wink wink– :DD Reviews are much appreciated.

Forth, As for the question from latechocox3,  
No, Irvin did not remember about his past life. When he said "It's always snowing during the day you left, Petra…"  
I mean, when Petra passed away, it was snowing. .w. since then every year it's her death anniversary , its always snowing. that's what I mean.


	7. Surreptitious

**Overwhelm Emotions**

**Genre: **Drama Romance AU Reincarnation

**Rating:** T

**Pairing: (mainly)** Rivaille x Eren

_**Summary: **_Being woven in his dreams and memories, Rivaille was at a loss. The second encounter with a certain boy made it even much worse than he thought it would be, especially when the boy is reaching his hands out to him again.

**Disclaimer: **

I don't own Shingeki no Kyojin, but this fanfiction is mine.

© AsakuraHannah on Ffn

_**Chapter 7 : Surreptitious**_

Both of them walked inside a café which Eren timidly checked around inside. The café seemed luxurious he noted, he won't order something and just let Rivaille order his as they sat down on the chosen secluded area. The waiter gave the menu to them and told them he would come back once they had decided on what they wanted to order. Rivaille gave a nod and flipped the menu open. He stopped reading the lists of the food when he noticed Eren didn't even budge to open the menu in front of him.

"Order something, I will pay." He said, making Eren jumped slightly in the command. Eren coyly opened the menu and read the list before his eyes widened at the price. It was too high for a high school standard. His green pupil slowly peeking up to Rivaille, surprised when he noticed Rivaille was staring at him, waiting.

"Hurry up and decide, brat." Rivaille clicked his tongue impatiently. Eren closed the menu and grinned nervously.

"I will have what you have. Thanks." He said, making Rivaille raised an eyebrow at him.

"If you say so." He mumbled shortly and called the waiter back to their table. Eren watched as his teacher ordered the food for him. His eyes widened when Rivaille mentioned liquor and spaghetti.

"Water, please!" he quickly said, earning a soft chuckle from Rivaille.

"Just water is alright. As for mine, omelet and coke. Can you bring me a piece of paper and a pen, please? Thanks." Rivaille said, throwing Eren a smug grin as the boy's face turned red, trying to avoid eye contact. The silence engulfed them until the waiter came back with the things Rivaille asked him to bring. Eren slowly raised his head to stare at him when Rivaille started to draw something as soon as the waiter left.

"Just one question. Do you know what this is?" Rivaille said, raising the paper for Eren to what he had just drawn. Eren took the paper from his hand, examined the wings-look alike logo on it. He… just saw it before his eyes a few hours ago, but he wasn't sure if it was only his vision playing tricks into his eyes. He ran his fingers to his temple, Eren slowly shook his head.

"No." Rivaille's hand twitched at the answer.

"Try harder, Eren." He growled; almost sound pleading but Eren shook his head yet again.

"I don't know what is this… but it looked familiar." Eren looked at Rivaille and gave the paper back to him. He could see a slightly relieved in his eyes when he looked into those gray eyes of his. Their fingers brushed against each other, making the younger flinched a little at the contact. Eren retracted his hands away, pursing his lips together as the warm of Rivaille's hand lingered on his fingers.

"Freedom Wings." Rivaille said, putting the paper in front of him. A flash of his dream came to Eren's mind when he heard it. Eren gasped.

"I… I've heard it… in my dreams." Eren admitted with a nod. Rivaille was taken back at that.

"My childhood dream." The brunet added. Hearing the sound of frustrated sigh coming out from Rivaille's lips, Eren puckered his brow.

"Childhood huh?" he clicked his tongue, crumpling the paper.

"Rivaille-san?" Eren asked him to continue when the man remained silent, eyes looking outside the window. A moment later the waiter came back with their meals and Eren quickly stuff his mouth happily. It's not every day he could eat something fancy as now. Being treated for lunch with his teacher was a rare moment, it was like a date. Eren almost choked on his own thought, he couldn't believe what he was thinking just now. He somehow felt relieved when Rivaille broke his thought in the middle of their lunch.

"Eren, I believe that I've told you this before. About my hallucinating and the past life I had said in the infirmary. Do you still want to hear it?" The questioned made the boy stunned.

"I… do." He said shortly. Rivaille shifted his eyes to stare into those enticing green eyes of him.

"What if… I told you that we've met in the past before?" Rivaille shifted nervously, not knowing where to look when those eyes widened slightly, the way those lips opened. Rivaille prepared the worse for the boy's reaction, expecting for Eren to burst out laughing or mocking him. He was staring at him agape when Eren's eyes gleaming in full of curiosity.

"How do I look like that time?" Eren asked excitedly. Rivaille opened his mouth at the question; he quickly covered it before he gave a laugh. He coughed instead, faking laughed at the boy's curious look.

"You surprised me with that question. What do you expect me to answer to that?" Rivaille gave a smirk when Eren pouted. Deep inside, the older man felt that the heavy burden being lifted up little by little. Watching across the boy, he was amused with the way Eren was munching the food hurriedly, snorted when he saw the sauce on Eren's cheek.

"Eat slowly, brat." Eren's green eyes watched in stunned when Rivaille took the nearby tissue and wiped his cheek clean. Eren lost his grip on the fork he was holding, making it cluttered on the plate pretty loudly. Rivaille blinked in surprised at the sound. Eren's face felt like its burning up, he was sure that Rivaille could see his smoldering face as he backed away from the older man's hand.

"I'm sorry. I can clean it myself." Eren said and took another tissue, wiping his mouth several times. He tried his best not to look into the older man's face. Rivaille retracted his hand from the flushing boy, averting his gaze away from Eren's obvious reaction. He tried to act like nothing happened and continue eating his lunch.

"If you are free… tomorrow… we can go somewhere nice and I can tell you the story little by little." Rivaille said after he swallowed.

"Why not now?" the question made Rivaille blinked.

"I have things to do, brat. Such as cleaning the house… Besides the road towards here was taking up a few hours, it would take such a long time to tell the whole stories. Just what time do you want to arrive at home? Do you want to go tomorrow or not?" Eren timidly gave a silent nod at the invitation.

"Okay. Tomorrow that is." Eren said as an answered, eyes looking outside the window as the snow had started to clear up.

* * *

Mikasa stared at her sibling when she stood in front of the graveyard. She had texted him that she was in front of their mother's graveyard when Eren came back wearing such an awful crimson face.

"Eren? Are you alright?"

"I'm fine." Eren brought his hand up to his mouth while his other hand clutched his mobile phone tightly. He couldn't believe that he got his teacher's phone number. Eren avoided Mikasa's question look, biting his lower lip as he tried not to smile like an idiot. He kept his hand covering his mouth until they walked outside the grave with Mikasa leading him on the front.

* * *

Mikasa raised an eyebrow at Eren who hurriedly ran downstairs, already looking neat and ready to go. It's not usual that her sibling wake up in the morning, usually during Sunday he was still in bed at least until 11 o'clock. Mikasa eyed him suspiciously.

"Eren, are you going somewhere?" She asked while pulling the toasts off from the toaster and put them on the empty clean plate. Eren gave a nod after pausing for a second.

"Uhm yeah. I probably won't be back soon, but I'll be home before dinner." He mumbled, trying to avoid eye contact from the skeptical looking girl. Mikasa gave her sibling the plate of toasts after she put the scramble egg on top of it to Eren. Reminding Eren that he at least had to have breakfast before he go. She was actually making breakfast for her own, but now that the brunet appeared to be in a hurry, she let him have hers. There was no way she made him starving until lunch time.

"If you say so. Are you going with Armin?" Mikasa asked, her eyes never leaving him as Eren took a seat and started eating. Eren paused for a moment, he quickly gave a nod. He hurriedly ate his breakfast before Mikasa asked furthermore. He knew he should keep a secret from her since Mikasa did not seem to like Rivaille that much.

After he finished with his breakfast, Eren quickly walked outside the house, leaving the dishes for Mikasa to do. He hurriedly picked up his phone to text Armin, telling him that if Mikasa asked, he's going with the blonde. Of course his best friend complied. Eren bit his lip nervously, checking his watch. He was sure being a teacher and all, Rivaille must have arrived early before the time they had promised.

His guess was right when he saw the guy standing under the large tree in the middle of the main park of the city. Eren stared at the man who was leaning against the tree, holding a small book while his other hand inside the pants pocket. The shorter man was wearing a long green coat and a scarf, avoiding the cold breeze. Eren blushed at the lean figure before his eyes, he had no idea why, but the man had caught his attention ever since he started talking about his past. The way he slumped his head on the palm of his hand that time in the infirmary, he looked in a deep sorrow for years searching for something. The image burned in his eyes, he could never forget that expression in Rivaille's eyes when he told him that he would listen to all of those stories about reincarnation he had said. The man also told him that the past had included Eren in it. The brunet couldn't help but felt even more curious on the tale. Rivaille promised him that he would tell him everything he remembered today. Eren couldn't wait to listen to all of those dreamlike stories. His lips curved into a smile.

"Rivaille-san." The guy raised his eyes away from the book and he gave a small nod of acknowledgement. He stood properly and walked towards Eren in a slow pace, their eyes never leaving each other. Eren swallowed nervously for a moment until his teacher was right in front of him. He was surprised when Rivaille suddenly flicked his forehead painfully, earning a soft gasped from the boy.

"What was that for?!" Eren grumbled, his cheeks flushing as he brought his hand to rub his sore forehead.

"Quit gawking like you are going to eat me. Let's go. Anywhere you wanted to go?" Rivaille walked away, fully ignoring Eren's sputtering.

"Nothing in particular." Eren pouted as he followed him when Rivaille heading out of the park. Rivaille looked at him, eyebrow rising at the short reply.

"Don't tell me you wanted to go to the amusement park." Rivaille scoffed.

"I didn't say anything, Sensei!" Eren threw him a look, the man obviously older than him, but there's no reason for him to treat Eren like a small child. That retort earned a chuckle from Rivaille, the name calling to remind him about their relationship as a student and teacher. Something which reminded Rivaille that they were once a Superior and an Underling. His lips curved into a thin smile, in both lives, he was older than Eren.

"Stop with that 'Sensei' thing."

"I just want to listen to all your stories about the past life you are talking about." Eren muttered, glaring down at the ground as his shoes stepped on the dirty pavements. His eyes slowly looked up when he heard Rivaille gave a sigh, letting a white fog out from his mouth.

"It won't be like a date then…" Rivaille said, eyes meeting Eren's widened emerald orbs. _Those cheeks… turning red again. _Rivaille fumed at his reaction. _How fast can it be…?_ He rose an eyebrow, knowing that the boy had fallen but still in denial. Probably because he was older that he could tell when someone at Eren's age was falling in love. The boy was obvious. He pulled Eren's hand, forcing them to hold hands. Eren's hand was pretty cold, Rivaille could feel the nervousness as he gripped the younger hand tightly.

"Calm down, will you? Don't you have gloves?" Rivaille said, he was un-amused to the fact that Eren was so shy just because of holding hands.

"I'm calm. I left my gloves at home" Eren protested when Rivaille half dragging him. Eren watched Rivaille's back when he paced before him, being half pulled like this didn't look like a _date_ at all. He frowned while he strides faster to match Rivaille's steps.

"Stupid brat, the weather is cold." Rivaille said, clutching Eren's hand tightly. When Eren didn't say anything, he continued.

"Which part do you want to hear about? Freedom Wings? The way we were back then? Military forces?" Rivaille was now staring at Eren who picked up his pace to walk beside him.

"Military?" Rivaille gave a nod at Eren's surprised question.

"Yes, we were in the military forces called Scouting Legion that time, fighting Giants who happily devour humanity to extinction." Eren watched Rivaille's eyes stared into a long distance.

"Devour…" Eren's word made those gray eyes turned to look at him. Rivaille let go of his hand, he brought his hand to caress Eren's cheek lightly. Eren felt himself leaned against the hand of his, blushing a bit.

"What about the freedom wings?" Eren whispered his question, feeling the hand on his cheek went rigid. Rivaille pulled his hand away slowly, clenching his hand into a fist. He turned around from those curious green orbs.

"It's our symbol for Freedom. We used 3D Maneuver Gear which made us fly using the fiber and gas to fight those giant monsters. I will show you the 3D Maneuver Gear later in my sketch book. The symbol that I showed you yesterday, it formed wings seeking for freedom. We became the hope of humankind since our team fought bravely against those giants." Rivaille's lips formed into a thin smile when he saw from the corner of his eyes that those emerald orbs were gleaming in marvel.

"Do you remember? That time you were one of our best teammates." Eren shook his head, frowning sadly. He couldn't remember a thing, but he felt his heart throb painfully.

"You look exactly the same as you were back then. I was the Corporal that time and you were my underling. I was in charge of your custody." Rivaille started walking again, telling him each of the things he remembered, pulling Eren along with him. He looked at Eren when the boy clasped their hand together. The raven guy gave a small smile, tightening their hand hold.

Rivaille sat down on the bench they passed by. Eren walked over to the vending machine not far from them, choosing his own drink and Rivaille's. Rivaille waited for Eren who was still crouching before the vending machine. He gazed at him, thinking about the things he needed to tell him. There were too many to talk about, he was confused about which one he should explain to him. When Eren came back with two drinks in his hands, Rivaille took it with a nod. The boy sat down beside him, wrapping his hands around the warm can with a sigh. A white fog coming out from his mouth as he sighed, his mind tried grasping the ideas of their previous life they were having back then. The man did not lie, what he was saying was the truth, every time Rivaille told him something, he could feel his heart stung. Eren felt he had heard all of those things Rivaille was telling him.

Eren's eyes gazed on the river before his eyes, emerald orbs glazing as a flash of memories appear. He had dreamed one of those, but he wasn't sure if it was about their previous life. His brows frowned; he remembered the kiss on his forehead, nose, and cheek. Eren flushed at the memory when he was almost being kissed on the lips in that dream.

"Eren?" Rivaille asked after he lowered his drink down, watching him in concerned.

"How was our relationship back then?" Rivaille halted his movement, to shock to react towards the question being thrown at him. He shifted his eyes away from the curious green eyes.

"Didn't I tell you that we were soldiers? My rank is higher than you."

"Only that?" Eren asked, he could see that Rivaille almost flinched.

"… Yes." Rivaille mumbled, his eyes staring blankly into those shimmering eyes of Eren's. Eren gave a slow nod, why does he have a feeling that Rivaille was lying? Maybe he could hear the truth as the time went on. Eren opened his can and took a drink.

Not far from them, a dirty-blonde guy was gaping at the two with a shock on his face. He couldn't help but to chuckle at the sight in front of him. He was on a short walk with Marco and he was about to go to the vending machine when he spotted the teacher and student, sitting side by side, chatting slightly. This would be good news for the entire class. Jean grinned wickedly.

"Look, Marco. I saw big news coming." Jean called out to him when the black hair guy did not seem to recognize what he was seeing. Marco watched the two for a moment; he could sense the surrounding between the two of them. He then pulled Jean's arm, dragging him away.

"Let's go somewhere else, Jean. I'm sure the two of them wouldn't want to be bothered." Jean gave a grunt of disappointment.

* * *

Mikasa glared at Armin when the blonde mutely looked at her, gulping while he took a few steps back.

"Are you saying that Eren did not go out with you?" Mikasa was horrified when he saw Armin alone in the bookstore. She accidentally bumped into him when she was about to turn to the corner section. Armin gave a hesitant nod, fidgeting as Mikasa threw him a panicked expression. She quickly pulled her phone out from her bag, dialing Eren's number.

"Mi-Mikasa. I don't think you should…" Armin stopped and gave a sigh when Eren picked it up. _Sorry, Eren. I let her interfere during your date with whoever you are now._ Armin averted his blue eyes tiredly from the furious girl.

* * *

They were sitting in comfortable silence when Eren's mobile phone suddenly rang pretty loud. The boy jolted in surprise, taking it out from his pants pocket and horrified when he saw who was calling him.

"Crap, Mikasa." Eren cursed, earning an eyebrow rose from Rivaille.

"Did you not tell her that you went out?"

"Well… I'm not telling her who I'm going with…" Eren fumbled on his phone when it gave another ringing.

"Just pick it up, it's so noisy." Rivaille said with a 'tsk'. Eren slowly pressed the call button and brought the phone closer to his ear. Rivaille sighed at him, now it was obvious that Eren had never dated anyone in this life either. The Mikasa was always too over-protective. He couldn't help giving him a funny look when Eren flinched at the shout from the other line. He slowly brought his hand up and patted Eren's head, making the boy looked at him surprised. _Let me be your first in this life too…_

"_Eren, where are you currently? Who are you going out with?"_ Eren could hear the concern in Mikasa's voice, he groaned tiredly over the phone. Armin must have told her about it or she found it out by herself. Either way, it's annoying.

"Look, Mikasa. I don't feel the need to tell you everything. I mean, let me have some free time alone." Eren looked at Rivaille who watched his every movement in silence. He caught a glimpse of the man's amusement when the brunet was talking with his sister. He squat the hand on top of his head with a blush across his face, fully upset that his teacher was actually treating him like a kid. One over-protective sister was enough, he did not need another one. He could barely hear on the things Mikasa was saying in the other line, grumbling to her.

"I'm fine, Mikasa. Now just leave me alone." With that Eren ended the phone.

"Done?" Rivaille asked in boring look. Eren glared at him, the man was fully enjoying it despite the look on his face.

"Done." He huffed and stood up abruptly.

"Where shall we go now? Is your guardian heading here that we need to change places?"Rivaille did not hide his teasing tone and smirk on his lips. Annoyed, Eren gave him a look and pulled his wrist along and he started walking, surprising the raven-hair man. Where did the shyness go away?

"Let's just move somewhere warmer." Eren mumbled. Much to his surprise, Rivaille suddenly stood before him, snatched the phone from his hand and switching it off. Eren eyed him astounded, taking his phone back when his teacher pushed the phone into his hands.

"When doing a secret date, that is the way it should be, brat." Rivaille was amused when Eren's face could get much redder than before. Rivaille ignored his protests and dragged him into a café, which soon Eren found out that the guy love to hang out in the café to drink coffee and such for a long long time.

* * *

Mikasa was gaping at her phone with a disbelieving look. Eren did not just ended the call on her. What happened to the cute and adorable little brother she has? She clenched her mobile for a moment before throwing it in her bag, totally threw her frustration on the act. Armin watched her with a frown and sighed.

"I think you have to admit that, one day, you will have to let him go, Mikasa." Armin mumbled, slowly meeting his blue eyes to Mikasa's darkened look. She turned her face away from him.

"I was just trying to protect him from that teacher, you know what I meant." Mikasa stated, before walking away from Armin. Armin pulled out his phone, checking the text message that Eren sent him this morning. He was pretty sure that the boy never went out secretly with anyone, he'd be the first to know when something happened to his best friend. He knew Eren very well since they were little, he frowned when he read the last message Eren send.

"_I'm out with Rivaille-san."_ The message was clearly surprised him this morning, but he somehow knew even if they tried to hide Eren from the truth of his childhood memories, it would come back to him when he had to know everything. Armin just hopes that Rivaille won't force Eren anything to make him remember something painful. He didn't want Eren to suffer with those memories anymore. Armin gritted his teeth as he clutched his mobile tightly in his hand.

* * *

Rivaille stared at Eren who was staring down at the menu timidly, _again_. He raised an eyebrow when his green eyes looked up at him curiously; surely the boy brought some money with him, didn't he? Rivaille let out an exasperated sigh.

"Eren, just how much did you have in your pocket every week, brat?" Rivaille pulled the menu away from him. Eren gave a sheepish grin at him, which made the man fully irritated.

"Not much." There he said shortly, making Rivaille's eyebrow twitched.

"You can't seriously hang on to Mikasa's part-time job, are you? I know your father is busy and all that stuff…" Rivaille squinting his eyes at the boy who shook his head.

"Sometimes I help out around the school, be it in the library, cleaning, canteen, or any other duties I could take. Sometimes they offer me, sometimes don't. I'm not smart like Mikasa who could take many things in her hands, so I guess I will just focus on my studies and tried to earn little by little." Eren gave a small smile, looking down from the look Rivaille giving him. The boy felt relieved when Rivaille huffed at his answer, and called out the waiter for their order. Once Rivaille finished to order, he looked at Eren who kept silently in front of him.

"I'm paying, if that makes you relieve." The dark hair man couldn't help but to roll his eyes when Eren threw him a joyful expression.

"Rivaille-san, you said yesterday that you went to the military on your own free will in this life. Does that have something to do with your past life?" Rivaille gazed at him for a moment, considering his answers, he clasped his hands together and put them on the table in front of him.

"Yes, indeed. I… I felt the need to atone for what was taking place during the previous life… Including the accident which happened during childhood. I was fifteen when the accident taking place. I thought when I went to the military, those painful memories will stop flooding my mind. But, it just won't stop." Eren cocked his head to the side. Fifteen? Meaning he was seventh during that time. Eren leaned forward, trying to get the information better.

"What accident?" Rivaille frowned when Eren questioned him.

"Eren, don't you remember your childhood memories at all?" Eren's eyes turn grim when he heard him, the boy shook his head.

"Looks like I lost it." Eren said shortly, he could watch Rivaille features turn exasperated.

"Eren, you lost your memory! Didn't either Armin or Mikasa explain it to you!?" Rivaille let out a frustrated tone, hand grasping Eren's palm across from him. Eren fidgeted slightly at the touch, he winced when a sharp pain shoot through his temple. He brought his other hand to clutch his temple, hissing in pain.

"Eren?" Rivaille asked in concern when Eren was not clutching his head in pain, earning a grunt in response.

"Strangely it was all foggy, I can't seem to recall anything, Rivaille-san. I tried to ask Mikasa and Armin but they always said that I just forgot." Eren gave a sigh, rubbing his head. It won't stop aching. Rivaille clicked his tongue after hearing the fact. Surely, they couldn't hide it from him forever, right?!

"Eren, did you remember the time when you fell off from the tree?" _I need to make him at least remember his childhood before remembering the past life._ Seeing Eren's green eyes widened, Rivaille gave a frown at his condition. He became alerted when Eren was now clenching his head with both hands while letting out a grunt of pain.

"Eren…" Rivaille quickly stood up from his seat, bypassing the table towards the boy. He kneeled down in front of him, grabbing his shoulders. Eren's pupils were quivering as he tried to focus on him, Rivaille could see tiny drops of sweat-beads on his forehead. His headache must be excruciating.

"Levi-san…" He whispered before blackened out. Rivaille stared at him stunned at the name calling, quickly caught the boy when he fell forward onto him.

"Eren!" Rivaille shouted when the boy collapse into his arms. The people who were nearby staring at them in worried. The waiter that had brought their food starting to get panic at the scene. Rivaille brows furrowed while he brought Eren in his arms.

"Damn it!" He cursed as he pulled Eren's mobile out from the boy's pocket. He adjusted Eren's weight on his lap, fumbling over the phone. He needed to bring Eren home, but he did not know Eren's house.. He needed either Armin or Mikasa to tell him. No, forget about Mikasa, right now, Armin was the best option. He cursed when Eren's phone was locked in a password. Forget it, he'd bring him home.

_**TBC**_

_I'm sorry if this isn't really a date n.n''_

"I… do." He said shortly. (I felt like writing a wedding scene here XDD –escape))

Naaw, go fangirling in the reviewww :3


	8. Memory

**Overwhelming Emotions**

**Genre: **Drama Romance | AU | Reincarnation

**Rating: **T

**Pairing: **(mainly) Rivaille x Eren

**_Summary__: _**Being woven in his dreams and memories, Rivaille was at a loss. The second encounter with a certain boy made it even much worse than he thought it would be, especially when the boy is reaching his hands out to him again.

**Disclaimer:**

I don't own Shingeki no Kyojin, but this fanfiction is mine.

©AsakuraHannah at Ffn

**_Chapter 8 : Memory_**

Rivaille gazed sadly at the sleeping boy who was lying in his bed. He went through all the trouble of bringing him back home, ignoring Irvin's surprised expression when he saw Rivaille with Eren on his back. Takeaway foods were in the plastic bag, dangling from his hands. He had considered stopping by in the park with Eren for a few minutes until he'd wake up on his own, but that was not a good option in the freezing weather, so he just called a taxi to take them home.

As he waited for Eren to regain consciousness, Rivaille bent down on the bed for a closer look when he saw the boy was frowning in his sleep. He wondered if he had pushed him too far when he attempted to make him remember everything. He brought his hand up to run it across his face in frustration.

"He's the one after all…" Rivaille raised his head to look at the clear glass mugs surrounded by a cold mist on top of the tray Irvin was holding. Irvin had watched his every movement from the entrance of the room. Never had he seen Rivaille lose his stoic expression like that. Never had he seen Rivaille looked so desperate and worried over something.

"What do you mean?" Rivaille asked, squinting his eyes at the older man. Irvin did not directly reply his question, setting the tray down.

"The boy who was from your past and the one that got caught up in that accident." Irvin stated. Rivaille didn't flinch at the sentence, but Irvin knew he winced on the inside.

"I find it hard to believe that you _finally_ acknowledged it. You almost sounded like my parent every time I brought that up, although you are not as bad as them." Irvin looked at Eren instead of replying to Rivaille's statement. Rivaille followed his gaze back to Eren's features, letting out a soft sigh.

"He's precious to me, Irvin. I don't even know why I have to meet him again. I… I tried to get away from him once. He almost lost his life during the accident because of me. Why do I have to meet him again now? Without knowing I've hurt him again, he kept running towards me, extending his hands to reach me and my painful memories. This is the second time. Last time I recall, he was in Germany. Why Japan?" Rivaille whispered. Irvin leaned against the wall, arms crossed over his chest, studying him.

"I think they had been in Japan for a long time. Maybe it has something to do with Eren's mother. Either way, it was your fate to meet him again." Rivaille clenched his fists at the last word.

"I need to remind you though, Rivaille. Be careful, even if you are only an internship, a teacher is a teacher. Your age gap between Eren will be questioned and your teacher-student relationship will be claimed as an inappropriate by small-minded people." Rivaille snorted at that.

"I will contact Armin to let him know about Eren." Rivaille could only give a silent nod. Surely, as their homeroom teacher, Irvin had almost all the student's emergency contacts. While the older of the two busily searched for the numbers on his phone lists, Rivaille eyed Eren carefully. The brunet's eyebrows furrowed and his lips mumbling incoherently. Rivaille wondered what kind of dream he was having, hoping it wasn't the nightmare Rivaille was having almost every night. He took Eren's hands into his, holding them tightly.

* * *

"Levi." Armin walked inside the room towards his internship teacher. The raven's gaze made him feel slightly frightened for when their eyes met, but he knew Rivaille was a quiet person who loved to think a lot while gazing at others. Being his student for some time in the school had made him learn little by little about the older man. Not only that, the person before him was his childhood friend, even if Rivaille was now different from the cheerful boy Armin knew back then.

He was thankful when he had received the news from Irvin, having immediately ran towards his house. Rivaille had insisted on carrying Eren in his arms instead of letting Irvin drive them there. His will was turned down when Rivaille realized Eren's house was pretty far after he had walked a few stations, especially with Eren on his back. In the end, he borrowed Irvin's car for the drive to Eren's house. Armin even unlocked the door to the house when they found it was empty. Mikasa hadn't come back home, probably having gone straight to her part-time job. Luckily, Eren brought his own key along with him everywhere he went so that they could walk inside.

"Don't call me that. I'm… not Levi. I'm not longer an aristocrat, I threw that name away." Armin's eyes glistened in surprise when he heard those words. He gave a hesitant nod, shifting his eyes towards Eren.

"How's Eren?" The question was immediate.

"He is alright."

"I see…" Rivaille gave an indecisive look at the taller boy beside him before deciding to ask the question that had been nagging him.

"Can I ask one more question…? Did Eren also lose his past memories during the accident?" His heart clenched when Armin gave a sad look and nodded. Grimacing when he felt a pang of pain in his chest, he hastily turned his back to Armin.

"Do you… mean it?" Armin eyes looked up to Rivaille's back, waiting until the man turned his face towards him.

"The time when you said that we were your underlings in those… past memories you have." Armin was now fiddling with his own fingers nervously. Rivaille's expression never changed, but the teacher gave a short answer.

"Yes."

Armin remained silent; eyes casted downwards.

"Eren… did not know his condition about the loss of his memory." Armin said, earning a blink from Rivaille. Surely the raven did not expect him to talk about it. Raising his blue eyes to meet Rivaille's gaze, Armin gave a thin smile.

"You left to France because you felt guilty, but Mikasa took it in the wrong way. I don't know if I should be grateful about the way you tried to explain to Eren his past memories from his childhood. He had been desperate, confusing dreams with reality. I'm kind of glad that you could see those dreams yourself and tried to guide him. Even though Mikasa insisted that it was all just a nightmare." Armin's expression turned sour as he recalled the memory. Rivaille remained silent, allowing the boy to continue.

"I might be such a bad friend, being happy about the fact Eren lost his memory along with his past life. That time, you tried to catch him when he fell off of the tree. He misunderstood what Freedom Wings meant."

"It's my fault." Rivaille said, looking down with a harsh look on his face. Armin shook his head.

"Maybe it's for the best that Eren lost it all. He would suffer more if he continued remembering the past. If all those memories were painful, it's best if he just forgets it. I just want him to be happy in this life."

Rivaille gave a small nod. "I won't force him." He felt his heart being torn apart now. He shouldn't have tried.

"I hope you can understand." Armin whispered, giving Rivaille a last firm look, before walking outside the room. Rivaille leaned against the wall once again, biting his lower lip to the point blood started dripping down his chin.

"I'm sorry…" he whispered as he closed his eyes, eyebrows furrowed in deep regret. He pressed his palm hard against his temple, biting his lip painfully to suppress his sobs. A flash of memory ran in his mind.

_Rivaille's eyes stared up in worry when he saw the boy climbing up the tree. The balloon that was stuck on the tree branch was too high for him to reach. Not only that, the branch wouldn't be strong enough to hold his weight. He gave a gasp when Eren fell right after he grasped the balloon in his hand. Running as fast as he could, Rivaille stretched his arms far enough to catch the boy in his arms. Armin and Mikasa were shouting at them as the adults who were nearby started to run in their direction frantically._

_Rivaille fell onto the dirty ground with the boy in his arms, trying to shield him as much as he could from having an immense injury. He could hear his own breath hitch, and he ignored the pain shooting through several parts of his body. Having landed harshly, Rivaille rolled onto his back with a groan. As he sat up with Eren in his arms, his eyes widened when he saw blood trickling down the child's forehead. His face turned pale; he couldn't even hear the questions the people were throwing at him._

"_Mikasa, you wait here. I will call Doctor Jaeger!" Armin shouted, already running off before Mikasa could stop him. Rivaille quickly pulled his handkerchief from his pants pocket and wiped the blood away with trembling hands. __His mind swayed with countless worries__. He picked up Eren in his arms, thinking that he should head to the clinic near the park as soon as possible._

_"Mikasa, wait here until Armin comes back with your father. Tell them I took Eren to the clinic near here." _

_The girl could only nod in silence; Rivaille knew that she wouldn't cry. She was a strong child._

* * *

_Holding on to Eren's hand, Rivaille sat down onto the bed. His eyes were staring down at the boy who was yet to be conscious._

_'_This is my fault. If only I was there sooner. If only I had explained to him what freedom wings actually mean. If only I didn't tell him all the stories about them. But… Eren remembered almost all of it, I couldn't help it. If only the 3D Manuever Gear existed in this world.'

_Rivaille gave a murky glare as his hands trembled greatly. The doctor had said that the child was alright, excluding the wound on his head. All he could do now was wait for Eren to wake up and see if the things would be alright with him._

_"It's your fault, Levi." Rivaille raised his head when he heard a girl's voice. His eyes met with Mikasa's furious glare._

_"Mikasa…" Armin raised his hands to stop her. She walked closer to Rivaille instead, eyes never leaving him._

_"It's your fault that this happened. Tell me, where are those wings you were talking about? This is not how it was supposed to be. You're a liar!" Mikasa was now biting her lower lip after the final outburst. Rivaille could only stare at her wordlessly. He didn't say anything back to her, nor did he try to defend himself. He brought his palm up to his eyes, trying to cover them as they started gleaming with tears._

_'_Why? Why do I have to meet him again? I thought when he'd remember his past life, we could be together again and have a happy life in this world. I almost endangered him. I almost made him lose his life.'

_"I'm sorry." Those were the words that Rivaille __repeated several times, over and over until they turned into a haunted whisper__. He needed to get away from Eren, so that he would never be in any more danger. He had taken the risk too far; Eren was too small to know about the most dreadful of nightmares. He tried to cover up some of the information he had given to Eren about the violence and brutality which mankind had encountered, but the outcome turned worse than he thought it would be. He should have never spoken about the past life he had._

* * *

_Grisha shot Rivaille a look when the raven-haired boy told him he would be going back to his country. He couldn't stop himself from asking though, since he knew about some of the issues with Rivaille's parents._

_"Why?"_

_"I… don't want to wound him any further. I will get away. When he wakes up, please tell him I've gone home, back to France." Rivaille was surprised when Armin stood up from his seat. The blonde opened his mouth only to shut it again, not knowing what to say. Grisha put his hand on Armin's shoulder, shaking his head._

_"Just tell Mikasa I'm moving away. I'm sure she'll be happy."_

_Armin wiped at his tears as Grisha wrapped his arms around Rivaille, pulling him closer. He had looked at the boy as if he was his own son. The first time he had walked up to him, Rivaille was alone, confused and broken. Grisha then took him into his house, listening as he spilled his frustrations about his nightmares and past. Grisha listened sadly to all those memories that __caused Rivaille to be thrown out of his parent's home.__ He was being tossed into Irvin's hands, burdening the man with another useless boy who only knew how to dream even though he was already fifteen. Irvin was feeling pity over the fact he brought Rivaille outside of his country to try and take Rivaille's mind off of his problems._

_Only later did Grisha realize his stories were similar to his son's dreams. It was then that he saw the two boys were related and meant for one another._

_"Be strong, Levi. Be strong." Grisha whispered into his ear._

_"I'm sorry, Doctor Jaeger," Rivaille contorted his face as he felt the lump forming in his throat; he let a single tear slide along his cheek. Grisha shook his head again, soothingly caressing the boy's back. He shouldn't be apologizing, it was an accident, and Grisha understood the cause of it._

_When Rivaille told Irvin that he wanted to go back to France, he insisted that he did not want to return to his parent's house. He stayed with Petra, Irvin's childhood friend. He threw his name away and changed it to Rivaille, since it was the name he was supposed to have, according to his past life._

_What he did not anticipate was Eren losing his memory upon awakening, of both Rivaille from the past and Levi of the now__._

* * *

Rivaille was long gone when Mikasa got home. She had received the news about Eren from Armin. It was almost sunset by the time Eren had regained his consciousness and she had never left his side ever since she had gotten home.

Her worried features turned to relief when Eren opened his eyes for the first time. His gaze scanned his surroundings, realizing that he was in his own room. The brunet slowly sat up, wincing as his head pounded with pain. He recalled a vivid childhood dream about the way Rivaille had caught him in his arms before he had fainted. He couldn't feel the pain, but the state of his mind made him as if he was really injured.

"Eren," Mikasa called out, causing him to turn his eyes onto her. She kept still in her chair, watching the boy's gaze slowly change from confusion into anger. Mikasa blinked in surprised when the glare was thrown at her.

"Why did you keep it a secret?" Eren's husk question made her stiffen in alertness just in time as Armin walked into the room with a tray of soup in his hands. He glanced up at them in surprise when Eren's question reached his ears.

Armin hurriedly walked over to the nightstand to put the tray down. He then moved to stand by Mikasa, and the both of them exchanged a meaningful look, before finally turning to Eren.

"Why did you keep a secret about me having lost my childhood memories?" Eren was now gritting his teeth, fisting the blanket on his lap in barely-controlled rage.

"Eren, what did you hear from Rivaille?" Mikasa rose to her feet, unfazed.

"Not much. He just said that I lost my memories when I was 7. Why did you hide it from me? I… think I remembered them now… somehow."

Mikasa looked away from the hurt written over Eren's expression. Armin was the one to step forward.

"Let me explain, Eren. We did not mean to hide it from you forever. It's just that… we wanted to avoid the painful memories from your past." Armin nodded when Eren shot him a surprised look. Mikasa touched Armin's hand, trying to stop him, but she didn't protest when Armin shook his head, signalling he intended to continue.

"Are you telling me that I also have past life memories?" Eren ran his palm over his forehead, wincing. Too many things had happened, he wasn't sure if he was ready to face all of them. Armin put his hand on his shoulder in reassurance.

"Please don't be mad at Mikasa. It was my idea, actually. That time we were in Germany, I came along with your family for the holiday. And since your father's hometown is in Germany, we stayed in your relative's house. Do you remember?" Armin stopped, letting Eren recall the events little by little. He felt relieved when Eren nodded at him.

"You told me before that you had a dream where you fell off a tree because you were trying to reach for a balloon. Then you got into an accident, do you remember that now?" Armin was now sat on the edge of the bed beside him. Mikasa sat back down, fiddling with the edge of her scarf with trembling hands.

Eren gave another nod. He remembered. Armin gave a smile as he continued; letting his best friend take in the information, just to make sure he remembered everything without a doubt.

_Carla called out Eren's name a few times when she saw that her son was stirring up. It had been five days since the accident and finally, Eren regained his consciousness. Armin's face lit up, while Mikasa quickly ran towards them, eyes gleaming with hope. As the boy sat up and green eyes finally focused on his surroundings, he let out a groan._

"_Eren, are you alright?"_

_Eren stared at his mother for a moment, wincing as the pain shot through his temple._ "_Mother?"_

_His mother was overjoyed when he called out to her, hugging him tightly. Eren's eyes focused on the two children beside her. Frowning at them, he opened his mouth to question his __curiosity__._

"_Who… are they?"_

_Armin's eyes widened when he heard him. Mikasa's mouth dropped open. Carla sucked in a breath, looking at him in bewilderment, hoping that he was just joking. Much to her chagrin, the joke never came._

"_Mikasa, call your father," she ordered, earning a nod from the girl. As Mikasa ran outside the room, Armin asked Eren if he remembered his own name. Strangely the boy nodded at him. It didn't take long for Grisha to rush inside and examin his son. After a few examinations, he came to a conclusion that Eren had lost a few of his memories. He didn't remember most of the things that had happened during the accident, nor did he remember the boy who had saved him from crashing directly to the ground. He didn't even remember his own 'vision' anymore._

_Grisha was confused about how that could have happened. He assumed that it probably because of the painful memory of him that Eren's mind was reacting that way. Deep inside the conscious state of his mind, Eren really wanted to forget the painful past life he was having. That's why he lost the memory. It was just a matter of time until Eren inevitably regained them again, but Grisha couldn't be sure when that would happen._

_He concluded that if it was triggered by something related to them, his past memories could come back. Mikasa and Armin were alerted to that last piece of evaluation._

_Much to their relief though, Eren's life could be considered as normal aside from forgetting small little things here and there. They assumed that introducing their names and other things for him wouldn't hurt. At least the boy seemed much happier. He seemed refreshed. He could laugh a lot. Armin was happy that his friend was changing. Maybe it was for the best after all. That was why he decided to tell Mikasa and his parents to just keep the past life a secret, along with the accident and Rivaille._

"Not long after that, we went back to Japan… You… also forgot about Rivaille who we were calling Levi back then. He changed his name to Rivaille now, since he disliked the aristocrat's ties in his name. I don't know why he chose Rivaille though; the pronouncement is almost identical. Maybe he has his reasons…" Armin grew silent, studying Eren's expression.

"Levi…"

Armin and Mikasa exchanged looks.

"I'm sorry, Eren. I don't want you to confuse dreams with reality. I must really be a bad person, feeling happy about the fact you lost your childhood memories. I don't want you to remember those painful dreams anymore. Maybe that Freedom Wing really does exist, you fly off towards freedom without any painful memories at all."

Eren gave him a look at that last sentence. Somehow it sounded rude. But he did not retort back. He felt hurt, not because his friends were hiding the truth from him, but because he couldn't remember his past life anymore. Maybe when he was little, he did wish those crazy nightmares would vanish. Maybe he did wish to forget about all of it.

Until he met 'Levi'. Now Eren wished to know everything, he wished to remember everything. He mistook the meaning of Freedom Wings. In the end, it was just a logo, a symbol and nothing else. It was just a 'hope' for humanity, as Rivaille had said. Knowing the fact that Rivaille still remembered those visions…

Eren bit his bottom lip. Rivaille's wings had been broken; he couldn't fly towards his freedom anymore. He was burdened with those aching feelings over him for who knows how long, as if to atone for something. Eren foggily remembered Rivaille telling him about 'taking a custody' on Eren. He remembered from one of his dreams he saw a desperate looking man, with tears and blood splatters on his cheek. What about that man? What did Rivaille have to atone? Does it have something to do with that man in his dream?

"Can you… leave me alone for now?"

Armin and Mikasa looked at each other before nodding. Both of them slowly walked outside the room, retreating as silently as they could. As soon as their steps went further and further away from the front of his room, Eren released a choked sob.

He wanted to know what had happened in the past. He wanted to know more about what was going on with their relationship. Why was he so attached to Rivaille, and why did the man seem to look at him with that hurt and yet longing gaze whenever their eyes met? Knowing that Rivaille couldn't share those memories anymore with someone who understood him fully, it had to be painful.

That night, Eren cried himself to sleep.

* * *

Rivaille's eyes stared at the street ahead of him, mind recalling each scene that happened during the day. He was supposed to be storytelling to Eren about their past as much as he could, yet it was all spoilt. Rivaille stopped the car when the red light lit up. He brought both trembling hands off the steering wheel to rub them across his face. After a few minutes of trying to hopelessly calm himself down, he slammed his fists against the steering wheel. Rivaille's broken gaze turned at the sunset before him; he felt sadness overwhelmingly crushing his heart.

He needed to create a distance… as far as he could for the last few of the months he'd spend in the country.

**TBC**

Okay, I think this chp had enough information for now. O.o'' Anyway, reviews are much appreciated! :D thank you for all the feedbacks~ -hugs all-

Made a lil strip from chp 5 ;D Go here if you want to see, just delete the spaces and [ :

asakuranohana[.[deviantart[.[com/ art/ The-Ritual-397115678


	9. Distance

**Overwhelming Emotions**

**Genre: **Drama Romance | AU | Reincarnation

**Rating:** T

**Pairing: (mainly)** Rivaille x Eren

_**Summary: **_Being woven in his dreams and memories, Rivaille was at a loss. The second encounter with a certain boy made it even much worse than he thought it would be, especially when the boy is reaching his hands out to him again.

**Disclaimer: **

I don't own Shingeki no Kyojin, but this fanfiction is mine.

©AsakuraHannah at Ffn

A/N: Chp replaced, some errors change

_**Chapter 9 : Distance**_

_Eren found himself himself unable to move. He blinked a few times to make his sight more tangible before his eyes, trying to make out a few figures. He soon found out that he was kneeling down on the ground, both of his hands were cuffed behind him. His own rasped breath could be heard as his heartbeat hammering against his chest, sweat running down his chin. He didn't know why he felt the need to break free as fast as he could. Heaving slightly, Eren struggled to move but he wasn't able to pull his hand away, the chains were attached to the heavy pole which was plunged deep into the hole in the ground. As soon as he raised his head though, he knew he was making a big mistake. His green eyes were staring up at the man before him who stood with short gasps coming from his mouth. His body was covered with blood as few pieces of blades thrust against his back, it was like someone, or some people threw several blades directly to him. Eren felt himself starting to lose control when he shout. No matter how hard he screamed, he couldn't hear his own voice. Tears spilling down his cheek while Eren gawked at the man in horror. His stance look familiar but he couldn't recognize him. All he knew, he was screaming and crying in agony which soon made him blackened out._

* * *

Eren gasped when he awakened from the nightmare in full force. He gave a shudder breath when he remembered what dream he was having. He slowly sat up, putting his hand on his chest to calm his heartbeat. After a few minutes trying to calm his breath, Eren closed his eyes. He felt slightly relieved that he was awake now. He never had any kind of nightmare that horrible before. Who was the man before him? He couldn't make out his face at all. Running his hand to his throbbing temple, Eren shook his head. He needed to forget about the nightmare for now. He threw the blanket away from his lap and swung his legs off the bed to head to the bathroom.

Eren stared at his reflection in the mirror, checking if his eyes were swollen due to the tears last night. He was glad that he didn't look like some pathetic boy who was just break up. Eren splashed his face a few times to wake himself more.

"Eren, it's time to get ready." Mikasa's muffled voice outside his room made him replied at her with a shout, letting her know that he was in the bathroom. Once he didn't receive any answer from her, he took it that she had gone away from the front of his room. He quickly took his shirts off and bath.

When he came downstairs, Mikasa had been waiting for him to eat. Breakfast had never been so quiet before, Eren noticed that Mikasa was feeling a bit faltered to pick a conversation.

When both of them walked towards the front gate without any word, Eren decided to finally broke the uncomfortable silent.

"I've made up my mind. I… I wanted to know the past, even though it hurt me." Mikasa turned her head sharply at him, Eren looked down from her bewildered look.

"Even though it hurt me." The brunet repeated, pressing the fact that he _did not_ want Mikasa to object him. He was going to talk to Rivaille over this. He wanted the older man knew that he's willing to know everything he was supposed to remember.

Mikasa could only give a small sad smile at her brother when he walked past her with full of determination on his face.

"We are… still siblings, right?" Eren stopped walking outside the gate when he heard what she was saying. He quickly turned to face her, surprised when he saw the thin smile across her lips.

"Of course, but I don't want you to start with _'I did that because I'm your sister, I care for you' _sentence." He cringed in disgust when he heard himself saying that. Mikasa couldn't stop her chuckled when it rolled out from Eren's tongue.

It was true though; she was like a mother figure, Mikasa didn't complain when she took over the job when their mother passed away. She knew she was adopted since Eren's mother couldn't have another child because of her illness, the fact that they became a family would never changed. She was Eren's childhood friend ever since they were babies. She was grateful that the Jaeger family decided to adopt her after her parent's death because of the accident. Mikasa was wittingly blaming herself for calling her father during his driving home, told him to get home faster since they brought her presents. The night when she found out her parent got their car crashed, she didn't cry until Eren comforted her with the red scarf he used to wear. He told her to cry when she wanted to, making her lose her cool by crying like a baby when she was supposed to be strong in a time like that. She was glad she got a brother, a cute one that is. The Jaeger family was happy that they could have a daughter in exchange.

Mikasa's train of thoughts disturbed when Eren voiced out his worry.

"Don't tell Dad I fainted. I didn't want him to worry." Eren reminded her. Mikasa nodded.

"He won't be back until tomorrow I think. I need to inform him that you've regained some of your lost memories, you know. You are still under treatment after all, Eren." Eren looked like he was about to object but then stopped; he knew he should at least let him know. The girl followed him when he started walking again after she closed the gate behind her.

"… I think you can enter your dad's room when he knew you've regained your memory." That statement made the boy threw a look at his sister, their eyes met for a second with Eren's eyebrow rose.

"Is there anything else that you've been keeping away from me?" Mikasa exhaled loudly.

"Nothing else other than that book Dad's been keeping you away from. Let's talk to him when he got back. Don't ask me about the book since you should read it on your own" The girl walked past him, ignoring his stillness.

"Fine." Eren rolled his eyes, he couldn't believe Armin and his own family were doing all of these to him. He'll know something soon enough. All he needed to think about now was talking to Rivaille to get to know more about his past life memories. Thinking about the man already made him excited, Eren bit his tongue. He surely didn't realize it but… He wanted to see him more and more. His hand unconsciously gripped his bag's handle tighter. It doesn't matter; he'll meet him soon and talk.

That was what Eren thought until they were in class, Eren's eyes gleaming with enthusiastic when he saw Rivaille came inside the classroom with his usual stoic face. His eyes found Eren's gaze and averted his eyes away, making Eren blinked at him. Wishing that it was just a simple ignorant act on Rivaille's side, he let it go. Deciding that he could have the whole day to talk with his teacher later, Eren focused on his lessons.

It was later when the lunch bell rang that Eren realized Rivaille rushed outside the room, as if trying to avoid any circumstance. Eren wanted to run after him, calling out for him, but he couldn't do that. He didn't want the other students have some weird idea about him chasing the teacher. Eren frowned as his mind drifted back to the previous day. Rivaille had been alright, unless there were some occurrence happened during his unconscious state.

"Armin." The blond who was taking out his lunch box looked at Eren curiously.

"After I fainted yesterday, Rivaille-san was the one brought me home, right?" Armin gave a nod, stillness in his mouth.

"I was wondering if he said something during my unconscious state." Eren's eyes were now boring through the entrance of the classroom. Armin knew what Eren was talking about.

"Rivaille-san didn't talk much. He just asked if you lost your previous life memory during the accident and also… he said 'sorry'." Armin had to lean closer to his friend to whisper his reply. Eren turned his head sharply to Armin, almost crashing their forehead in the process. He quickly drew back in surprise that Armin's face was closer than he thought.

"Sorry? What for?" Armin gave a hesitant look before answering.

"I told him you were hurt a lot during childhood, confused between dreams and reality. Maybe it's best if you better not knowing the past after all. I mean, you look so desperate and bewildered; I don't want you to end up hurting again. And he said he was sorry." Eren's eyes couldn't have gotten larger than Armin had thought. He flinched when Eren suddenly grabbed his collar forcefully, gasping at the harsh contact.

"Why? Why did you say that?" Eren's voice was pretty loud that the remaining students in class looking at them incredulously. They never thought that Eren and Armin would fight over something. Mikasa who was watching the conversation from behind quickly put her hand on Eren's grip.

"Eren, stop it." She reminded him about how easy he could lose control over his anger. Eren quickly let go of Armin, he hissed at him like a snake before walking past the blonde. As soon as he was outside the classroom, his feet brought him to run, eyes swiping the hall to search for the raven hair man. He spotted Rivaille was about to get inside the office.

"Rivaille-san." He called out. Eren's face drained when the man didn't stop or even budge to see who was calling him. He tried again but Rivaille only walked inside and closed the door before his face. The teen's feature went pale as his hand hovering on the door knob. He growled frustratingly while he ran his hands in his hair. What just happened? Everything was alright before, Eren was happy with the way things were. Now it was all crumbled into pieces. Eren threw a distressing look before he walked away from the office. He didn't want to cause commotion if he forced himself to go straight to Rivaille for having the talk.

Someone called him when he was about to head back to his classroom. He looked behind to meet with his senior, a third year student. Eren knew her, she was taking charge on the library's system, she's also a part of the student council. Her name was… Rico? Eren gave a slight bow to her when she walked up to him. There must be some errand to do.

"Jaeger, are you busy currently?" She asked when she stood directly in front of him.

"No, is there something I can help?" He offered with a smile when she nodded.

"Yes, the person who was in charge of sorting books in the library is currently on leave and there's no one to take the job for this week. We need some help with the sorting of the books that's been borrowed and returned in all sections. The boxes were starting to get full; we need someone to help out. I will take care of the payment, I knew you wanted _that_." Eren gave a nod before realizing what he just took was pretty huge in his hands.

"Wait, all sections? As in the first and second floor?" Eren went pale when Rico answered with a nod.

"I will double the payment, don't worry. You can ask someone to help you out for the sorting. I know Armin can help out; he's the most regular in the library after all. I'm sure he remembers almost all sections. Just give me the list of the books each day after you're done sorting them so I can input the lists in data." Eren pressed his lips together when he heard his best friend's name. He was slightly mad at him at the moment. _Why now?_ He gave a tired sigh mentally.

"Alright, fine." He needed some income after all. Rico gave another stoic nod before walking away.

"Thank you, Jaeger." She said without looking back. Eren scratched his head.

* * *

Mikasa stared at Eren who was sulking while he picked up some books off the large box. She volunteered when she found out about Eren's job, she was the student council after all. Helping around the school was her job. They work along with Armin even if Eren asked the blonde with a pout on his face. Armin was currently putting back some books to the other side of the hall in the library according to the books sections. Eren was taking the books little by little from the 'return' boxes back to the counter, while Mikasa type the lists of the books in the monitor to be given to Rico to input them directly in a password protection data. They were moving pretty fast for the first day, until Eren sulked with his train of thoughts.

"Eren." She tried to distract him out of his thoughts, earning a questioned look from his eyes.

"You're spacing out." Mikasa stated, making her brother exhaled noisily. He picked up some leftover books from the box, feeling happy that he had almost done with the second box. He was dejected when someone mercifully threw in another pile of books into the box, not even caring to give them into Eren's hands politely. The brunet glared at his best enemy while the taller guy smirked down at him in return.

"What are you doing here, Jean?" Eren mumbled irritatingly, putting the books on top of the counter for Mikasa to check them. He bent down to take the books Jean threw in, grunting when Jean put his arm around Eren's shoulder pretty harshly.

"Even I have to return some books." Eren rolled his eyes at that, shoving him away.

"I'm impressed you even know how to read this thick book." He eyed the book he just picked, earning a glare from the taller man. Eren smirked when Mikasa snorted at his words, not even try to hide it.

"That's not nice when I was about to give you some tips on dating and stuff." Jean moved closer to Eren when the shorter of the two gave him questioning look. As much as he was annoyed with him, Jean was pretty sharp when it's about romance. Although Jean was pretty dense about his own.

"Oh come on, it's no use trying to hide it from me. I saw you dating our internship teacher." Jean gave a wide grin when Eren dropped the books from his hands in reflex and Mikasa's surprised look was enough to make the statement became the obvious truth. Jean could have been laughing instead if he did not receive a painful jabbed in his stomach when Eren elbowed him.

"Not too loud dumbass! You hate me so much that you wanted me to be expelled and make him lose his job?" Jean growled as he clutched at his stomach with Eren glaring daggers at him. After a few seconds writhing in pain, which Mikasa and Eren pretend nothing happened, Jean let out a soft forceful chuckled.

"That's big news, you know. I could never imagine you actually going out with someone. A man too." Jean was now rubbing his stomach, throwing a smug grin to Eren. The green-eyes boy was composing himself to not to throw a punch just to wipe Jean's silly grin off his face. Mikasa threw him a warning look when their eyes met. Eren looked down at the last book he was holding, pouting as he look to his side only to notice Armin heading back to the counter with several other books in his hands.

"This is the last one from the other side. It's empty at least for today. I think we can continue tomorrow." Armin said, handing the books to Mikasa. The blonde looked at Jean and Eren puzzled, noticing the intense air surrounding them.

"It's not like that at all, Jean. You are having a big misunderstanding here." Eren mumbled, to him, avoiding eye-contact with Armin.

"What? Did he rejected you?" At that Eren clenched his fist.

"Jean, mind your own business! Can't you shut up? Why are you getting so worked up on this anyway?" Armin and Mikasa watched in full alertness as Eren starting to be more furious.

"Why are you so mad? I was just going to help you out and giving tips for… you know… in bed…" Mikasa and Armin could faintly hear an invisible rope finally snapped off. Eren pulled Jean by the collar and shoved him savagely onto the counter. The boy gasped in shock, hissing when his head slammed against the top of the counter painfully. Jean sucked in his breath when Eren glowered at him while inching his face closer.

"Listen bastard, I'm not in the mood for jokes right now. If you expect me to go blushing or spluttering, then you are wrong. You are being rude! Get the fuck away from me." Jean struggled as the grip of Eren's hand on his collar tightened. Mikasa and Armin quickly pulled Eren away from him.

"Eren, let go of him!" Mikasa said, prying his hand away from Jean's collar to let the guy breath.

"What's going on here?" Rico's shouted in full of annoyance, glowering at them. They stopped when Rico arrived, earning a soft sigh of relief from Mikasa and Armin. Rico crossed her arms in front of her chest, lips pursing at the sight in front of her.

"Listen both of you. I don't want to see anymore ruckus in the library. Jaeger, unless you want me to pay you well, behaves yourself and do something with your temper! Jean, I could get you suspended for trying to pick a fight with your friend. Now, all of you go home! I won't tolerate these behaviors anymore." She turned around to leave them alone after glaring daggers for the last time.

"Damn it, Eren! Why are you so vicious?" Jean massaged his neck after he straightened up himself.

"You are the one who started it!"

"I was just joking around as usual! You are no fun!" Jean smacked his shoulder quiet harshly, making the shorter boy gasped at him.

"Stop it!" Mikasa scolded them, making Jean jumped at the loud voice coming from her. That's not enough to make Eren stop though.

"You should know that I'm not in the mood for jokes! Can't you read the atmosphere for once? You are pathetic! If it's not because of Armin, I already-"

"Eren!" This time Armin shouted at him. Eren stopped, surprised by his sudden outburst. He quickly realized what he had almost spilled out. The blonde was now furious.

"Look, I'm sorry if Rivaille distance himself from you because of my words, but that doesn't mean you can go around leaking my privacy!" Armin hastily walked past them after he ticked off. Eren frowned at him, watching him walk outside the library through the back door. Mikasa gave a loud sigh, she was tired with these boys. Really, they are so childish.

"What… What about Armin? I don't understand what you were trying to say here." Jean scratched the back of his neck, fully confused.

"You…!" Eren was about to throw punch at him for being an idiot only to stop when Mikasa stomped on his foot painfully. Eren cupped his mouth, trying so hard not to laugh out loud. He felt relieved when Jean crouched down, holding onto his aching feet.

"Jean, you are such an air-head. It would be wise if you also look around you for a bit. Eren, do something with your bad habit. You should learn to control your emotions. Apologize to Armin." With that she walked away from the two. Eren threw the last book he was holding back into the box. It fell with a pretty loud thud, making Jean jolt in surprise at the sound. As the brunet ran past him, Jean stayed immobile. He was confused on what he was supposed to do.

"I don't know anymore." He groaned out loud. His plan on trying to help out seemed failed miserably.

* * *

Armin raised his head when he heard footsteps approaching him. The sun was starting to set when Eren drew near his long time friend. Armin was crouching down near the vending machine, looking forlorn. When he saw Eren pacing slowly to him, he looked away. He did not object though, when Eren leaned against the wall, carefully made some distance beside him.

"I'm sorry…" Eren mumbled when Armin didn't say anything of him being there. He looked down to Armin when the blonde remind silent, playing with the can he was holding. Eren soughed and crouched down, sitting on the dirty ground.

"I shouldn't have said that… though I wonder if you ever… realize that… he won't look at you, no matter how much you try. Seeing that Jean is always with Marco." Eren whispered, staring at him closely. Armin finally raised his head to look back into Eren's green eyes.

"That's why it's better left unsaid. I'm not even planning to confess. How come you know about it anyway?" Eren rolled his eyes.

"How many years we've been best friends?" Armin looked down at the sentence, his lips curved into a smile.

"Is this the first time we fight?" Eren chuckled when he heard him.

"You are right… We… never fight before. I'm sorry for… being such a jerk towards you." Eren clasped his hands together while hugging his legs.

"I just don't want you to suffer anymore. It's hurt seeing you like that. When you were little, you look miserable, never laugh. You look in pain with those heavy burden around you when you told me your nightmares. I'm sad that I can't do anything about it. Sometimes you even shout in your sleep, waking up full of sweat when I woke you. Maybe you don't remember anymore, but it's terrifying, Eren. That's why, when you lost your memory including your past life, I felt relief. I felt like the other part of you can finally leave you alone. I'm sorry!" Armin clutched his head, shouting his apologize. Eren shook his head.

"I'm sorry, I didn't mean to be so mean. I planned to tell you that I've made up my mind. I want to know the past; I want to know what happened. Rivaille said he wanted to atone something. I was curious of what happened to me, to us, in the past. That's why I'm so surprised when you said he was sorry. He ignored me today but I will try to talk to him tomorrow." Armin gave a nod.

"I understand." They looked into each other before Eren grinned. He stood up, offered his hand for Armin who took it with a smile on his face.

"We are still friends, right?" Armin asked, when he stood up, staring at Eren's wide grin.

"Of course, what kind of question is that?" the brunet laughed when he saw the look Armin giving him.

"Let's go home." Eren said, his friend nodded in agreement. Someone came out from the building just when they were about to walk to the gate. Eren looked at the man in surprised when Rivaille came outside, huffing at the boys when he saw them.

"Why are you two still here? Students should go home right after class." Rivaille said before quickened his pace. Armin patted Eren's shoulder, telling him to chase after Rivaille with the gesture.

"Rivaille-san!" Eren shouted, calling out to him. He threw a pain look when Rivaille didn't stop walking.

"Why are you ignoring me? Listen to me, I…"

"You are annoying. What do you want?" Eren stopped, aghast when Rivaille turned around to snarl him. When the brunet didn't say anything, he clicked his tongue.

"What? Why are you suddenly so clingy to me? Don't tell me that you believe everything I said to you during the last weekend?" Rivaile pulled out a fake smirk when Eren stayed still. Those green eyes gleaming in surprised, clearly Eren didn't expect him to say those sentences.

"You…" Eren stopped when Rivaille let out a soft chuckle.

"I was just trying to get your trust, wondering how fast you'll trust me. It's not fun anymore." He rolled his raven eyes and turned around from Eren. A car drove near the gate and Rivaille walked further away from the boy.

"No, that's not what I mean! Why are you lying? Rivaille-san!" Eren hastily ran to catch up with him but Rivaille had gone into the car, Irvin looked at Eren questioning. Rivaille just slammed the door shut, telling Irvin to start driving.

"Levi-san!" Eren shouted as loud as he could, tried to run after the car, tripping himself in the process.

"Eren!" Armin ran towards him, he fell on his knees beside his friend, eyes shifting between the car and Eren.

"You are a bad liar, Levi!" Eren shouted as his body trembling in rage.

"Eren, I don't think Rivaille had any reason to lie to you." Armin said, pulling Eren's arm to help him on his feet. Eren gritted his teeth when his eyes gleaming with tears. Eren looked down, he knew... He knew the man was lying.

'_Damn it, Rivaille! What do you think I am? I won't be easily fooled! You are a bad liar!'_

"Let's go home. I will stay the night with you." Eren slowly stood up.

"I know… I know he's not lying." Eren breathes, Armin watched at him sadly. A limo ran head towards their direction, making Eren and Armin looked behind. They were surprised when Jean opened the window and pouting at both of them.

"Get in." He commanded shortly, offering them that he would take them home with his limo. Eren and Armin had no reason to object him.

* * *

Irvin looked at Rivaille who stayed silent. He still didn't know what was going on, but he was sure that his ears were not playing tricks on him. Eren didn't just called Rivaille…

"Are you sure it's okay? Did he just called you Levi?" He looked back to the street when Rivaille didn't reply. His cousin looked like he was just being sucker punched. The dreadful look on Rivaille's face was enough to not to ask about anything at the moment.

Rivaille clenched on his pants with trembling fists.

'What have I done?'

**TBC**

Reviews are much appreciated. thank you :D Let me know what you think.


	10. Reaching You Again

**Overwhelming Emotions**

**Genre: **Drama Romance | AU | Reincarnation

**Rating:** T

**Pairing: (mainly)** Rivaille x Eren

**_Summary: _**Being woven in his dreams and memories, Rivaille was at a loss. The second encounter with a certain boy made it even much worse than he thought it would be, especially when the boy is reaching his hands out to him again.

**Disclaimer: **

I don't own Shingeki no Kyojin, but this fanfiction is mine.

©AsakuraHannah Ffn

**_Chapter 10 : Reaching You Again_**

Jean decided to stay for dinner after finding out that Mikasa had prepared sandwiches. His reasoning apparently was that Eren got Armin to stay over the night. She was practically furious when Jean was the one who brought them home, not because it was Jean, but because she hadn't prepared dinner for nearly that many.

"I'm hungry." Eren groaned, only to stop his whining when he received a death glare from Mikasa.

"It's your fault for bringing so many people without warning. Help me prepare these sandwiches! I will prepare the fries and salad!" She said, earning another grunt from Eren. Her brother did what she told while the guests snickered at him.

"Do you need some help?" Armin asked all of the sudden, he went back to his seat when Eren waved at him to stay where he was.

"It's alright, guests should just be quiet." Eren said, cutting the sandwiches without difficulties.

"Oh no, I forgot that we only got one tomato left." Mikasa slammed the refrigerator shut.

"It's okay, we'll just have what you have right now. No need to prepare so much for us." Jean stuttered as Mikasa gave another complaint. He felt bad for going to a friend's house uninvited.

"Well, considering you are the richest here, we'll feel bad about not preparing anything, Your Majesty." Eren rolled his eyes, letting out a sarcastic joke. Mikasa and Armin groaned inwardly.

"Eren, if you pick another fight I'm sure this knife will fly towards your direction in any second." Mikasa lifted it up in the air, making Eren swallowed nervously. He went back to the task at hands, putting the sandwiches on the empty plates in neat order. Jean chose to ignore Eren's sarcasm, afraid that the knife would change its direction towards him as well.

"Okay, only the fries left." Eren said after a few minutes, putting each plate on top of the table.

"Eren, can you check the fries? I think it's about time. I need to clean some bowls for the salad." Eren nodded and walked towards the stove and turned it off. The two friends watched them in stillness, slightly feeling out of place. Jean grunted at the sight in front of him.

"Dammit, They'd look like a wedded couple if it wasn't for the fact that they're siblings. But then again, they're not real siblings." Jean muttered, making Armin chuckle at him.

"Eren got his heart taken though." Armin muttered back to Jean. The taller guy lifted his eyebrow at the statement, changing his gaze towards Armin.

"Are you sure about that? I mean the way he acted today, it was like he was being dumped or something." Armin gave a nervous laugh, he knew the cause, but some things were better left unsaid to Jean. He knew how the boy couldn't stay calm towards other people's problems. It was actually not a bad thing, but some people might find it a bit disturbing.

"Let's see where this will lead to." The blond said, watching as Eren scooped the fries up to the plate. They were going to have a very nice and chattery dinner, he couldn't help but to get excited. Armin was glad that Eren's mind could be taken off from the previous event. He needed some time off from his problems.

"I'm still amazed by the fact that you brought your limo here. Is… that even yours?" Armin tried to make him talk. Jean cleared his throat at the query and shifted in his seat before answering.

"Well, that's not really mine, it's Dad's. I just… everyday, I called home to pick me up and stuff. That's why I usually went home pretty late, trying to avoid the other students seeing me like that. But hey, I insisted on walking up to school only from a few kilometers away." He said, full of pride. Eren grimaced when he heard him.

"You sure it's alright to make your driver wait here?" Armin pressed.

"It's alright. I decided to bring you guys home after all… Just… wanted to show some apology for my behavior, I guess?" He looked at Eren who had his arms crossed while staring at him.

"Are you saying that you felt guilty of your rude behavior and decided to apologize to me with bringing a limo? I think if you decided on that, you should treat us something instead of making Mikasa cook. Unless you only want to taste her cooking, but home-made sandwiches? Seriously, Jean. Marco will cry." Jean was now spluttering while Armin tried so hard not to laugh too loud while Mikasa snorted on the corner of the kitchen. She was halfway putting the salad inside two bowls and was ready for the finishing touch with the sauce.

"That's not what I meant, idiot!" Jean slammed his fist on top of the table, blushing furiously. Rolling his eyes, the brunet placed the fries on top of the sandwiches, measuring the amounts to be the same on each plate. Eren stuck out his tongue at the tallest boy.

"You must be having your life pretty neat and easy everywhere, Mr. Horse-face." Jean sighed and hesitantly rubbing the back of his neck.

"Let's not talk about it…" Eren raised an eyebrow when the taller boy ignored his name calling. Was he trying to be courteous?

"You should be happy." He muttered and dragged the chair to take a seat. One of the reasons why he disliked Jean was because he was pretty rich and had his life easy. He wasn't sure if the boy had ever encountered a harsh life before, but he didn't have any reason to hate the boy. Maybe he was annoyed by that fact since he couldn't even earn his own car anymore now. The only car they got was his father's to use when he went out of town for work. The only thing that's important now was that they had enough income to pay for school and their living. Even if the money their father send each month was enough when piled up to at least got one more car for them to use, Grisha had warned them to not to stop school no matter how hard their life was. Mikasa had taken charge of the money for their school and their living such as food and other things much better spend. For now, it was enough, besides, the school they were in right now was not that far from home. Thinking that he shouldn't let that kind of thoughts bothered him, Eren shoved the thoughts away.

The dinner took place in the most havoc as ever, especially with Jean and Eren sat while facing each other with Mikasa and Armin tried to hold their killing intention on the two of them. They had no idea why both boys could never able to hold a few seconds without mockery and sarcastic remarks here and there. Armin and Mikasa couldn't be more than glad when Jean finally decided to go home. After the 'horse-face' as to what Eren liked to call Jean left, Eren dragged Armin up to his room to talk about the event that happened a few hours ago.

It was getting close to midnight by the time Eren brought his comforter up above his head while Armin crawled closer on the bed next to him. Both of them had the light off and excitedly climbed on the bed as soon as they got inside the room. The only light remained was from the small lamp on the windowsill that Eren put up, it was dim but enough for Armin to still read his book he had brought with him. The two made themselves comfortable against the pillow with their stomach on the bed, propping their bodies up to their elbows. Eren looked down curiously at the book Armin was holding.

"Reading before sleep as usual?" The question made Armin's lips curve up.

"I don't mind if you want to spill your frustration during my reading time. I can listen." The blonde said, meeting his blue eyes with Eren's emerald orbs. Eren gave a sigh and slammed his face against the pillow.

"I don't even know what to say about him." His voice muffled by the pillow but Armin gave a short nod.

"I want you to know that he was desperate on carrying you in his arms every time you fainted, Eren. It's two times already." Eren shot his head up, making Armin jolt at the sudden movement. Armin held his laughter when he saw how red his best friend's face was.

"He cared for you, Eren. I'm sure he lied to you about what happened in school a few hours ago. He wanted to protect you from any danger that had happened in the past after seeing you faint two times. I'm afraid it would trigger your worst past life nightmare. As far as I see, you suddenly remembered your childhood memory when you fainted, right? It was like seeing a dream that suddenly got real. I know I've said to him about the way you were desperate during your childhood, he probably thought it's better to make some distance and let you get your own life ahead of you without him. After all, when he left to France that time, he made it clear that he… didn't want to cause you any further danger."

Eren went silent, listening to Armin's words always helping. He was smarter than anybody when it was about the situations around him. He looked down to his pillow, sulking when he thought about Rivaille's words to him.

"I know he's lying, but… He could have said it in a different way." Armin chuckled at the complaint.

"This is Rivaille we are talking about after all."

"Why won't you try to talk to him again tomorrow?" Armin patted his shoulder, making Eren groane and roll to his side facing his best friend.

"I will. No, I must." He covered his eyes with his hand as he shifted on the bed to lie comfortably. Armin gave a small warm smile at Eren. He thought Eren had noticed his own feeling toward the man, the smaller boy was surprised on what Eren asked him next.

"Armin. Why am I so attached to him? I'm not talking about the past life, here." Armin stiffened when Eren's green eye gazed him questioning from between his fingers where he could see Armin's face turned crimson.

"Eren…" he paused for a moment while Eren gave him a clueless gaze, waiting for an answer.

"Find that out yourself." Armin quickly closed his book and turned his back to his best friend when the brunet threw him a disappointed look. He was glad that Eren decided to drop the subject and turned the dim light off.

* * *

Grisha dropped his bag when he heard the news about his son from Mikasa as soon as he arrived on their doorstep. He quickly ran upstairs to his room, knocking the door several times with a pounding heartbeat in his chest. The door opened with Eren looking up at him, frowning. His eyes lightened up when he saw his father before the door.

"Dad? You are early, I thought you wouldn't be home until tomorrow?" Eren looked back to where Armin had sat up on the bed when Eren opened the door. Grisha noticed his friend and he gave a small nod, acknowledging his presence.

"I heard what happened from Mikasa." He stated, staring down at Eren who threw him an astonished look.

"I see… I'm fine now, though." He gave his father a reassuring smile as not to make him worried. Grisha put his hand on his son's shoulder.

"What did you remember?" he whispered, pulling his son closer to him in a warm hug after he saw the look on his son. Eren shook his head.

"Nothing much, just a childhood memory and a few dreams and nightmares" Grisha gave a nod knowingly.

"Dr. Jaeger, maybe you should show Eren his medical record book." Armin said, having stood before the two of them with a firm look on his face. Grisha gave another nod, agreeing to the blond immediately. Eren's brows furrowed when he heard about the book.

"What have you been keeping secret from me?" His brow furrowed at the two before Grisha mentioned Eren to follow him downstairs. Eren gave him a quizzical look until Armin patted his back..

"Follow him and you'll understand." Armin pushed Eren out of his room and led him downstairs following Grisha.

When they were downstairs, Eren was surprised once he saw Mikasa standing before his father's opened room, fully inviting him to come inside. He timidly looked inside, scanning the surroundings, feeling slightly relieved that he didn't find anything weird in the room like he had expected. Armin pushed him inside just in time when Grisha turned around from his work desk. Eren took the book that his father showed him, his eyes examined the cover of the book. He hesitantly looked up to his father, unsure if he should open it.

"Read it. It's yours now." Grisha said. He told Eren to sit down on the bed with Mikasa and Armin each by his sides. Now that the three of them stared down at the book, Eren felt nervous. The book didn't look like anything special, it was an old book with so many scrapes on it. Not only that, from the edge of the paper, he could see some pages were torn apart. His fingers traced the side of the book, it wasn't very thick, but not very thin either. When he finally decided to open it, Eren found his old photo pasted on the page which he noticed he was seven when it was taken. He flipped the page and his mouth hung open when he saw a boy around the age of 15, staring right into the camera with Eren in his arms. His expression was stoic than ever, but the hint of happiness in his eyes was evident. As he looked closer, he saw a thin smile on the boy's lips with Eren circling his small arm around his neck. Eren's other hand form a peace sign while grinning widely at the camera. His eyes glistened when a flash image came into his mind. He remembered the boy's surprised look when he called out to him by his past life name.

"That's Rivaille." Armin said, pointing his forefinger to the boy with a smile at what time Eren's fingers lightly traced on the photo. Grisha sat on the chair in front of his desk, eyeing the three of them.

"Rivaille?" Armin nod at the inquiry of Eren's father.

"Levi, I mean. He changed his name to Rivaille."

"I see… I think it was written somewhere in there, that Rivaille name. It got some connection of his past life, I guess. No wonder." Grisha's lips curved up at the memory.

Eren flipped another page and he read the descriptions written on it. It was written about how he reacted towards a certain things, about his surroundings and about the way he communicated with people around him. Each was written hastily with some detail date and time, clearly a doctor's handwriting.

"How come I didn't know when I'm being examined thoroughly?" Eren pursed his lips and flipped another page to find Armin's photo with him clinging to the boy as if refusing to let him go. His green eyes flickered towards his father. Grisha spoke up when his son wanted some explanation.

"When you were little, you always complained on your nightmare. You told us something about a war, you were a soldier, and you fought the monsters called Titans everyday to help humankind. At first I thought you were just being a child with so many dreams, but lately I realized that you were even confusing your dream to reality. It was painful to watch when one day you woke up screaming. You said something about the Titan will crush our house and eat your mother. It was confusing to tell you that now you had a different life, that we live normally now. There's one day when you just wouldn't go out of the house because you were too scared to fight." Grisha paused for a moment to let the information sunk into his son's mind. Armin chuckled and spoke up.

"The time when you met me, you were crying, you were concerned about my well being after you passed away. I'm so shocked when I heard it and worried about your sanity. In the end we figured out that the people in your dreams were actually from the past life."

Eren remained silent while he listened to their stories, flipping the page and found the story about Armin written on the next page. As he continued flipping the pages, he saw Rivaille's photo. Under the photo, there was a small hand written. Eren traced the black ink with his fingers.

_Rivaille Heichou. _Eren hadn't realized he was saying quite loud, jerked his head up to his father when he gave another explanation.

"That boy, Rivaille, was the one you called out often. You kept calling him Rivaille Heichou. When I met Levi, he was not in a good condition with his family. I was worried he might do something he'd regret, so I had him come over to our house and had him spill everything during the visit. He told me about his past life memory and the reasons he was in Germany. His cousin brought him there along to take the boy's mind off the problems while he got work to do in the country. What surprised me the most was when he told me about you. He mentioned your name." Eren's eyes gleamed with hope when Grisha told him about the boy who was now his teacher.

"I think I remembered." He murmured. Grisha gave a smile and nod.

"You were too little to understand anything surrounding you. The time you saw him, you shouted at his title. You called out 'Rivaille Heichou' pretty loudly, surprising him." Eren felt a lump on his throat, making it harder to swallow.

"I did, didn't I?" He forced out his voice with a dry chuckle. He felt his eyes sting when his vision starting to get blurred by the tears. He bit his lower lip when he looked down, trying to forget the need to bawl like a baby.

"Dad, can I keep this book? I want to know everything I need to know." Eren asked, closing the book and hugged it closely to his chest. Even if it had been just the record of his medical treatment on how he react during the remnants of his past life, Eren felt the need to know every piece that he had lost. He wanted to know how he reacted towards the older man when he was still seven, he wanted to know more about the current Rivaille in this life as well. He was glad that Grisha gave another nod of approval.

"You can have it, read it for all you want. Just don't force yourself when it hurts too much." Eren gave a silent nod as a reply.

"Thank you." Armin and Mikasa looked at each other, both comforting their friend by putting their hands on his shoulders. In a time like that, Eren felt like he was the smallest of the three siblings. He was glad that he might at least get pieces of his childhood memories little by little. Now the only one left was to let Rivaille opening up to him.

His fingers unconsciously grip the edge of the book a little harder that it turned white.

* * *

_Rivaille was confused he wasn't sure where he was heading. The boy around the age of seven pulling him into the dark forest, the boy sure knew where he was heading. Rivaille stopped when the boy stopped walking, his green eyes gleaming sadly at him when he turned around to look up to Rivaille. The oldest of the two slowly broke their hands away from each other. He wasn't sure what to say while he brought himself kneeling down before the boy, staring deep into his green eyes. He recognized those green orbs._

_"Eren…" Rivaille stopped when the boy's lips curved up into a smirk. Much to Rivaille's dismay, Eren's clean smooth face suddenly covered with splotches of blood. He felt himself going rigid on his spot when Eren leaned closer to him, murmuring against his ear with full of amusement in his voice._

_"Do you remember this place? Inside the forest, near the lake…" Rivaille's pupils trembled as the memory recalled him. He suddenly felt difficult to swallow the lump in his throat._

_"The place where we both ended our life. No. Actually, the place where you ended my life." Eren laughed before his ear, which turned louder when Rivaille backed away. He couldn't look away from those green eyes which turned into darker red. Rivaille opened his mouth to shout, trying to shield his eyes when he saw blood trickling down Eren's forehead. He desperately screamed, trying to shield his vision before his eyes._

Rivaille gasped when he was awakened from his nightmare. He abruptly sat up on his bed, trying to forget about what his nightmare. Rivaille gave a shaky breath, clutching his shirt with a wince. Realizing that he was sweating hard, the man gave a grunt of discomfort.

"What the hell…" He muttered to himself, he brought his hand across his face. He needed to wake himself more with a cold water. He threw his blanket aside and quickly walked towards the bathroom. He didn't need another nightmare, he didn't want to remember that he was the cause of Eren's suffering. He needed to take the blame off from his shoulders. Ever since Rivaille got a nightmare, it was always ended up being blamed for the cause of Eren's death. Be it in the previous life, or in the current life. They were always the same, they were blaming him for what happened even if Eren didn't lose his life in the present…

Rivaille threw his clothes in the hamper filled with dirty clothes in a frustrating manner. He knew about it, he tried to atone it with entering the military, but even he couldn't deny the fact that even if he got hurt, even if he got shot or even if he was wounded badly, nothing he could do to repay what he had done. The man punched the nearest wall, gritting his teeth in annoyance.

"What am I supposed to do?! It's not like I haven't tried at all." Growling in full of frustration, Rivaille tried to compose himself from giving another fit of anger. After a few minutes calming himself down, he slowly walked into the shower and spray cold water on his head.

* * *

Rivaille eyes drifted to his desk, wondering if there's something he should bring to class today. His eyes scanned the intership reports he had finished the night before along with some other stuff that should be signed by his lecturer. Rivaille slowly picked up one of the papers he had finished. Pixis had made it clear to send the reports via email to him last night, but he hadn't finished the last paragraph of his thesis. The man frowned, considering the amount of work he should be doing within the end of the month. He flipped through his paperwork and found a small note at the very corner of his report.

_'Continue the draft for first book'_ Rivaille quickly threw the papers down. He clutched his head when a sudden ache shot through his temple.

"Oh no. This… I shouldn't have started from the first place." He cursed himself before shoving the report into the desk drawer. He gathered his things and walked outside the room, ready for breakfast.

Irvin had the toast and eggs ready on the plates when he arrived in the kitchen. The taller guy looked up from the newspaper he was reading to see his cousin walked to the table with a frown on his face. He gave a soft sigh and shook his head before burying his face underneath the newspaper again. Rivaille scoffed at the guy's reaction after Irvin saw him coming.

"If you got any complain, let it out." He mumbled and took a seat across Irvin.

"I was just wondering about the frown on your face. It's only morning and you are already so hard on yourself." Irvin replied without lowering the newspaper. Rivaille immediately pressed his forefinger to the middle of his eyebrows as if trying to smoothen it.

"Well, I got a hard life ahead of me." Irvin looked up to him right after he said that, chuckling when Rivaille raised his brow puzzled.

"If you think your life is hard, it will be harder to walk on your path, Rivaille. Loosen up a bit." Irvin folded the newspaper in his hands neatly before he brought his chair closer to the desk, ready to eat his breakfast.

"I want to move back to France. Irvin, can you do something about my internship?" Irvin was taken back by the sudden request.

"Rivaille, you know you can't always run away from your problems. Even if you want to go back, you should at least finish your internship first. This is your last semester." Irvin was not happy when Rivaille glared at him. He raised his hand to stop another comment coming from his cousin.

"The answer is no." he said and picked up his knife and fork to start eating. He ignored Rivaille scowling before him while they eat.

"How's the report going? What about the draft of the book you are writing?" Rivaille's fork clattered on the plate at the question.

"Don't ask." Rivaille glowered at his breakfast meal. He didn't feel like continuing the book anymore now that everything had gotten out of hands. He wasn't even sure if he still wanted to put the characters in his dreams into his writing. Changing the plot was now impossible, especially when he still got so much list of the characters personality and plots to be given in this last month. Rivaille was frustrated.

_'I don't even know if I can continue finishing the book with… Eren as one of the characters in the draft. Why do I even think of writing it…'_ Rivaile pressed his palm over his forehead, sighing slightly. He remembered last night event, he remembered his own words, he remembered the way Eren shouted his former name. Rivaille gritted his teeth.

"I've wounded him yet again."

* * *

The day had never been so long for both Eren and Rivaille. They waited impatiently for the end of the day with Rivaille hoping to avoid his student and Eren tried to pick some attention from the assistant teacher. Especially after Rivaille finished his lectures about writing an essay paragraph and dividing plots one each use during the class, Eren had raised his hand along with several other students for questions section. Rivaille had deliberately ignored him for a few times until the bell rang, signaling the end of the day. Rivaille would never think about giving the boy detention at the very end of the day when Eren suddenly made a commotion. There the boy, stood right in front of Jean, looking terribly pissed over something.

"Jean, didn't you say you wanted to help me yesterday?" Eren suddenly asked in a husky whisper, eyes never leaving Rivaille when the man starting to gather his things. Jean who was busy shoveling his books into the bag lifted his eyes to him questioningly. He was surprised when Eren's hand suddenly yanked his collar in full force.

"Wha-"

"Help me to get a detention." He smirked, giving him the signal. Jean hesitated for a moment before pushing Eren from him in full force, making the brunet tumble a few steps backwards, and fall to the cold hard floor after hitting the table behind him. That was enough to draw all eyes to them.

"Don't get me in trouble!" Jean shouted at the shorter boy, eyeing Rivaille warily when the man glowered at the two. Mikasa and Armin groaned tiredly when they saw the two of them; they should have known the tactic. The two best friends shook their head to Jean who threw them a panic look.

"Jaeger!" Rivaille's shout could be heard until outside the classroom. Those emerald eyes looked up at him for a moment before he scrambled back to his feet, patting a few dust off his pants nervously. It was true that he was aiming to get a detention, but when their eyes met, Rivaille looked scarier than ever.

"I…"

"Detention like, right now. I was in a hurry for my reports to be done, you get yourself in so much trouble." Those raven eyes were glaring daggers at Eren who was now regretting his tactic. For the first time that day, it's Eren's turn to avert his eyes away. The teacher knew he did it on purpose on the commotion.

* * *

"What the hell do you want?!" Rivaille hissed right after all students left the classroom, he had Eren backed into the corner. The sunset light which on the back of the window made the brunet hair seemed glowing, Rivaille had to force himself not to stare at the soft tussled hair of his.

"I just wanted to talk." Their eyes hardened for a few minutes before Rivaille let out a groan. Eren let out the breath he had unconsciously been holding when he saw that Rivaille didn't attempt any harm.

"I thought I made it clear that-"

"No, don't lie to me. I knew you were lying last night, Levi." The press on the name made Rivaille flinched, his face contorted at the name.

"Don't call me that." Rivaille's snarled. Eren blinked at the command, he bit his lip.

"I just want to say that I remember my childhood."

"Yeah right, awesome. I don't care." Before he was able to leave, Eren tugged his hand in his into his.

"Wait, listen!" Eren stared at Rivaille's back, gulping at what he was about to say next. He just hoped that he wouldn't screw this up.

"Corporal. Rivaille Heichou." As soon as he let the words spill out, Rivaille abruptly turned around. Eren was shocked when he saw Rivaille's face look so pale. The next thing he knew, Rivaille had pushed him away like he was some kind of a bug that could spread disease just by a simple touch. Eren hit the window behind him, a soft surprised gasp came out when he accidentally knocked the back of his head against the glass pane.

"What are -" Eren stopped his sentence when he noticed the look on the man before him. The hand that had pushed him away trembling greatly while Rivaille took a few steps back. He couldn't believe on what he was seeing. Was it something he said?

"What did you just call me?" Rivaille asked in a very soft tone that Eren could barely hear.

"Am I not supposed to call you that? You have explained to me before that you were my superior…" Eren mumbled, unsure whether he should look directly into his black eyes which were gleaming in sorrow.

"Don't call me that anymore. I… I don't deserve it." Rivaille fingers curled into fists, his face distorted in a false smile, brow furrowed with so much regret. Eren stayed still, unsure of what he was supposed to say. Somehow, Rivaille's expression scared him a little. He thought when he remembered his memories, he could get closer to him. He thought the man would open up to him. He did not expect Rivaille to make more distance instead of running back towards his direction. His heart almost stopped when Rivaille shook his head and turned away from him.

"If you don't remember anything at all from the previous life, it's better that way, Eren. Don't force yourself to remember anything."

"I want to remember, even if it hurts me!" Eren chocked, voicing his own thought.

"You don't understand anything! It's better if you don't remember, Eren. At first I thought about telling you everything so we could be together. I noticed I'm being egoistic, I'm doing it for myself, never considered your own suffering. I was hurt when I lost you during the past life, you don't understand how painful it is to lose someone so dear to you." Rivaille pressed his palm on his forehead, feeling the air turn much hotter than before. Before he realized, he was sweating in fear of losing someone again.

"Please, don't raise your hands to reach me again. You deserve to be happy, Eren."

"Don't say things I don't understand! What happened that made you like this? What have I done to you? What did you do?! I need explanations!" Eren was now approaching his teacher, both of his hands were now pulling on Rivaille's shirt despite the fact Rivaille had told him to stay away.

"You haven't done anything! In fact, it's me who has done something!"

"But…" Rivaille shrugged the hands away when Eren insisted on pulling his shirt to make him stay. As he turned around to face him, Eren slowly let go, noticing the expression the man wore. He took a few steps back when Rivaille's face darkened.

"Fine, I will tell you… I will tell you what we are now, you insist." Eren gulped by the tone of his voice, his heartbeat getting louder on his chest while he waited for Rivaille to speak up.

"I'm your lover in the past life, but I had to kill you. I killed you with my own two hands." Eren's eyes met with the pierce look Rivaille threw to him. He slumped himself against the window with dry mouth slightly opened. Eren's face turned dreadful when the raven never left him until Rivaille blinked and took a deep breath. He heard the man exhaling shakily, taking in the fact that Eren went immobile to what he had said. He didn't want to think that he just spilled the truth about them being lovers. He hadn't intended to say it right away and hastily looked aside after feeling the need to punch the nearest wall. He couldn't believe he was that careless. Was he that desperate to make Eren became his again?

"Now that you knew about it, you can let go. Its my sin I have to atone and you better live a happy life in this world." The lecturer gave him one last sad look before he walked away, leaving the boy slumped against the wall with the truth. Eren might not know much regarding his identity, but it's better left unsaid before he made him go crazy with consuming too much nightmares.

He was about to open the door to the classroom when Eren finally spoke up.

"I dreamed about you." Rivaille stopped his fingers before the door knob, listening wordlessly. He heard footsteps coming closer to him but Rivaille didn't turn to face him.

"I felt so lifeless in that dream, but someone was crying before my eyes while cradling me in his arms. I don't know who it was. He leaned closer to me, kissing me on my forehead, cheek, and lips." Rivaille's eyes widened, he abruptly turned around to face Eren. He wore a pained expression on his face by the time the boy stood directly before him. His green eyes were gleaming with tears in full sadness.

"I remember calling the man 'Corporal'. When I called you that, you acknowledged it. Rivaille Heichou was what's written in my dad's medical record he showed me on last night. He knew it was time for me to at least read some details of my memory lost from his medical record he had on me and my past life. I… I felt the need to let you know that I've prepared myself for the worst that happened in the past life. The truth is not what I had expected. When I remembered the way you showered me with kisses in the dream, you were so tender. I don't know why you wanted me to think of you in a bad way, Rivaille." Rivaille felt his heart clench tightly when he heard the last sentence. Eren brushed away the tears on his cheek when he noticed his tear running down freely as he explained the dream. Rivaille wanted so much to brush the tears away, holding himself back was painful.

"Eren…" Eren's green eyes lightened up when he called him softly.

"Are you stupid? You should think of me in a bad way, because I'm a bad person. I don't deserve you at all and ended your life in misery…"

"Rivaille!" Eren started but Rivaille stoped him by raising his hand.

"We are different now." With that Rivaille opened the door leaving Eren alone in the classroom. Eren's cupped his mouth when the man vanished into the corner, he felt hurt by the rejection. Wasn't it Rivaille who was reaching up to him at first? Why couldn't he just be honest with himself? If he was going to be this difficult, he shouldn't have started telling the stories at all about the giants, freedom wings, and 3D maneuver gear. Eren refused to let another tear come out when he remembered the time they went out together.

_'Armin, I think I know how I'm feeling towards Rivaille now.' _He clutched his eyes shut.

**_TBC_**

**_I you want to see the strip based on this chp, the link is here, just remove the dot and space:_**

_ asakuranohana**dot**deviantart**dot**com/art/That-photo- 405185089_


	11. Four Promises

**Overwhelming Emotions**

**Genre: **Drama Romance | AU | Reincarnation

**Rating:** T

**Pairing: (mainly)** Rivaille x Eren

_**Summary: **_Being woven in his dreams and memories, Rivaille was at a loss. The second encounter with a certain boy made it even much worse than he thought it would be, especially when the boy is reaching his hands out to him again.

**Disclaimer: **

I don't own Shingeki no Kyojin, but this fanfiction is mine.

©AsakuraHannah Ffn

**A/N:** Oh God… Please bear with the cheesy drama in the chp x"D because there's some fluff

_**Chapter 11 : **_**Four Promises**

Eren's eyes looked around the dark classroom. He didn't realize the sun had set while his mind was busy with so many things. He wondered what time it was as his eyes gazed outside the building from the glass pane window. The only light coming into the room was from the moonlight, Eren wondered if Jean had gone home with his limousine.

Rivaille had probably gone home a while ago. His eyes scanned the empty classroom not knowing if he really wanted to go home with mixed feelings. The brunet exhaled softly and plopped down on the front desk, staring into the blackboard with an empty gaze. He remembered the time he got detention with Rivaille in front of him, watching the boy's every movement while he answered each question on the paper sheet. He remembered the sandwiches wrapped the lecturer threw to him, told him to fill his empty stomach. Eren was sure that time the man had known about him from his childhood, he remembered the man mentioned his old name even if he despised it. It was a hint for Eren to remember about the lost memory. Eren brought his palm across his face, rubbing it softly as he tried to compose himself.

'_Why am I feeling like this? I felt like everything was breaking apart. I don't know what I'm supposed to do anymore…' _Eren hauled himself up from the seat, taking his bag in hand and walked towards the entrance of the classroom. He was surprised when the door suddenly swung open and his science teacher walked inside looking confusedly in his direction.

"Eren? Why are you still here?" Hanji asked, puzzled when she spotted him through the glass window of the hallway. Eren stiffened at the question.

"Nothing. I was about to go home actually." He muttered, feeling slightly bothered by the way she stared down on him.

"Okay, let's go outside together." She said and dragged the boy without waiting for an approval. Eren groaned inwardly, he wasn't having the need to chat with someone right now.

"Did Rivaille say anything to you? I heard you're getting detention today right after school." She started, looking back to the boy who was half running while trying to balance himself with her pace. She gave a smug grin when his face turned scarlet on its own will.

"Nothing much." He squeaked before biting his lips at how his voice was.

"I was actually wondering if you are having some kind of relation with Rivaille. The man was just too stubborn to open up with anyone, so it's no wonder if he acted so harshly towards you." Eren almost crashed into her when she abruptly stopped. He jolted in surprise when Hanji clasped both hands around Eren's, gripping them tightly.

"Eren, I believe the reason Rivaille tore apart was you, so I think you should fix this." Eren's eyes widened.

"Wait, how was it my fault?" He tried to retract his hands away but she gripped it even tighter. Hanji frowned when the boy felt accused.

"I'm not saying that it's a bad thing, it's a good thing actually. He never showed any kind of emotion before. And now that he started to care about something, he didn't know what to do. He… He lost someone dear to him before." The change of tone made Eren shut his mouth from letting another sound coming.

"The girl Petra had an illness, she's my distant relative. She's the one who used to think about Rivaille and cared for him when he's down. She listened to every story Rivaille told her including his weird dreams. His family disowned him because they were disappointed in him, he had no one to turn to other than Irvin and me. After Petra's death he was torn apart, he suddenly announced that he wanted to go to the military to atone his sin. He said something about regretting the fact that people died without him being able to do anything." Hanji paused, letting the boy taking in the information. Eren stayed silent, when he didn't move or even say anything to tell her to stop, she continued.

"I'm the one who suggest for him to go to university, but he insisted on going to the military right after he finished his high school. He went there for about two years, but that didn't make him any better. I don't know why he made himself suffer so badly in there, but seeing how he was wounded every time pained Irvin's and me. In the end he took my suggestion to go and pick some course from the university. He drowned himself in lots of books and took literature courses so he could write about what he had dreamt about. Hoping that he would forget all about the pain after he wrote what's inside his head into words." Hanji slowly let go of Eren's hand while giving him a sad smile.

"He wrote about you in that draft. It's supposed to be the first book he was writing for his final year." Eren's eyes widened at the information.

"Eren, I knew about the past that's haunting him, I've heard lots of stories about it. The fact that he had to meet you again that time in Germany must be fate. You two met again in Japan under different circumstance this time. You can understand about things a lot better now, I believe you can reach your hands and heal his wounds." Eren gave her a sad smile.

"Even if he just rejected me?" He regretted spilling that when Hanji's eyes suddenly lightened up.

"What? Did you confess? No wonder you seemed so down." Eren's face flushed.

"Err… not really… But-" He was cut off by Hanji's chuckled.

"Don't worry, he's just shy." Eren quickly looked away when he heard her. _No way, he looked like he was about to kill me. Wait, he had killed me before…_

"Anyway, I wish you know what you are supposed to do." Hanji patted him on the arm, earning a tired grunt coming from the boy.

"Come on, let's go home. I'll take you home." She dragged him again. Eren's mind drifted to the draft book Hanji was talking about.

'_He wrote a book for his final… All about the information of the past life. And about me…'_ Eren bit his lower lip. He wanted to read it, he wanted him to continue.

"I won't stop reaching out to him…" Hanji looked at him surprised before she gave a soft smile.

"Thank you."

* * *

Armin whipped his head when he heard what Eren just said. His face went pale while Eren just chewed on his fries nonchalantly as if the news was no big deal.

"Just don't inform Mikasa about him killing me in the past. Seriously, I don't know what she'll do." Eren mumbled after swallowing the fries. Armin slowly looked around the cafeteria, wondering if she was nearby. Much to his relief, she was nowhere near and they both could continue talking about the problem.

"So, if he had to kill you in the past, did you ask the reason why?" Eren gave a frustrated sigh and rubbed his forehead

"I didn't have the chance since he'd left me stunned by the fact. After that he said that he didn't deserve me because he was a bad person. He… I think he wanted me to think he's a bad person so that I won't be near him again or something. I don't know…"

"Eren, I think he was trying to make you safe. I mean, even if it's true that he had to kill you in the past, I'm sure there's some reason behind it. You should stay positive. Have you got some information from the medical book?" Eren snapped his head at the last question.

"How can I forget?" Armin rolled his eyes, typical Eren.

"Maybe you can get some information about you in the past life from that book. That can lead to some info about Rivaille there." Eren quickly dug his bag, searching for the book his father gave him. He quickly flipped page after page, reading together with Armin once he pulled it out. The blond scanned the record before his eyes to find something about giants called Titan.

"Titan." That word made both of them stay silent. They heard Grisha tell them about it yesterday, but they only got the name of the giants.

"What does a Titan look like?"

"Don't ask me, I don't remember my past life." Armin huffed as he scratched his head. Eren crossed his arms while thinking the words Rivaille said to him during the '_date_'.

"Giants that devour humans…" Armin raised his head from the book to gaze at his friend alerted when Eren mumbled in the middle of his thoughts.

"Rivaille told me about it when we went out together, you know, before I fainted. We're soldiers, bearing the logo of Freedom Wings that's attached on our back. We fought for humanity using 3D maneuver gear that could make us fly into the sky." Armin's eyes gleamed with marvel, unsure if he should be amused or feel weird. That kind of machine might not be useful in this modern day, but he wondered if he could see the look of it.

"What type of machine was that?" His tone full of wonder. Eren shook his head.

"Rivaille said he'd to sketch the gear for me to see, but I didn't get the chance to see it until now." Eren sighed. Armin closed his mouth shut.

"Keep looking." They turned their attention back to the book until the bell rang and both groaned at the interruption.

"Let's continue about this later. Or you should just ask him." Eren threw his best friend a look.

"You do know that he's avoiding me, right?" Armin rolled his eyes and flicked his forehead making Eren flinches at the painful contact.

"Try again to talk to him. Are you that scared of rejection?"

"Yes, when it comes from him." Eren mumbled, flushing when he just admitted himself. The blonde gave a teasing smile which Eren tried hard to ignore.

"Finally you know your own feelings." Eren hissed at him embarrassed before standing up and walk past him. Armin chuckled, following him back towards their classroom.

* * *

The time they had English class, Irvin was the one teaching. He explained that Rivaille had some reports to do for his internship and the class had once again been taught by Irvin. The students continued their lesson like nothing had mattered, but that's not the case with Eren. Deep inside his heart, he was dreading about the reality of Rivaille avoiding him deliberately. He didn't know what he was supposed to do to approach him again. Even that detention tactic was not going well. Eren sighed when Irvin called out for him to read in his text book while standing up. Armin murmured the page and he read it out loud in English. Irvin watched the boy closely, he knew even if Eren reading without mistakes, the student's mind was nowhere near them. Once the boy finished reading two paragraphs, he let him sit and move on to the next paragraph for another student to read. As Connie read the next paragraph, Irvin's mind drifted back to the conversation he was having last night.

"_You don't know what you are doing." Rivaille ignored the guy's words whilst typing the report on his notebook. Irvin tried to talk to him right after he went home from the school pretty late the night before. He was informed that Eren got detention right after class finished._

"_Rivaille, you can't avoid him forever." Irvin sighed when Rivaille stopped typing only to glare at him._

"_I fucking killed him in the past, Irvin. That's my sin and he doesn't need to know the details." Irvin stayed silent at the words._

"_Rivaille…" He tried again but Rivaille pursed his lips annoyed._

"_He ____doesn't_ need to know the whole details." he repeated, pressing the end of the conversation. Rivaille's eyes flew back to the screen, and hurriedly typed the last line of the paragraph he was writing. 

"_I just want you to think about his feeling for once, you're the one who started it. You shouldn't have gone together with him that day if you're planning to ignore him now." Rivaille's eyes met his. Irvin was hoping that he had pushed something deep within that barrier of his. Much to his disappointment, Rivaille shrugged it off._

"_This report needs to be done. You are the one telling me to finish my last semester." He scoffed and clicked the print button. He stood up from his seat and left the room to make another cup of coffee, leaving Irvin alone. The taller guy gave a tired sigh and shook his head._

"Sir?" a voice interrupted his thoughts, he realized that Connie had finished reading.

"Oh, sorry. You can sit down." Irvin gave an apologetic look. Rivaille needed to do something with this mess.

* * *

'_Where am I?' Eren tried to blink inside the darkness which engulfed him. The area surrounding him was very hot, like it was on fire. Eren's eyes found his vision slowly clear and found himself being so high up in the air full of steam smoke. Eren slowly shifted in his place when he noticed he was stuck in some kind of flesh, he felt himself being pulled down by someone he couldn't see so well. His green eyes looked in front of him, the blood dripping down from the man's body while he carried him in his arms. The man quickly brought his legs to run right after he landed on the ground with him safely secured in his arms. Eren tried to call out, telling him about his wound, telling him that there's no need to worry about his well being. But the man won't listen and continued to run as if their lives depended on it. Eren's eyes widened when he saw a few blades being thrown towards their direction. He could barely move to save himself along with the man who carried him, he noticed they were being pursued. Eren shut his eyes, readying himself for what was coming when the man starting to fall to the ground._

"Eren!" Eren snapped his eyes open, giving out a surprised shaky breath while he was being awakened by another slap across his face.

"Mikasa…?" He muttered when he saw his sister's looming over him. Blinking a few times at her in confusion, Mikasa slowly drew back, a frown still formed on her brows.

"You were moaning and screaming in your nightmare. Are you alright, now?" When the brunet sat up, he realized he was drenched in sweat.

"I… I'm alright, I guess… I felt tired like I've run a lot." Eren said, feeling relieved that he was awake.

"Is that your past life?" Mikasa took a seat on the edge of the bed, putting her palm on top of Eren's quivering hand. She looked at him sadly when the boy nodded.

"That's what I'm worrying about, Eren. Was it that terrifying?" Eren sighed and leaned against the window sill.

"It's okay. I'm alright, just surprised by the sudden blow. Though, next time, don't wake me up by slapping me anymore. It felt like I'm really being in pain if you did that." Eren warned her. Mikasa nodded, taking in the warning.

"I won't." she murmured, before patting his hand gently. She stood up from the bed when Eren had calmed down and left him to get another sleep. Even if Eren didn't know if he dared to sleep again, that nightmare was not as scary as the night before. His eyes glided to the clock on his nightstand. It was 2 o'clock in the morning. Shifting his green eyes to his mobile phone, Eren grasped it and turned it on. He scrolled on the list of the names on his contact list until he reached Rivaille's number. He started typing the message to him, pausing for a moment while searching the right words.

_I know it's been a few days and… you're avoiding me, but… I had to tell you something. I got a nightmare just now. Being pursued with blades thrown towards my direction. Does that have a connection to the past life? Last time I was chained to the pole and kneeled on the ground with a bloody man before my eyes.I just don't know who to ask other than you…_

Eren stared at the words he just typed, his finger hovering over the send button hesitantly. He didn't know if he should send the message to Rivaille now that seeing him was getting harder than before. He decided to just punch the send button on the touch screen with his thumb. He rolled on his side and clenched his eyes shut, not wanting to know if Rivaille would feel bothered by him sending message to his mobile phone in this late at night. The man was probably asleep, sleeping soundly. He was surprised when his phone vibrated with a short jingle, noticing him that he got a message to read.

_Meet me tomorrow after class._

His eyes looked at his mobile screen in disbelief when he read the text message, the reply was very unexpected. The man didn't tell him where, he knew Rivaille got a day off nowadays in a random day just so he could work on his internship paperwork. Was it Rivaille who just replied him? Maybe if he told him about his dream, Rivaille would understand. Eren's lips curved into a smile. Having a nightmare wasn't so bad after all.

_Okay. Tell me where we'll meet._

* * *

Rivaille was in the middle of his paperwork when frustration started to get into him. He threw his pen down and ran his hands into his hair, sighing heavily.

"_I just want you to think about his feeling for once, you're the one who started it. You shouldn't have gone together with him that day if you're planning to ignore him now."_

Irvin's words had stung a bit. He didn't realize that not only Eren who was reaching his hands to him again, but he was also chasing after the boy. Rivaille closed his eyes, wondering what he should do now that he had rejected the boy pretty badly. He jolted in surprised when a loud ping sound came from his mobile phone. Wondering who was texting him in two o'clock in the morning, he gave a scowl. His eyes widened when he read the text messages, disbelieving look on his face as he almost dropped his phone. He didn't know how to react for a moment. Rivaille re-read the message as if afraid that his eyes playing tricks on him, afraid that he'd become too tired to even dream while sitting up. But no, it's real. The text message was real, Eren's dream was real.

Rivaille bit his lower lip and sent the message back. He needed to confirm on their next meeting. He needed to know the dream Eren was having. Deep inside, his chest clenched painfully, Eren's nightmare came back. It was all his fault. His head hung low as his bangs covering his eyes after he sent the text message back to Eren.

* * *

Eren's hands were shaking when he stood before a classroom nervously. Rivaille had told him to meet in an empty classroom near the janitor room right after the school finished. He had told Armin and Mikasa to just go ahead and leave him at school while he'd dealt with his own problem. Their concerns were kind of annoying sometimes, but Eren could see the hint of Armin's teasing gaze on him when they parted after the last lesson.

Eren slid the door open to see Rivaille sitting on the teacher's desk, reading a book. Had he been waiting? Eren softly closed the door, staring at him when the man raised his head to see who was coming. Rivaille closed his book and stood up, their eyes never leaving each other until he was directly standing before Eren.

"Rivaille…" He started but Rivaille cut him off.

"Your dream… was it real or was it written somewhere in the book your dad gave you?"

"It's real, why would I lie to you…" he scowled while looking away. There's a moment of pause before Rivaille continued.

"It's me… The bloody man who stood before you when you were chained was me." Eren gave him a perplexed look.

"Were you the one who brought me in your arms while running away from the pursuer who… threw blades to us? I… I was coming out from in the middle of a heavy steam, I can't exactly recall it but… " Rivaille stiffened at the further explanation of his dream and gave another nod.

"I don't understand. Was someone trying to kill you?"

"It's actually you they were chasing. I was trying to save you, Eren. You couldn't run during that time because you're wounded pretty badly."

"Tell me, does it have something to do with the giants that devour humans?" Rivaille sucked his breath, his fists trembled.

"Yes… yes…" Eren stayed silent and swallowed nervously.

"Then why did you say that you… you killed me?" Rivaille slumped against the desk, hissing when the memory flooded into his mind. Watching the man in worry, Eren hurried after him but Rivaille raised his hand in the air, stopping the boy to approach him.

"I'm sorry, I asked too much…" Eren startled when he was suddenly pulled into a tight embrace. His eyes widened when the man shuddered while trying to hold in his tears.

"I'm sorry you had to remember that. I'm sorry." Rivaille's voice was desperate. Eren looked at him from the corner of his eyes, not knowing what to say. He slowly tangled his hands on the man's shirt, trying to comfort him a bit.

"This is the reason I don't want you to come near me. You have started dreaming about the past now, I'm sorry. I didn't mean to hurt you, Eren. You could have avoided me, you could have taken your peaceful life ahead of you and leave me behind. You should have done that, but why don't you?! I gave you the chance, you stupid brat!" Rivaille was now caressing Eren's back as he continued holding him in his arms. The boy's hands were now clutching at Rivaille's shirt tightly, biting his lips when the need to cry was overflowing.

"I won't go away just because of that, you sounded so painful by the time you said your last sentences that night in the other classroom, as if you wanted me to think of you bad enough and stay away. But then I realized one thing. I should have known by the time I met you again, by the time we went out together… by the time I remembered my childhood, I have seen you in a different way." Rivaille abruptly pushed him off from his arms, eyeing the boy in disbelieve.

"The time you said we were lovers, I had this warm feeling inside of me. I had a mix feeling, afraid that I'm wrong, afraid that my feeling was a mistake because you twisted it in a different direction. You said you killed me, but even if it was meant to hurt me, I was still torn apart when you left me in the dark." Rivaille looked like he was about to cry.

"I'm sorry… I just don't want to tie you with me again, if you can find a better person than I am in this new world, I don't mind. We might have been lovers in the past, but this life could lead to a different way. I don't want to close your path and drown you along with me, Eren." Eren shook his head, he hugged the man fully, feeling desperate to make him understand.

"Please don't say that. We may be different now, but I don't want you to take the wrong assumption on me loving you because of the past. Not because you said we were lovers. My feelings are genuine! It has nothing to do with the past." Eren felt happy when Rivaille returned the hug.

"Tell me what happened this time." Eren said with a crack whispered, smiling when the man nestled his hand on his brunet locks. When he felt Rivaille shift a bit, Eren made some distance to break the hug. He was surprised when he felt a pair of lips pressing gently on the crook of his neck instead. Eren felt the air lifted into several degrees hotter than before.

"Rivaille…" he slowly pushed the man away, feeling embarrassed. Even if he didn't mark him, he wasn't expecting that kind of demeanour. Eren flushed even more when Rivaille rested his head against his shoulder.

"I will explain to you everything now." Eren didn't know what to do while the man continued hugging him, refusing to let him go. He didn't trust himself to speak and only gave a nod mutely. He clutched his eyes shut and return the hug to Rivaille who was startled at the sudden act. Rivaille gave a soft chuckle and pulled him closer if possible.

'_Still a brat as always' _Rivaille kissed his earshell which turned red by the affection. It felt right, having the boy in his arms again, having to caress his back like he usually did, having felt the warmth against his body while hugging each other closely. Rivaille's eyes glimmered with sadness.

"I'm sorry I've hurt you." He whispered, still not letting him go like he was afraid that Eren would vanish. Eren shook his head, smiling when he felt comfortable by the caresses.

"Nothing to worry about, I'm fine." Rivaille pulled back to stare into his eyes. Those emerald orbs were always shining brightly, his gaze stared deep into his eyes. Beautiful as always. He brought his lips to kiss on the brunet's eyelid, earning a soft chuckle from Eren.

"Rivaille, will you do the usual thing? You only did that in my dream, I want to feel it now. Those kisses…" Rivaille's lips curved into a smile at the favour the boy asked while blushing.

"The usual? Do you remember what it was called?" He whispered, there's no need to talk loudly when they were this close. Eren tilted his head in question while Rivaille brushed his fingers against his cheek lovingly.

"Uh, ritual?" he tried but Rivaille shook his head.

"We called it **four promises**." Eren gave a smile, he wished he remembered. His sadness was probably displayed transparently on his face since Rivaille shook his head and pressed their forehead together.

"Don't feel sad, it's actually pretty cheesy now that I think about it." Eren snorted at him.

"Explain to me." He whispered, leaning down when Rivaille circled his hand on the back of his neck. Pressing a soft kiss on Eren's forehead, he brought Eren's hand into his, intertwining their fingers together.

"I'll give you my heart…" and moved down to his nose.

"… my soul" and to his right cheek.

"…my everything" Rivaille's eyes were now gleaming with happiness when Eren's face turned into a deep scarlet by the kisses. He knew what was coming next.

"… and so we'll never be apart." He moved closer to press his lips against him, kissing him lovingly. Eren closed his eyes and deepened the kiss, feeling happy that they were finally able to be together. As soon as their lips met, he felt a pang of déjà vu melting into his heart. He knew the feelings, he had kissed the man before.

His long lost lover.

Eren let a single tear fall to his cheek.

Maybe because of the last promise that they met each other again. Maybe it was their fate to be together again. Either way, he was glad that they won't be apart again.

Together they continued kissing each other with the sunset displayed behind them, showering them with warm comforting light.

_**TBC**_

OMG FINALLY! I hope you like the end of this chp, tell me what you think :DD

Next chp will… omg X"D these plot bunnies are killing me, they won't stop running around in my head. Even I'm confused on where to start for the next chp because I'll start with the past event… ._. Pls give me strengths…

–flails-


	12. A Date and Kisses

**Overwhelming Emotions**

**Genre: **Drama Romance | AU | Reincarnation

**Rating:** M

**Pairing: (mainly)** Rivaille x Eren

**_Summary: _**Being woven in his dreams and memories, Rivaille was at a loss. The second encounter with a certain boy made it even much worse than he thought it would be, especially when the boy is reaching his hands out to him again.

**Disclaimer: **

I don't own Shingeki no Kyojin, but this fanfiction is mine.

©AsakuraHannah

**A/N:**I need to change the rating to M because there's some adult content. Let's take a break from the sappy drama and enjoy the fluff.

**_Chapter 12 : _****A date and Kisses**

Eren looked outside the window as he opened it wide enough to let the night cold breeze inside, the weather was starting to get warmer nowadays as the season slowly changed. He breathed in the cold night air while putting his hand on the rim of the window. He sensed Rivaille hug him from behind, not letting him turn around. It felt odd about their height difference with the man hugging him like that, but when Rivaille rested his chin on his left shoulder, Eren relaxed and leaned back to him.

"You should go home, you know. It's almost dinner time" Rivaille said, getting a smile from the brunet as he shook his head.

"It's alright. Mikasa was less noisy when it came to me getting home late. She usually cooked something easy for me to warm it up in the microwave later when I'm home." Rivaille breathed out a laugh before kissing Eren on his neck again. Eren fidgeted when he felt the contact, blushing when he noticed Rivaille was actually pressing his mouth quite hard. He smirked against his neck when he noticed Eren's eyes gazing at him.

"Don't get me in trouble by leaving an obvious mark there." Eren murmured, putting his palms against Rivaille's hands that circled around his stomach. Eren jumped when Rivaille licked him instead.

"Rivaille…" He hummed, trying to get away from the teasing gesture.

"Tell me, why are you so tall in both lives?" that question made Eren choke a laughter.

"How would I know? I think you should drink milk a lot?" He yelped when Rivaille pinched the back of his hand angrily. "I'm joking!" he hissed while rubbing his hand that was aching.

"Shut up." The man huffed when Eren pouted. Both of them went into a comfortable silence until Eren's curiosity broke it.

"Rivaille… tell me about Titan." He turned around when Rivaille let him go. Rivaille walked towards the teacher's desk. The man pulled the drawer open and picked some paper and pen out. Eren curiously watched him as the raven drew a sketch of the thing he asked pretty messily. His eyes made out a human mixed monster's face on the half done sketch.

"It was a giant, they have various different heights, the tallest could reach more than 50 meters. Some of them were deviant type with unusual behavior." Eren gaped when he heard about their height. The human size that Rivaille drew were lined up with the tallest giant, made the human seem overly small.

"That time, they ate us just for their own fun. The humankind built a very tall wall around their city, divided by three kinds of walls, the outer wall named Maria, then Rose, and the inner wall where the King and higher ranked nobles lived, Wall Sina. By the time we built these walls, humanity had become nearly extinct." Rivaille paused after he finished the three circles on the paper, letting the information sink into Eren's mind.

"So… basically they were just… outside the outer wall?" There's a pause before Rivaille continued.

"100 years after that, the outer wall, Maria, was broken by a Colossal Titan which height was about 50 meters." Eren went pale and Rivaille put the pen down. He cupped both Eren's cheeks in his palms, staring at him tenderly.

"Apparently, your house was destroyed by the debris and your mother got devoured that time while your father went to work. He was considered missing after the ruckus. That's when you started going to the military, being a trainee for five years until you joined the Scouting Legion. You promised yourself to kill all the Titans and so you could go outside the world and to the sea with your friend, Armin whom you did promise with. But you have to know one thing, Eren. You are also a Titan." Rivaille's expression didn't change when Eren flinched from him in fear.

"I… what?"

"You could turn into a Titan because of your father's injection before he went missing, it seemed he was a doctor who knew various medical substances. Dangerous one that is…"

"Did I also eat humans?" There was a disgusted tone when he asked. Eren felt a wash of relief when Rivaille shook his head.

"You are not _exactly_ one of them since all you needed to do was control your power while you shifted. That's not the case with other people, Eren. People feared you. Even if you entered the Scouting Legion and gave yourself to help humankind, people feared your ability to shift into a Titan form. They're still afraid if someday you'd lost yourself and going berserk and devoured them, since you lived inside the wall. So, I took custody of you, being by your side with you as my underling. I'm a Lance Corporal Rivaille that time. That's where we met, in the dungeon right after you were captured." His lips curved into a thin smile when Eren's eyes softened.

"Corporal…" Hearing that, Rivaille pulled him down and gave him a tender kiss on the lips, earning a soft grunt from the boy when he was being pulled rather harshly. Eren let out a small whimper sound when he felt the shorter of the two lick his lips, seeking entrance. He complied, opening his mouth just a little to let Rivaille in. The time their tongues met each other, Eren gave a shuddered breath at the sensation. He put his palm on top of Rivaille's hands that stayed on his cheeks. Together their tongues danced after Eren shied away a few times Rivaille went deeper inside. Feeling the need to breath, Rivaille pulled away, leaving trails of saliva between their parted lips.

"Let's continue tomorrow, I'll give you all the information you need to know. I won't run away, but I might hesitate because it was painful." Rivaille whispered with a husky tone. Seeing Eren's red face and foggy expression made Rivaille nuzzle his hair affectionately.

"Stop looking like that just because of a simple kiss. I won't be able to hold back anymore." He pecked his cheek before turning away from him, leaving Eren blushing brightly.

"Let's go home, I'll ride you to your house." The invitation was taken pretty quickly.

* * *

Eren got out of the car when Rivaille pulled right on the front of his house. He looked down to Rivaille once Rivaille opened the window.

"Tomorrow is the weekend, so I'll let you know where we'll meet up." Eren's face lightened up when he heard him. This time it's going to be a real date. Rivaille noticed this and mentioned Eren to bend down so he could kiss him before he turned home.

Eren gave a small wave with a smile, cheeks heating up with the lingered feelings of Rivaille's lips against his. He turned around to walk inside only to give a terrifying shout when he spotted his sister with a killer look on her face.

"I thought it was Dad's car but it sounded different, so I came out to check. I saw that. You two…" she paused before she continued, not wanting to make Eren feel offended in any way. She didn't mind him dating another guy, but why him?! Of all people… Eren bit his lip while shying away from her.

"Just pretend that you didn't see it, then." He muttered, quickly getting inside the house. Mikasa sighed loudly and followed him inside.

"Just don't kiss before me anymore." She grunted, ignoring Eren's choked sound of surprised. The image of her brother being _ravished_ was kind of disturbing.

"How would I know you'd be there, right behind me?" A moment of pause from the two made Eren wince uncomfortably.

"So, I guess things have settled down, now?" Mikasa asked.

"Somehow, I think? It went pretty well…" Eren muttered, his eyes were still trying to avoid Mikasa's searching look.

"As long as you are happy…" Mikasa gave him a light pat on his shoulder, not saying another word until she was in front of her room.

"By the way, your food is in the microwave." She told him before disappearing into her room.

* * *

_Eren stared up at the man on top of him. His superior gazing down as he admired the boy before his eyes. Eren blushed when he saw the man smirk while leaning down to him, kissing his shoulder and leaving marks while he writhed beneath him. The brunet gasped when he felt the man's fingers trail down his exposed body, letting out a soft grunt of embarrassment when it touched several sensitive places. When he was about to let out a guttural sound, his lips were claimed qui__te __roughly, leaving him breathless as the tongue invaded deep inside his mouth. The green eyed boy's hand unconsciously squeezed on the man's arm which was resting on his side, securing him closely. Eren let out a mewled sound against the kiss when he felt the roaming fingers playfully poke his hard-on. He pulled away from the mouth to give a soft moan, adjusting himself up to get some frictions. He heard himself begging the man's title, wanting to feel more pleasure from those teasing touches._

"_Corporal…" His vision went blurred when the man steadily took his cock in his hand, pumping him slowly._

"_AH…" he rasped out when he finally got what he wanted._

"_Nngh more.. please…"_

"_Eren… take it slow… this might be the last…" The corporal whispered gently, kissing the underside of his ear when Eren's head moved to the side. He was unable to control the saliva dripping out his mouth when Rivaille licked his sensitive skin._

"_No… please… don't remind me…" He gave a sob when the hand stopped working. He stared right into those raven orbs which were gleaming with sadness, bringing his hands around his neck._

"_Eren…" The boy closed his eyes when his superior claimed his lips once again, enjoying himself once their lips were back connecting with each other._

Eren opened his eyes abruptly, blinking in confusion. He gave a gasp when he felt the wetness in the middle of his legs. He quickly lifted his blanket, staring at the undeniably tent in his pajama pants. He groaned when his lower body gave a thrumming pleasure, ordering him to relieve himself. Eren cupped his face with his hands, trying to breathe steadily. He couldn't believe he was dreaming of the man he just got together yesterday. Eren threw the blanket up above his head and laid on his side, biting his lower lip to prevent any sound coming. His trembling hand went inside his underwear, taking a firm hold of his hard member, stroking himself vigorously. He was so close, he could feel it. His other hand pulled down on the waistband of his pants and underwear in place while stroking himself faster. He let out a soft panting sound while muttering his tutor's name at the time he felt himself coming closer to his peak. He licked his lips, opening and closing his mouth as if he was kissing the man open-mouthed. His toes curled as he jolted on the pleasurable sensation, moaning in ecstasy when he came rather quickly.

Blinking after he came down from high, Eren gave a grunt of shame. He hoped that Mikasa wouldn't be able to hear how loud he moaned. Pulling away his wet hand off his softened length, Eren winced. He sat up after he pulled his pants and underwear back up and wobbly went off the bed to his bathroom. He slammed the door shut, not wanting to think about the dream anymore or it would be worse. He needed to get out of his house today.

* * *

Eren was opening the fridge when Mikasa came to him slightly dressed in neat clothing. He looked at her in wonder.

"Are you going somewhere?" She suddenly asked when she saw him looking tidier than his usual holiday clothes. Blinking at the question, Eren gave a nod at her. His eyes were telling her that she was also in the same place.

"Well, I'm going out with Rivaille today… Is there something wrong?" Mikasa shook her head.

"Nothing, I was actually wondering if you'd like to have breakfast before you go. I just threw the empty cereal box into the trash can earlier." Eren shrugged and closed the refrigerator's door shut.

"I can burn some toasts for a quick meal, don't worry about it. Are you having a part-time job?" Mikasa shook her head.

"No, actually I'm about to do grocery for our food stock. Dad will go with me to the market. It's such a good opportunity to spend the weekend together with him while he's here." Eren looked at her surprised, a guilty expression formed on his face.

"Well… I've got a date…" he mumbled the last word carefully. Mikasa rolled her eyes, she was about to speak up when their father walked in.

"It's okay, just go. I'll be around much more this month, the hospital in this town needed my help with a certain patient…" Grisha ruffled Eren's hair who grunted in response.

"Well, we'll be going now. Take care." Grisha waved at his son who wore a smile, feeling encouraged. Following both of them outside, Eren grinned when Mikasa threw him a look. He knew it was a rare opportunity to be able to spend a day with his family once in a while. But it was too sudden and he had made promises with his boyfriend.

"Be careful." Eren shouted when the two of them got in the car. He quickly ran back into the kitchen to prepare breakfast on his own. After checking up the clock, he relaxed when he noticed he still had some time before Rivaille came.

By the time Rivaille was on the front of his house, pressing his door bell, Eren hurriedly ran to open the door, greeting the older of the two with a warm smile. As soon as their eyes met, his tutor pulled him down to give him a tender kiss on the lips. Eren gave a shy smile when Rivaille pulled away to look him in the eyes. The raven circled his arms around the boy when those emerald eyes shone brightly. Eren's cheeks turned scarlet when his tutor told him to lean down so he could do their ritual. The student closed his eyes when Rivaille kissed his forehead, nose, cheek, and lips tenderly.

"Shall we go now?" he whispered softly, blowing his warm breath against Eren's wet lips as he spoke.

"Wait…" Eren licked his lip nervously before turning back inside to look at his mom's photo.

"I'm going." He muttered at her photo which smiled back at him without words. Rivaille was standing before him when he realized what Eren did. He slowly traced the photo frame with his fingers. Watching the man silently, Eren recalled that Rivaille had met his mother during their childhood.

"Rivaille…" he whispered his name when Rivaille took his hand with him.

"I will take good care of him." He whispered to the photo, making Eren flush in embarrassment. It was like a promise of a lifetime. Meeting their eyes for a moment, he gave a thin smile at the boy before him.

"Let's go. Stupid Irvin won't let me borrow the car because he needed to use it." Eren laughed when he heard him.

They walked out the gate hand in hand, sharing each others' warmth.

"Eren, you idiot. You didn't wear gloves again."

"Don't worry, the weather is not that cold anymore. Besides, I've got your hand to warm me up." The boy gave a grin when Rivaille raised an eyebrow.

"That's cheesy." Rivaille squeezed his hand hard enough for Eren to yelp in pain.

* * *

Rivaille led him to the bookstore on their way to the park. Eren followed him closely when the raven walked towards the novel section. He watched curiously when the man picked up one book.

"You like to read a lot don't you?" Eren smiled when Rivaille's eyes scanned pages after pages.

"Yeah, I like to drown in stories. A habit to put my mind off from nightmares." Eren looked at him in the eyes.

"You wrote a book for your final, didn't you? Hanji told me about it." Rivaille closed the novel and gave a soft sigh.

"Yes, I tried to pour everything I remembered in words. She's the one who suggested to me to take literature since I have an amazing nightmare to turn it into a novel. I'm not sure I'm making a good progress with the draft I'm working on though." Pressing the nightmare word sarcastically, Rivaille put the book back into the shelf neatly.

"I would like to read it when it's finished. Who knows, I might remember my past life once I read it." Eren gave a smile to the surprised expression on Rivaille's face.

"I will try my best to make it good. Maybe the rating will go up too, considering we were lovers that time." Rivaille gave a teasing smirk when Eren's cheeks once again painted with pinkish hues. The boy had obviously forgotten that he was included in the story. The man then picked up some random big children's book from the top shelf after scanning the opposite rack and pulled Eren down by his collar, earning a surprised yelp from the brunet. His green eyes widened when Rivaille covered their heads with the large opened book, feeling the small lick coming from the older man. Eren gasped when their lips smashed sloppily, blushing at the current not-so-secretive act they were doing in the middle of the bookstore. Fearing that someone might see, Eren grunted while trying to break free. The hand tightened on his collar while Rivaille shoved his tongue deep inside his mouth, forcing Eren to stay still in his hold. Rivaille pulled away right when Eren was starting to lose himself into the kiss, blinking in annoyance at the lack of warmth against his lips. Watching the raven send him a smug look that made Eren wince. He quickly stepped back a little after Rivaille let go of his collar.

"Rivaille, you… crazy…" Eren accused while he licked his wet lips as he tried to act as normal as possible. Rivaille stared down at his tongue while the boy continued to give him a disbelieving look.

"Don't complain when you are clearly enjoying it." He chuckled and put the book back to its place. The man obviously would never let those pink dusts leave Eren's cheeks.

* * *

Eren hissed when Rivaille slapped his hand for the second time when he attempted to steal another fry from his lecturer's tray. The brunet moped at him until Rivaille threw him a smug look.

"What's with that look?" Eren muttered. The raven put one fry in his mouth and pointed for Eren to come closer and eat the fries from his lips. Eren's face flushed, he looked down to his own tray where his burger was still half eaten.

"I'm not going to do that here, besides, it's not a pocky!" Eren huffed and snatched up his burger. Rivaille snorted at him and chewing his fry.

"So if it was a pocky then you'd oblige?" He leaned closer once he swallowed the fry.

"I didn't say that…" He hissed, full of shyness on his tone. Setting his burger back down after taking a big bite and chew. He jumped in shock when he felt Rivaille's tongue lick across the corner of his lips. Eyes widening, he couldn't believe how daring the man could be.

"You got some sauce near your lips. Actually, we're sitting at the very corner right now, seriously, nobody will see. Even if they see us, I wouldn't care anyway. If you don't want to, then I won't tell you anything about the past life." Rivaille took another fry and stuck it in his mouth after giving him a smug look. Eren stared at him doubtfully, he sucked in his breath when Rivaille leaned closer until his face was almost an inch before him, playfully poking the tip of the fry to his lips. Eren's eyes looked right and left before he quickly leaned forward to take a small bite off the fry with eyes clenched shut. His eyes flew open when Rivaille leaned in quite fast towards him and claimed his lips into him. Eren gave a soft grunt when Rivaille playfully licked his mouth, he could taste the salty flavor from the fries. Gulping half of the fry down, Eren moaned a little when Rivaille bit his tongue softly, tugging at it with his teeth. Eren stared right into his raven eyes which a gleam and revelry before he drew back from his lips.

"You are…" He couldn't continue his words as he had no idea what he was supposed to say. The feeling of being claimed for the third time that day made Eren feel so hot inside. He wished the man stopped teasing him. His cheeks getting warmer when Rivaille gave a small peck on his lips for the last time with a satisfied look in his eyes.

"You know, you were always so straight forward in your other life."

"How was I supposed to remember that?" Rivaille's lips smirked when the boy huffed in annoyance.

"I don't mind the current Eren right before me, now, though." Eren fidgeted a little, playing with the straw on his glass half-empty soft drink.

"Finish your lunch and we'll get going." Blinking at some kind of plan Rivaille was dragging him, uncertainty flashed in his eyes.

"Where to? Aren't you supposed to explain lots of things to me right now?" Rivaille rolled his eyes.

"I won't go anywhere. I'll tell you what you need to know. By the way, you got some sauce on the corner of your left cheek." Eren took the tissue to wipe it off but Rivaille held his hand, drew it to his lips and kissing his fingers lightly.

"You liar." He said after Rivaille gave him an elated stare. He had never seen the raven seem so happy as right now. Eren returned the stare with a smile.

The next thing Eren found out was that Rivaille had dragged him into a cinema. He had picked some kind of action movie for both of them to enjoy their time. They were fighting over a popcorn in the dark with hands slapping each other when one attempted to go inside the box. By the time they went out, Eren had laughed about how silly they were for fighting over popcorn.

Rivaille gave a smile and dragged Eren outside when the boy ogling on some pastries on their way out. The boy was annoyed when Rivaille walked outside the building without any mercy. They were outside when Eren noticed the day had passed pretty quickly. It was getting darker when they started pacing towards the nearby train station. Hoping that Rivaille won't be planning on going back home, he voiced out his concern. He had yet gotten any more information from the man about their story.

"Rivaille…"

"Where do you want to go next? It's almost 5 o'clock." He cut him off, much to his dismay.

"I wanted to hear about the past life." Rivaille stopped walking, eyeing the boy who suddenly turned serious.

"I'll tell you about it later." Frowning at the unsatisfying answer, Eren frowned.

"Are you avoiding it?"

"Eren… listen… I… I don't know where I'm supposed to start about this. Just give me some time."

"Let's start from yesterday night you told me, when we met in a dungeon." He pressed, stepping forward. Rivaille sucked in his breath, he closed his eyes and rubbed his hand across his face. Eren could see the hint of nervousness from the man before him. The tutor took a deep breath before exhaling softly.

"I don't get why are you so adamant about wanting to hear how you die." Rivaille scoffed, turning around from Eren's angry eyes.

"Rivaille, I thought we are supposed to be more open about this." By the time Rivaille turned around, Eren knew he was avoiding the topic. It's not like he didn't enjoy being with him for the day, but he wanted to hear it, wanted to know the whole truth about the situation. He needed to know about the burden Rivaille had been carrying on his shoulders, he wished that the man would let them out, sharing his pain with him.

"Did you not trust me at all?" Eren's hurt tone was enough to make him turn around. Their eyes clashing against each other until Eren gave a tired sigh.

"Fine. Let's just go home…" Eren said, looking down to the pavement as he walked past his boyfriend. His pace stopped when Rivaille abruptly circled his arm around his stomach, making them having another eye-contact. Still angry with Rivaille being so secretive, Eren averted his eyes away.

"We need a place to talk." Eren gave a grin when he heard him.

"Then, let's go back to that pastry shop. You can have your coffee while I get my pastry." Rivaille shoot him a look when he heard him.

"You're paying, you little…" he stopped his insult when Eren's hand dragged him back inside the building.

"Don't worry, I've got some income with me!" Rivaille grunted at him and let the boy do whatever he wanted for the time being. He wondered if the income he was talking about was enough to cover for both of them. Walking faster to match his pace, Rivaille clasped their hands together.

**_TBC_**

Anyway ty for the reviews! n.n –hugs all–


	13. Their Story

**Overwhelming Emotions**

**Genre: **Drama Romance | AU | Reincarnation

**Rating:** M

**Pairing: (mainly)** Rivaille x Eren

**_Summary: _**Being woven in his dreams and memories, Rivaille was at a loss. The second encounter with a certain boy made it even much worse than he thought it would be, especially when the boy is reaching his hands out to him again.

**Disclaimer: **

I don't own Shingeki no Kyojin, but this fanfiction is mine.

©AsakuraHannah Ffn

**A/N:** Beware of some adult content, in this chapter. _Italics_ are the past life scenes.

**_Chapter 13 : Their Story_**

Rivaille eyed the receipt when Eren searched for his wallet. His eyebrow twitched at the amount. They had ordered the pastries on the cashier and Rivaille got the coffee Eren promised him. He was surprised when Eren put the bills on the small awaiting tray, nodding when the lady took his payment for further confirmation of their orders.

"Okay, we'll send your orders to your table in a few minutes. Thank you." She said and started to get on for her work.

"Let's take a seat in the corner." Eren happily said after he took their table's number from the lady.

"I'm surprised you indeed got some income." Rivaille muttered, following his lead to their table. Eren threw him a smug look and took a seat across him.

"I got an errand in the library, plus my Dad is home. He'll be staying for a month around here and he gave the monthly income to my wallet. That's why."

"Your dad is home? I want to meet him if I can. It's been so long since I met him."

"Oh sure, why not. We can go to my house after this. He's out shopping with Mikasa today. I couldn't go with him since I've promised to go with you. They told me they won't be long, maybe they are heading home right now."

Rivaille hummed, nodding at him. He remembered the time when he met Grisha. After being tossed out from the house, he was confused with everything surrounding him, he was then brought into a different country with only Irvin by his side and his limited German language. Wandering around the country, Rivaille had gotten into the corner side of the city, sitting by the lake on his own. When he was lost in his thought, thinking if the lake could make him sleep for eternity, a gentle voice interrupted him.

Grisha was there, asking if he was alright since his face looked pale. Soon he found out he was a doctor who was having a visit to his relative in Germany. He was married to an Asian lady and got one son and an adoptive daughter. He invited him into their house, telling him that Irvin could pick him up in their place when he finished his work.

That was the time he realized the meaning of his nightmare. The time when he met the green eyed boy who always came into his dreams. Being called out by his title from the boy named Eren, Rivaille abruptly stood up, earning a confused look from Doctor Jaeger and his wife, Carla. He almost knocked the herbal tea Carla made to calm his mind when Rivaille quickly paced towards Eren's direction. Both adults were watching them with a mix of wonder and confusion when Eren started clenching his shirt with gleaming eyes. He kept calling out his name as _Rivaille Heichou._ Rivaille rushed to pull the boy into his arms, holding him close as Eren let out a choked sob. He made a quivering voice, chanting the boy's name like a mantra as they continued hugging each other tightly.

Eren eyed him sadly, smiling when he listened to Rivaille talk about the time they met.

"I thought I was dreaming, but it was real, I got you in my arms. I didn't let go until you pulled away. Your parents were surprised but they didn't sound disgusted or even tried to send me away. I told them about my nightmares and how they were related to you. Doctor Jaeger explained that it was probably a memory from my past life. They were there for some reason. I was having a hard time believing when I heard his explanation. He sounded so convincing that it scared me, but since you also remembered some of your past life, my doubt was confirmed." Their order came a few minutes ago but it was left untouched. Rivaille's story made Eren forget about his craving for pastry. The man had put his hand on top of Eren's, caressing it with his thumb.

"I was surprised when I saw you in the classroom, you were in Japan now." Eren nodded and started picking up his fork with his other hand.

"Yes, my mom wanted to rest in her country, that was her last wish. Beside we've been back and forth to my dad's hometown so much. After her funeral we haven't got a chance to go back. Dad's money drained because of the funeral, and trying to keep us educated while working back and forth outside cities. We also got expenses for the bills and food. We're starting to get back to our feet now."

"That doesn't mean you can spend your time eating some fancy food like, right now. The pastries in this shop are not for high-school income." Rivaille teased, making the boy cringe. He was taken back to what Eren said next while pouting.

"I just wanted to treat you like a boyfriend does. It's a payback for what you did to me last time." He mumbled, too embarrassed to even let the man know. He eyed Rivaille when his tutor let out a small grunt, as if he sounded discomforted, which was actually the other way around.

"Don't say things like that, I could eat you now." Eren's eyes widened as his cheeks flared redder by the words Rivaille picked.

"Shut up, now continue with the story!" He hissed at him like a snake to hide his embarrassment. Rivaille lifted up his cup and slurped the coffee, pleased when the caffeine went down his throat. He drew the cup away from his lips only a few inches and chuckled slightly.

"Right. You wanted to hear an explanation of what exactly?" Eren stayed silent, thinking until Rivaille decided to just start from the time they were starting into each other's pants. He put the cup down and leaned forward.

"You were so submissive the time when you were released from the dungeon, afraid of making mistakes with everything you did. It pissed me off greatly because I just couldn't think of any other way to make you relax. I thought at first it was your nature, but lately I found out that you seemed more relaxed when you're surrounded by your friends. I don't know until when the feeling started, Eren, but I realized that I'm getting jealous because I'm not able to see you smile in front of me like you did in front of your friends." Eren fidgeted when Rivaille ran the tissue he was holding to clean the mess on the corner of his boyfriend's lips. Blushing at his carelessness, Eren licked his lips clean. The smirk never leaving Rivaille's lips when he saw that tongue wetting those chapped lips.

"We're finally able to understand each other after that ruckus with the Female Titan." Those emerald orbs flickered curiously.

"What happened?" Rivaille squeezed Eren's hand tighter.

_"Ouch." Eren rubbed his head when a rock was thrown to him from behind. His face looked back to find a child glaring daggers in his direction._

_"Get away from wall Sina, you monster!" He shouted, obviously trying to be brave. Eren did nothing but huff tiredly. Why were they in wall Sina again? Oh yes, there's some ruckus about a Female Titan invaded the inner wall and they were ordered to help out. He was still feeling tired and drained over the event that was happening. The Scouting Legion got to clean the mess, the Military Police obviously treating them like some kind of slaves. Their leader, Irvin was off with the other high authorities to have a meeting on the runaway titan while the underlings ought to help out cleaning the corpses and scattered debris._

_"Hey, what are you doing? Get away from him! Do you want to get eaten?!" A voice made all the nearby soldiers look up. The mother of the child pulled him away while her eyes looked scared, blatantly accusing the Titan-shifter for being there._

_"Ignore them." Mikasa whispered, patting on his shoulder while Eren gave her a reassuring smile. He nodded and walked away._

_"Seriously, I don't get why they are still keeping the boy while it's obvious he is a monster." Another angry retort got thrown towards him while Eren picked up heavy debris off the ground. Armin, who just jumped down from the roof with his 3D gear eyed the man with a frown, his blue eyes shifted to the brunet._

_"Don't mind them." He said and helped him pick the debris up._

_"I hope this is not just their scenario for getting the good side of the King. I mean, they eat from the taxes after all." The woman continued, pushing her son away from his attempt to throw another rock to one of the scouting soldiers nearby._

_Corporal Rivaille was not far from them when he observed the whole thing. He walked towards the soldiers and ordered them to get back to their headquarters before one of them caused any unwanted casualties. He eyed Eren when the boy walked past him with an unreadable expression. Eren flinched when Rivaille put his hand on his shoulder._

_"Corporal…"_

_"Get some rest. You look pale." Rivaille muttered and squeezed his hand into him._

_"Eren, your nose is bleeding." Armin shouted in concerned, he hurriedly ran to him._

_"He looks like he's gonna fainted anytime soon. Come on, let's go back." Connie shouted from across them. Eren's head started to spin, almost losing his footing as he clutched his throbbing head. Strong arms caught him right before he landed on the ground, surprising him as he got lifted up. _

_"Wha-"_

_"Stop struggling! You're not light either!" He shut his mouth when he was being reprimanded. Eren's face flushed when his superior brought him in his arms right in front of everyone and walked towards the nearby carriage. Rivaille put him down gently and told the others to hurry up and go back to their building using their horses and gears. Right after he closed the door and the carriage started moving, he eyed Eren in concern. The brunet was panting slightly and sweating a lot. He brought his hand to touch his forehead, not surprised when he felt the fever on his palm. Rivaille pulled his handkerchief and pressed on Eren's nose to stop the dripping blood. _

_"How many times do I have to tell you to look after yourself, brat?" He cursed when Eren grunted in response. He shifted in his seat and circled his arm around Eren's shoulder, pulling him closer. He let the boy's head rested on his shoulder._

_"Corporal, you are warm." Rivaille looked down at him. He stayed silent for a moment, let out a sigh and kissed his forehead._

_"Get some rest until we arrive."_

* * *

_Eren blinked several times, trying to make out his surroundings. He slowly sat up, surprised when almost dry, folded clothes fell onto his lap. He picked it up and put it aside, thinking that his fever had gone down. He must have used up all his energy to shift into Titan form a few times and finally collapsed. Wondering just how many hours he slept, he jumped when he looked to his side. His eyes found his superior sitting on the chair beside the bed, arms crossed in front of his chest but his eyes were closed. Eyeing the man in confusion, he wondered if Rivaille was the one who nursed him. The man's head slowly bobbed down, so lost in his own dream that Eren had to chuckle at the sight. It was a rare sight seeing Rivaille so unguarded. _

_The chuckle brought the man to a stir and opened his eyes though, making Eren bite the bottom of his lip. The nervousness came back without him wanting to, he couldn't help it. He had admired him beyond words; Eren had always watched him from afar, even the time when he was still a trainee. The time when he saw Rivaille on the front line behind Irvin when the team were about to head out the wall, he was marveled by the sight. He never wanted to miss the chance to look at him from the middle of the crowd ever since then._

_Eren felt even more nervous when Rivaille took him in, helping him out from the dungeon and from the courtroom, gained him custody to watch over him. Even if what he did was only for duty, Eren felt his hope get raised up every time the man had ordered him around, telling him to rest when he noticed he wasn't well enough to train. Telling him to eat properly and even to stay by his side during their time out of the expedition. He knew the man's order meant nothing other than an order, but Eren felt different. He wondered if his superior had noticed his feelings though, Eren could be so transparent._

_"You are awake. How are you feeling?" Rivaille asked, breaking his thoughts. Eren gave a silent nod, averting his eyes from those ravens orbs._

_"Answer me properly, Eren." Eren stiffened and raised his eyes to look directly at him, pounding his fist on his heart._

_"Yes sir, I'm fine, sir! Thank you for your concern!" he said, eyes glazing with respect. Rivaille's eyebrow twitched at the answer. He wasn't meant for the boy to respond like that. Shaking his head disbelieved, Rivaille exhaled softly._

_"Relax a little will you?" He offered, rubbing the back of his neck tiredly. _

_"I'm fine. I'm sorry. It's just that…" he stopped his sentence, unsure if he should continue, not knowing how Rivaille would take it. He was surprised when Rivaille put his fingers on his chin, forcing him to stare right into him._

_"Can't you put your guard down in front of me? Surely it's been so long since I took custody of you. You look so stiff every time I see you, yet you can smile before your friends." Rivaille voiced out, eyes still not leaving those green eyes of his. Eren opened his mouth and closed it, unsure how he should reply.. A dust of crimson colored his cheeks when Rivaille let his hand drop, still waiting for him to continue. The titan-shifter cupped his mouth for a moment, brows frowning, deep in thought._

_"I'm sorry, I was… nervous, I guess. Being in front of you made me nervous because I admire you so much, Corporal. I just felt the need to do everything perfect in front of you and not to let everything get in the way."_

_The way his superior gazed at him made Eren wonder if he had talked too much. He was astonished when Rivaille leaned closer to his face and gave a light kiss on the lips. Eren closed his eyes, enjoying the small touch on his lips until Rivaille tilted his head and kissed him deeper, letting it all out when the boy didn't resist. Eren jolted when his superior's tongue lapped across his lips, seeking entrance. The gasp made him gain victory and enter without waiting, making Eren let out a small moan when their tongues meet. The battle went on for a few seconds before Rivaille pulled away, eyeing the boy with a smug expression._

_"Nice expression." He whispered against his lips. Eren's face flushed brightly._

_"I didn't know you shared the same feelings." Eren breathed. That statement made Rivaille flinch._

_"You… what do you think I have been doing to you for all this time?" Eren's eyes widened in surprise._

_"What?"_

_"What do you think I've been doing? Bringing you to my arms when you were sick, telling you to eat properly and even kissed you on your forehead. I've done it many times; you didn't even catch the hints? How stupid are you?" Rivaille grunted when Eren was lost for words._

_"I… I thought you were just… acting nice. Like a mother hen." Rivaille cursed under his breath._

_"Someone won't kiss you on your forehead if they were just acting nice, idiot. I'm glad I kissed you on the lips." Rivaille muttered, massaging his temple frustratingly while his face was red like a bulb._

"You were so dense I could punch you in the face." Rivaille muttered, eyeing Eren who was now face-palming in front of him. He let out a satisfied smirk when Eren grunted in return.

"The story went on as we got closer and closer, as the time went by. The time when we were going to go out of the expedition one day, the night before, we made that four promises with each other." Eren pulled his hand away, shyly eyeing Rivaille when he gave another explanation.

"We were having hot sex during that time." The brunet's eyes widened, his face couldn't get any redder when he heard him. Rivaille's eyes looked dreamily for a second, he didn't let Eren retracted his hand from his hold on the table.

_Heavy breathing mingled as they looked at each other after they came back from their high. Eren moaned when Rivaille pressed soft kisses on his sweaty bare chest, he wrapped his arm around the man's back, closing his eyes in enjoyment._

_"You know what?" Eren looked up at him with half opened eyes, smiling as Rivaille kissed the corner of his eyelid. He stayed silent, letting him continue._

_"Every time we're going outside the wall, I'm always anxious about losing you. I don't know what will happen out there. I knew you can't die easily, but I'm still worried. Stay by my side always, Eren." Rivaille pressed his lips firmly against the boy beneath him. _

_"Let's make a promise then." Eren murmured when they parted for breath. Rivaille pressed their forehead against each other._

_"Promises?"_

_"Yes, just a simple promises so that we won't be apart."_

_"Like a pinky promise? That's lame." Eren rolled his eyes at the last word._

_"No, make it sweeter. Maybe with kisses?" Rivaille thought for a moment before he gave a kiss on his forehead._

_"Like this?" Eren chuckled, he loved it when the man did that to him. He moved up to return the kiss on his nose. Rivaille wore a thin loving smile and kissed him on the cheek. Feeling a warm pleasure spreading across his body, Eren pulled him down to claim his lips again. They moved their lips together, smacking their lips against each other hungrily before Rivaille pulled away._

_"You are deliberately trying to re-arouse me." he grumbled while pushing his hard member against Eren who mewled at the contact._

_"Nggh, Rivaille."_

_"Let's make that become our promise." Rivaille pulled back a bit and took something from inside the drawer of his nightstand. Eren frowned while trying to focus on their conversation. He then felt Rivaille pressed his lips against his forehead, whispering to him._

_"I'll give you my heart." He moved to kiss his nose while taking Eren's left hand into his._

_"My soul." When Rivaille kissed his cheek, Eren looked up the time his eyes caught a shimmering metallic object his superior was holding._

_"My everything." Eren flushed brightly when saw a cold round metal slid into his ring finger._

_"Ri-Rivaille… this…" _

_"… and so we'll never be apart." He kissed him on the lips when Eren's tears slid down to his cheek in happiness. _

_Rivaille gave a panting breath when he broke their heated kiss. He moved to rub his erection against his underling's, earning a soft moan from his lover._

_"Eren, marry me." Rivaille whispered against his ear, listening to a choked sound from Eren when the boy raised his hand high in the air. The emerald glistened in the dark, the same color as his eyes. The ring was beautiful, Eren couldn't help but felt overwhelmed with so many emotions._

_"Yes… YES!" He shouted while wrapping his arms around the man tightly, sobbing in happiness. Together they embraced each other tightly, move to find relief and lost in the pleasures of the world they created._

_"Nngh… Ah. Corporal…" Eren gave a gasp when Rivaille slid himself back into his lover. He grunted at the feeling of being stretched once again. A guttural moan came out from his superior when his length got engulfed in the tight warmth once again. Rivaille pulled out and slammed back into him, earning a sharp yelp from Eren as his cock was fully inside him. He whined, gripping the tangled sheet with his trembling hands, burying his head back into the pillow. _

_"Eren, call my name" Rivaille panted while he licked down Eren's neck. His lover's moaning and groaning only brought him closer to the edge._

_"Rivaille" Eren rasped when the hand wrapped around his cock, pumping vigorously. He mewled when Rivaille played with the tip while moving himself faster into him. The way he called out his name was enough for the man to shudder, feeling his peak nearer. He needed to wait for Eren._

_"Eren, come for me, Eren. Let me come inside you." Eren's increased voice fueled him to pound into him harder. His lover cried out as he wrapped his leg around Rivaille's waist, grunted when the position only brought him deeper inside. Eren buried his face into the crook of Rivaille's neck, biting him there when the tip of Rivaille length brushed something deep within him._

_"AH... Rivaille. There... please harder" Eren shouted, obviously lost in the pleasure feeling when Rivaille aimed his pleasure spot again. He wrapped his arms around his neck, jerking violently when he came, chanting his lover's name as a warm white substance pooling out from his cock. Rivaille groaned while pressing their mouth together, thrusts in a few times and shuddered._

_"Eren…" Eren whined against his mouth when he felt the warm liquid fill him._

_"I love you…" Eren whispered, smiling at the man on top of him, whispering those three words again and again. Rivaille closed his eyes, he would never get tired when hearing those words coming from Eren's mouth. He brought his hand into his, kissing the ring lightly and replied those three words with a husky whisper._

"Those four promises were actually the way I proposed to you." Eren's eyes watered when he listened to the story. The pain in his chest just got worse than before. He knew the feeling, it was painfully familiar yet he couldn't grasp all of the images.

"We're both so happy after that, protecting each other when we were outside the wall. Spending our time together until several months."

Eren swallowed the heavy lump in his throat, watching when the man's face contorted at the changed topic.

"Everything was alright until those bastards were trying to make you guilty by bringing up that topic about female titan in wall Sina into the court."

_"Eren Jaeger!" Eren raised his head when he was called in rather harshly. He saw the man with a military police uniform approaching him after he stepped out of the carriage. Rivaille stepped forward, raising his left hand as if shielding the Titan-shifter from the man's grasp._

_"Is there something you need,_ _Nile?" He asked the man, sending him an intimidating look. Nile Dawk scoffed when he saw how protective Rivaille was towards the boy. His eyes caught a glimpse of the ring worn on his finger, it had a similar design as Eren's. The man sneered at him._

_"Apparently, your lover was summoned back to the court, last time we didn't get a real decision of the situation. Here, I got the legal letter." Rivaille took the letter from his hand, glaring up at him. After checking that the letter was indeed from Dallis Zacklay with the legal stamp, Rivaille grimaced._

_"Why now?" The messenger shrugged at him._

_"Just get into the court and we'll see. You have to let Irvin know as well." The man turned around to walk with his fellow soldiers back to their carriage. Eren stepped forward._

_"Don't worry, we'll do something about it."_

_"What's the letter about?" Eren frowned, eyeing the opened letter that was supposed to be his. Rivaille shook his head._

_"It just says that you're summoned back to the court without any information." Rivaille let him read the letter on his own. Eren shook his head._

_"They are obviously trying to bring you down." Eren stared at the letter Rivaille crumpled in his hand. He grabbed his fist, giving him a reassuring smile to his superior._

_"I'll manage." Eren whispered._

Both of them stayed silent, Eren could tell that Rivaille was searching for the right words to continue the story. He put down his fork after a few moments of silence between them. He frowned when the man blinked a few times, exhaling nervously. When Rivaille put his forehead against the palm of his hand, Eren went rigid in his seat.

"Look, Eren… I… I'm not ready for this part… It's not like I'm trying to hide it from you or anything. It's heavy. These memories are too heavy for me to…" he paused, unsure what he was supposed to explain to make him understand. Eren squeezed his hand lightly, giving him a warm reassuring smile.

"It's okay. We'll continue next time, Rivaille. I'm sorry." Rivaille gave a soft chuckle, shaking his head.

"Silly boy, don't say sorry." He whispered, giving him a sad look for one last time.

"Hey, let's go home. You wanted to meet my father, right?" Eren said, giving him a smile to try to cheer him up. Rivaille nodded in silence, both of them walked out from the café hand in hand without words until they were on the front of the train station. When the older of the two stopped walking, Eren looked at him in concern. He wondered if he forced the man too much for telling him about the past. He was surprised when Rivaille suddenly pulled him into a tight hug, kissing him forcefully. Eren gave out a loud moan, his hands fisting on Rivaille's jacket, trembling slightly at the way Rivaille licked his mouth. He tried to break free from his grasp when their body pressed up close against each other to the point Eren could feel the hardness against him. Blushing when he felt the contact, he tried to distance himself from him.

"Uhmh. Rivaille…" He tried to stop him, panting slightly when his saliva dripped down his chin. The way his tutor looked at him made him feel more embarrassed for some reason. Rivaille put his forehead against his shoulder, breathing in his scent. Eren held his arms with trembling hands, letting the man do what he wanted.

"I'm sorry, the memory has been too hot to be forgotten." Eren's breath hitched.

"It's alright." Eren closed his eyes, his fingers were playing with Rivaille's hair lightly. They stayed like that for a few minutes until Eren decided to call home to let his sister know that Rivaille was coming over. He didn't want her to throw a fit when she hadn't prepared anything for extra dinner.

"I'll call Mikasa before we arrive. Is that alright?" He pulled out his phone when Rivaille nodded. Waiting for his sister to pick up his phone, he closed his eyes while his boyfriend showered him with kisses on his face.

"Mikasa, Ah, I'm going to go home now. Rivaille wanted to meet Dad." Eren pushed the man off him when he nibbled on his earlobe playfully.

_"Eren, actually I'm in the hospital at the moment. I'm sorry for not telling you anything."_ Eren almost dropped his phone.

"What? Which hospital are you in?!" Rivaille threw him a shocked look.

_"No, it's not me. It's Marco. We met during our time getting out from the market. There was an accident, Jean almost got run over by a car, but Marco shoved him away. He's injured and we brought them to the hospital nearby."_

"Is he alright?"

_"He hasn't woken up yet, but if you want to go here, I'll give you the details. We'll be home late so I'm afraid that I can't prepare dinner for you. You can go ahead and buy some takeaway food if you want to."_

"Alright, give me the name of the hospital via message. I'll go there." Eren closed his phone, giving Rivaille an apologetic look.

"I'm sorry, is it alright if I go to the hospital? Marco got into an accident."

"I'll go with you." Rivaille gave him a comforting look. Eren squeezed his hand back and nod.

* * *

Jean looked up when he saw his friend walk towards him in silence. He was sitting on the bench across Marco's room in deep thought with Mikasa by his side. He wasn't sure what kind of face he should show them, but when he forced a smile, Eren gave him a look.

"How is Marco?" Eren asked.

"He is fine… He hasn't woken up yet but at least he's fine. It was a hit and run. Well, I don't know, I don't want to hold a grudge… Only…" Jean paused, hands gesturing for the word to spill.

"Only… his wound on his face won't heal that fast. It will leave a scar. He also broke his leg."

"It's better that way…" Eren spoke up, Jean gave a several nods at his words.

"Yes…. Yes, you are right. He's alive, that's what matter… I'm glad that we got your father near us for being able to act quickly. I… I can't lose Marco… he saved my life." Jean stopped, swallowing nervously right after he said the last words.

"Everything will be alright…" Mikasa whispered to her friend.

The three of them looked at the door when a few people came out.

"It's alright, his injury is not fatal. He just blacked out because of shock from the pain. His leg will be fine after few weeks." A wash of relief painted their faces when they heard the news from Grisha.

"Can we go inside?" Jean rose to his feet when Grisha nodded.

"I'll have to report the medical treatments with the doctors here. Call us if he wakes."

"I… I'll pay for the bills." Jean stuttered as he heard the man. Grisha gave him a small reassuring smile before patting his shoulder and turned around without words.

"Don't think about that for the time being. That's what he said." Mikasa muttered to her friend. Jean hesitated for a moment.

"Let's go in." Eren said while opening the door.

After getting inside, they talked about the accident. Marco hadn't woken up for about half an hour. When he finally stirred, Jean was getting anxious, asking if he was alright and all. The guy only smiled at him, telling him that he currently didn't feel anything because of the painkillers. The only thing he complained about was that his leg hung quiet uncomfortably which earned chuckles from his friends.

It was past an hour when Mikasa reminded Eren that he had his own business for the day. His boyfriend wasn't coming inside the ward. The man was smart enough not to come near his classmates.

"Eren, you can go now. I mean, maybe you can take your dinner somewhere? I'll stay here until dad finishes."

"Oh, sure. Go ahead, thanks for visiting." Jean said, rubbing the back of his neck nervously. Eren gave a nod.

"Thank you, Eren." Marco gave him a gentle smile.

"I… I'll get going." Mikasa nodded at him when their eyes met. She knew that Rivaille was waiting for him outside. They might as well meet at home if they wanted to.

By the time Eren left the room after waving to his friends, his mind trailed to his boyfriend. He took his mobile phone out of his jean pocket and texted him, wondering where he was. Rivaille had told him that he needed to go to the toilet right after they went inside the lobby. Just before his message was sent, he gasped in surprise when he crashed into someone going his way.

"Sorry, I'm—"

"Brat, look where you are going…" Eren startled after seeing Rivaille stood before him.

"Hey, sorry for the wait. I thought you'd come inside."

"I can't say that I just went on a date with you, now can I? Seeing that I came with you to the hospital would be weird as well, even if I lied that I bumped into you on the street. How was it? Is your friend alright?" Eren nodded at the question.

"He's fine. He got a broken leg that will heal in a few weeks and a scar on his face. He had woken up and he's alright. At least his heart is still beating." Eren gave a short nod, looking rather forlorn. Rivaille fixed his eyes on him, before taking his hand on his.

"I'm sure it's painful, but at least he's alive. That's what matters. I've lost so many lives before my eyes that I could barely do anything to stop death. You should be grateful, at least your father had a chance to save lives. Maybe it will come down to you too, who knows." Rivaille looked hurt for a moment, it was obvious that he felt the pain of losing his friends in the past. Eren chuckled when he heard the last sentence.

"Mikasa is much fitter than me for being a doctor. I'm not smart enough." Rivaille ruffled his hair affectionately.

"You are just lazy, you brat." Both guys stared at each other before Eren's lips curved.

"I'm alright. If there's someone who should be crying, it'll be Jean." Rivaille nodded shortly and cupped Eren's face in his hands. Pulling him closer so that he could give him a soft kiss on his forehead, trying to make Eren feel better by a simple affection.

"Eren?" Eren jumped at his name. He whipped his head to look at his father and breathed out in relief.

"What's with that shocked face?" Grisha chuckled at his son.

"I thought it was someone else, Dad. By the way, this is Rivaille." Eren immediately pushed his boyfriend forward. Grisha blinked at the man before him, the boy whom he had seen was now an adult.

"Doctor Jaeger, long time no see." Rivaille gave a slight bow to him. He was surprised when Grisha enveloped him into a tight hug.

"Rivaille, how are you? It's been so long." Rivaille bit his lip, not moving from his spot even if Grisha had pulled him into his arms. Eren was watching from the sideline, unsure what to do with the event before his eyes. He knew that they had met before in their childhood, but Eren didn't remember how close they were.

"I'm sorry." Rivaille breathed, Grisha shook his head at him.

"Don't say that. If anything, I should thank you because Eren is safe. He's healthy now, he's fine. You shouldn't feel sorry. You should be glad that you caught him in your arms that time." Grisha patted him on his shoulder when Rivaille finally able to raise his head again. Eren smiled at them.

"I'm alive, that's what matters." He said and gripped Rivaille's hand with a big smile on his face. Rivaille felt some heavy burden slowly lifted up from his shoulders as he squeezed his hand back.

_TBC_

I wonder if this chp is too long? n.n'' Anyway, I hope this chp is sweet enough that you got cavity xD Anyway, Marco's accident is important for Armin's feeling towards Jean. You'll see.

Thank you for the reviews –hugs all-


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